Pay Day
Viewing comments for Chapter 8 "Pay Day, pt 8"One fine spring day at school
7 total reviews
Comment from Wendy G
I am so glad nothing happened on that day. All these students have been moved to give up their ideas and perhaps start a new life. Who knows what may happen in the next chapter? Looking forward to it.
Wendy
reply by the author on 12-Feb-2023
I am so glad nothing happened on that day. All these students have been moved to give up their ideas and perhaps start a new life. Who knows what may happen in the next chapter? Looking forward to it.
Wendy
Comment Written 12-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 12-Feb-2023
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Thank you for your great review.
Comment from Carol Hillebrenner
This was really great, wonderful that the 5 young men knew their choice for that day had been a bad choice. It's so great that someone came home from school, and nothing had happened. No errors found.
reply by the author on 12-Feb-2023
This was really great, wonderful that the 5 young men knew their choice for that day had been a bad choice. It's so great that someone came home from school, and nothing had happened. No errors found.
Comment Written 11-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 12-Feb-2023
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Thank you for your very nice review.
Comment from Pam Lonsdale
James' voiced cracked to barely discernible. Change voiced to voice.
Wayne, I really like how you are sectioning this story out - last week the troubled kids were confronted and decided not to take action; this week we are finding out what they are doing in the aftermath of their decisions. They are looking for help - for hope.
Very good section.
Pam
reply by the author on 11-Feb-2023
James' voiced cracked to barely discernible. Change voiced to voice.
Wayne, I really like how you are sectioning this story out - last week the troubled kids were confronted and decided not to take action; this week we are finding out what they are doing in the aftermath of their decisions. They are looking for help - for hope.
Very good section.
Pam
Comment Written 11-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 11-Feb-2023
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Thank you. And once again for the catch.
Comment from Zinnia48
I was very moved, actually a little tearful, while reading this. It also made me a bit anxious. I was a social worker for many years and recognized the trouble and pain these kids were in. You did a great jog of describing each child. The conversation was natural. Thank you and looking forward to the next chapter. zinnia
reply by the author on 11-Feb-2023
I was very moved, actually a little tearful, while reading this. It also made me a bit anxious. I was a social worker for many years and recognized the trouble and pain these kids were in. You did a great jog of describing each child. The conversation was natural. Thank you and looking forward to the next chapter. zinnia
Comment Written 11-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 11-Feb-2023
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Thank you. It was easy since to a degree I've been all of them (except James was embellished - I was just dumped).
I've also been the Bible club people, but only after the USMC grew me up.
Comment from lyenochka
Now we can breathe a sigh of relief. I liked how you had each troubled kid find a different way to solace, comfort, and God. One went to a church. Another met with a trusted friend. And the brainy kid went directly to reading the gospel of John. Each one is unique and needed to find God in his own way. The story makes us wonder how often the Holy Spirit does intervene and we never knew because it was just another fine, spring day.
reply by the author on 11-Feb-2023
Now we can breathe a sigh of relief. I liked how you had each troubled kid find a different way to solace, comfort, and God. One went to a church. Another met with a trusted friend. And the brainy kid went directly to reading the gospel of John. Each one is unique and needed to find God in his own way. The story makes us wonder how often the Holy Spirit does intervene and we never knew because it was just another fine, spring day.
Comment Written 11-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 11-Feb-2023
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Thank you. Exactly the reaction/response I hoped for. Thank you.
Comment from royowen
I had to laugh at the girl's response to her mother's enquiry as to hat sort of day she'd had, reminds me of my granddaughter's response to the same question, it seems to me there was lots going on. Well done Wayne, great episode my friend, blessings Roy
reply by the author on 11-Feb-2023
I had to laugh at the girl's response to her mother's enquiry as to hat sort of day she'd had, reminds me of my granddaughter's response to the same question, it seems to me there was lots going on. Well done Wayne, great episode my friend, blessings Roy
Comment Written 11-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 11-Feb-2023
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Thank you for your great review.
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Most welcome
Comment from Ricky1024
This "Payday Pt.8" was well written rich in Theme and Imagery.
It also, read well and Flowed well with no Grammar Issues.
...
My Complete Synopsis:
The Adjective and Objective Contents were both Excellent and Exceptional while Descriptive Measures aligned Perfectly.
Thanks for sharing this Wayne and have a blessed Saturday.
Doctor Ricky 1024
reply by the author on 11-Feb-2023
This "Payday Pt.8" was well written rich in Theme and Imagery.
It also, read well and Flowed well with no Grammar Issues.
...
My Complete Synopsis:
The Adjective and Objective Contents were both Excellent and Exceptional while Descriptive Measures aligned Perfectly.
Thanks for sharing this Wayne and have a blessed Saturday.
Doctor Ricky 1024
Comment Written 11-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 11-Feb-2023
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Thank you.