Comment from Mark Schardine

Excellent

I think of the song "A Day in the Life of a Fool" with its haunting melody. Time passes by slowly, and a person can only ponder how life seems to offer nothing but sorrow.

 Comment Written 05-Feb-2023

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reply by the author on 05-Feb-2023

Thank you very much for your time, kind review, and helpfull feedback.

Gypsy hugs

Comment from kahpot

Excellent

Chasing love can have severe consequences, they say fools follow their heart, but if we do not our path will not lead to life or loves satisfaction, very well written****kahpot

 Comment Written 01-Feb-2023

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reply by the author on 02-Feb-2023

Thank you very much for your time, kind review, and helpfull feedback.

Gypsy hugs

Comment from Mary Vigasin

Excellent

A very haunting and sad Tanka. The realization that love will never be fulfilled "as the moon chased the sun.
Well done and beautifully presented.
Best wishes
Mary

 Comment Written 31-Jan-2023

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reply by the author on 01-Feb-2023

Thank you very much! I appreciate your thoughtful review and kind words.

Gypsy

Comment from Ricky1024

Excellent

This Short Tanka talks about Unconditional love.
We'll presented with Excellent art.
It read well and Flowed well with no Grammar Issues.
Thanks for sharing this and have a blessed day.
Doctor Ricky

 Comment Written 31-Jan-2023

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reply by the author on 31-Jan-2023

Thank you very much for your time, kind review, and helpfull feedback.

Gypsy hugs

Comment from barbara.wilkey

Excellent

I like the metaphor of the moon chases the sun as chasing a love that appears not to happen. The moon will never catch the sun as that love will never happen. Thank you for the complete presentation again.

 Comment Written 31-Jan-2023

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reply by the author on 31-Jan-2023

Thank you very much for your time, kind review, and helpfull feedback.

Gypsy hugs

Comment from AP Apgar

Excellent

I like your modern Tanka poem - nice picture presentation - good count and connection between lines - good use of metaphors - I like "moon chases the sun" - nice - the story is short and concise - saying all without verbosity and over production - nice job - most all of us have been in that position with a person we knew was wrong for us - a world of fools - all that glitters is not gold - Good Job. AP

 Comment Written 31-Jan-2023

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reply by the author on 31-Jan-2023

Thank you very much for your time, kind review, and helpfull feedback.

Gypsy hugs

Comment from Jasmine Girl

Excellent

This is such a moving poem about your love for someone. I like the metaphor of the "moon chases the sun" for your relationship. The color is nice and I have to try this for my next poem.

Well done.

 Comment Written 30-Jan-2023

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reply by the author on 31-Jan-2023

Thank you very much for your time and kind review.

Gypsy hugs

Comment from aryr

Excellent

What a wonderful tanka, Gypsy. I loved the dual pictures as it was indicative of the magical sunset. I really enjoyed your words because they centered around the sunset. Very well done and greatly enjoyed. Blessed be n hugs!

 Comment Written 30-Jan-2023

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reply by the author on 31-Jan-2023

Thank you very much for your time and kind review.

Gypsy hugs

Comment from lyenochka

Excellent

I like how you show the passage of the night as "the moon chases the sun." It's so much more poetic to describe the passing of time that way. It's a great portrayal of the yearning, too.

 Comment Written 30-Jan-2023

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reply by the author on 31-Jan-2023

Thank you, big sister, I'm happy you like it.

Love,

Marival

Comment from Sugarray77

Excellent

I enjoyed reading your tanka, Gypsy. I always think of them in the 5-7-5-7-7 format and I know that is just a bad habit I need to break LOL. Yours is lovely and meaningful... a joy to read.

Melissa

This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.

 Comment Written 30-Jan-2023

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reply by the author on 31-Jan-2023

Thank you very much for your time and kind review.

Gypsy hugs