Some Call It Luck
Viewing comments for Chapter 62 "Some Call It Luck - Chapter 62"A unique friendship affects the course of 2 lives.
8 total reviews
Comment from Carol Hillebrenner
Good chapter with plenty of activity. The phone call by Abby to Dana was good; she didn't argue, she just stated a fact and then went to Dana's house to get the suit.
reply by the author on 05-Feb-2023
Good chapter with plenty of activity. The phone call by Abby to Dana was good; she didn't argue, she just stated a fact and then went to Dana's house to get the suit.
Comment Written 04-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 05-Feb-2023
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She's come a long way since the beginning, having gained a lot of confidence.
Comment from Jay Squires
Once again, Abby took the high road with Dana. Dana showed her cowardice. I was a little disappointed in Abby's admission that neither Dana nor she wanted to face each other. I can kind of understand it, but I'd hoped that she could have received her "pound of flesh" by watching Dana's face ... and not simply suffered in private. Then again, that might just show that Abby was more mature than I would have been in the same situation.
Jay
reply by the author on 04-Feb-2023
Once again, Abby took the high road with Dana. Dana showed her cowardice. I was a little disappointed in Abby's admission that neither Dana nor she wanted to face each other. I can kind of understand it, but I'd hoped that she could have received her "pound of flesh" by watching Dana's face ... and not simply suffered in private. Then again, that might just show that Abby was more mature than I would have been in the same situation.
Jay
Comment Written 03-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 04-Feb-2023
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Probably me too, but it was more for the plot, as that would have spoiled the next chapter.
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Ah, yes! The things we do for our children and our plot.
Comment from barbara.wilkey
I'm glad Abby got the suit back. I doubt we've heard the end of Dana, yet. I do hope she does the right thing. I like this story and am going to be sad when it ends.
We said goodbye, and he left then. (We said goodbye, and then he left.)
She paused for a beat and then said, "What are you talking about, Abby?" (period after 'beat' omit 'and then said,')
I sat down with Kenny for a while in the family room. (omit 'down')
"So how did it go?" he asked me. (omit 'me')
She was in bed reading when I sat down on the edge of the bed with her. (omit 'down')
"Did you get it back, Mom?" she asked as she looked at me anxiously. (You shouldn't use 'looked'. There are better ways to express anxiously, show, don't tell. 'she asked as her eyes widened. or something like that.)
"I love you, Mom," she said to me. (omit 'to me')
reply by the author on 03-Feb-2023
I'm glad Abby got the suit back. I doubt we've heard the end of Dana, yet. I do hope she does the right thing. I like this story and am going to be sad when it ends.
We said goodbye, and he left then. (We said goodbye, and then he left.)
She paused for a beat and then said, "What are you talking about, Abby?" (period after 'beat' omit 'and then said,')
I sat down with Kenny for a while in the family room. (omit 'down')
"So how did it go?" he asked me. (omit 'me')
She was in bed reading when I sat down on the edge of the bed with her. (omit 'down')
"Did you get it back, Mom?" she asked as she looked at me anxiously. (You shouldn't use 'looked'. There are better ways to express anxiously, show, don't tell. 'she asked as her eyes widened. or something like that.)
"I love you, Mom," she said to me. (omit 'to me')
Comment Written 03-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 03-Feb-2023
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Thank you so much, Barbara. I'm going to be sad when it ends too, as I've really enjoyed sharing it with folks on FS and getting terrific input such as yours. Your suggestions and corrections have been very helpful, and I thank you kindly for taking the time to make them.
Comment from jmdg1954
Another good chapter. I thought there would have been a little more push back or fight coming from Dana before relinquishing the suit.
Maybe a confrontation is coming? I'll have to wait.
Best, John
reply by the author on 03-Feb-2023
Another good chapter. I thought there would have been a little more push back or fight coming from Dana before relinquishing the suit.
Maybe a confrontation is coming? I'll have to wait.
Best, John
Comment Written 03-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 03-Feb-2023
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Thanks, John. We'll see that tomorrow, and why there wasn't more push back from Dana.
Comment from Douglas Goff
Two more chapters! Great story. I liked the character development from beginning g to end. I didn't write a lot of reviews because I didn't find many mistakes. I did catch a fine tune here in the first paragraph :
By the time we finished our pizza then all had a bowl of ice cream for dessert, E.J. announced that he had to leave.
(Pizza, then )
Minor, but flows better.
Good stuff. The dialogue with the kids at the end seemed very realistic.
Nice work here!
reply by the author on 03-Feb-2023
Two more chapters! Great story. I liked the character development from beginning g to end. I didn't write a lot of reviews because I didn't find many mistakes. I did catch a fine tune here in the first paragraph :
By the time we finished our pizza then all had a bowl of ice cream for dessert, E.J. announced that he had to leave.
(Pizza, then )
Minor, but flows better.
Good stuff. The dialogue with the kids at the end seemed very realistic.
Nice work here!
Comment Written 03-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 03-Feb-2023
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Thank you very much, Douglas. Good catch there. I agree.
Comment from Kaiku
A tale of woes for one and an improved disposition for others. Patent pending might be more appropriate than insurance but I am curious to see where this all leads. Good reading.
reply by the author on 03-Feb-2023
A tale of woes for one and an improved disposition for others. Patent pending might be more appropriate than insurance but I am curious to see where this all leads. Good reading.
Comment Written 03-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 03-Feb-2023
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Thanks for the good review.
Actually, she already has a patent on it, but the insurance is just to guard against loss.
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I probably missed that. Your story is very interesting and engaging
Comment from Tom Horonzy
and now I feel a letdown coming or the story is close to its end. As for this chapter, I thought Abby would open the garment bag and find the suit ripped and torn. Missed how this event took place.
reply by the author on 03-Feb-2023
and now I feel a letdown coming or the story is close to its end. As for this chapter, I thought Abby would open the garment bag and find the suit ripped and torn. Missed how this event took place.
Comment Written 03-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 03-Feb-2023
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Yes, just 2 chapters to go. That would have been a possibility to have Dana rip up the suit, but hopefully there will be a better resolution in the final 2 chapters.
Comment from royowen
She could have reported what Dana had done, but she didn't, she still had the satisfaction of knowing that she would have won if for the the apprehension of the suit, most satisfying episode, a good result, what would make it complete would be if Dana became a friend, or perhaps she's a leopard. Beautifully written, blessings Roy
reply by the author on 03-Feb-2023
She could have reported what Dana had done, but she didn't, she still had the satisfaction of knowing that she would have won if for the the apprehension of the suit, most satisfying episode, a good result, what would make it complete would be if Dana became a friend, or perhaps she's a leopard. Beautifully written, blessings Roy
Comment Written 03-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 03-Feb-2023
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Thanks, Roy. You've gotten the salient point of Abby's character, which is that she doesn't need the recognition of others to be able to exult in her "win." This will be made even clearer in the next chapter with Dana.
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She?s a better man than me Gungedin