Daydreams from the Ashes
Viewing comments for Chapter 25 "Unbecoming"Poems and meditations
8 total reviews
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
Unbecoming does not necessary mean unattractive, just worn items do not fit or the colour does not suit. I sense a lack of self esteem in your words here. The word unbecoming is an old fashioned way to look at what women wear and it does seem as though it is from a male point of view, as if women need to wear something more becoming in order to find a mate. This is something we don't succumb to these days. If a garment is unbecoming we may still want to wear it if it fits. The crab outgrows his shell but it wasn't unbecoming, just a bit tight.
Your poem here is food for thought and you break down the barriers of wearing clothing and how we are judged by what we wear. Much enjoyed, love Dolly x
reply by the author on 29-Jan-2023
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Unbecoming does not necessary mean unattractive, just worn items do not fit or the colour does not suit. I sense a lack of self esteem in your words here. The word unbecoming is an old fashioned way to look at what women wear and it does seem as though it is from a male point of view, as if women need to wear something more becoming in order to find a mate. This is something we don't succumb to these days. If a garment is unbecoming we may still want to wear it if it fits. The crab outgrows his shell but it wasn't unbecoming, just a bit tight.
Your poem here is food for thought and you break down the barriers of wearing clothing and how we are judged by what we wear. Much enjoyed, love Dolly x
Comment Written 29-Jan-2023
reply by the author on 29-Jan-2023
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Thank you for reading and reviewing! Unbecoming as a word for unattractive wasn?t what I meant at all, to be honest, other than that we think of undoing as destructive and ugly. I meant it as the opposite of "becoming". I know it?s probably not a real word in that context, but for me it was a poem about healing through empathy for self and gently addressing mistakes, something I wish I was taught more growing up. I hope you don?t mind the explanation of intent. Thank you for giving it your time. I hope you have a wonderful day.
Comment from susand3022
K,
When you figure it out, please, PLEASE, let me know how it works. I haven't figured it out yet and I need to. I was destroyed over 20 some-odd years. Now that it's done, I don't know how to "undo" it. So, if you figure it out, please, let me know.
Susan :)
reply by the author on 29-Jan-2023
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K,
When you figure it out, please, PLEASE, let me know how it works. I haven't figured it out yet and I need to. I was destroyed over 20 some-odd years. Now that it's done, I don't know how to "undo" it. So, if you figure it out, please, let me know.
Susan :)
Comment Written 29-Jan-2023
reply by the author on 29-Jan-2023
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Thank you very much for reading and reviewing! I wish I could be of more help, but I?m still in the tangled and awful portion of learning. Self-compassion is so much harder than extending kindness to others. If I work anything out, I?m sure you?ll see it on here as a poem. Please take care and have a wonderful day. I really appreciate your time.
Comment from Mrs. KT
Hello, K Olsen,
Incredibly moving and deeply resonating, especially, for me, the following stanza:
Not ending, no, but the delicate unraveling
of missed wefts and tangled fibers
woven haphazardly by unceasing hands
ever focused on the next pass.
I appreciate your entire presentation. I would, however, Bold your offering to make it easier to read...
Thank you for sharing!
diane
reply by the author on 29-Jan-2023
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Hello, K Olsen,
Incredibly moving and deeply resonating, especially, for me, the following stanza:
Not ending, no, but the delicate unraveling
of missed wefts and tangled fibers
woven haphazardly by unceasing hands
ever focused on the next pass.
I appreciate your entire presentation. I would, however, Bold your offering to make it easier to read...
Thank you for sharing!
diane
Comment Written 28-Jan-2023
reply by the author on 29-Jan-2023
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Thank you very much for reading and reviewing! I did bold it and increase the font size slightly based on your advice, so hopefully it?s easier to read. I?m glad you found some piece of it that resonated with you and I really appreciate your time. I hope you have a wonderful day.
Comment from Karyn2
Oh this is so fabulous!! I want a clap emoji to give you an applause! Your word uses are wonderful. I want to bookshelf this just to come back and visit some stellar word choices. The notion of "unbecoming" is unique presented and strikes me as profound and yet I wonder why this discussion of "unbecoming' doesn't arise more often. Your analogies to loom and thread and the hermit crab are so fitting. I could go on about how much I loved this. I'm sorry I don't have a 6 but will offer a pump up!
reply by the author on 29-Jan-2023
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Oh this is so fabulous!! I want a clap emoji to give you an applause! Your word uses are wonderful. I want to bookshelf this just to come back and visit some stellar word choices. The notion of "unbecoming" is unique presented and strikes me as profound and yet I wonder why this discussion of "unbecoming' doesn't arise more often. Your analogies to loom and thread and the hermit crab are so fitting. I could go on about how much I loved this. I'm sorry I don't have a 6 but will offer a pump up!
Comment Written 28-Jan-2023
reply by the author on 29-Jan-2023
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Thank you very much for reading and reviewing! I?m glad you enjoyed it and I?m very grateful for the pump. It seems like about 50% of people got what I was meaning, but I don?t really intend to revise it. I think it?s clear to the people who need/want the thought. I appreciate you giving it your time. Thank you again. I hope you have a wonderful day.
Comment from royowen
I felt there was more to this than the references to the wonderfully practical thing of knitting and crocheting, (which my wife insists she's not good, but my inexpert eye says she is) this is beautifully written, but beyond my expertise I'm afraid, well done, blessings Roy
reply by the author on 28-Jan-2023
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I felt there was more to this than the references to the wonderfully practical thing of knitting and crocheting, (which my wife insists she's not good, but my inexpert eye says she is) this is beautifully written, but beyond my expertise I'm afraid, well done, blessings Roy
Comment Written 28-Jan-2023
reply by the author on 28-Jan-2023
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Thank you very much for reading and reviewing. I definitely had more in mind than just textile work when I wrote it, but I'm glad it came across as well written even if the metaphor wasn't a perfect translation of those thoughts. I hope you have a wonderful day. (Also, kudos for telling your wife her knitting and crocheting is good, because whether true or not, it's a wonderful thing for her to hear).
Comment from Ginda Simpson
No exaggeration, this has to be one of the most beautiful piece of writing I have read. I love your words on the art of unbecoming. I will be saving this to read from time to time. I don't have six stars left, but this is a 10! THANK YOU for sharing this.
reply by the author on 28-Jan-2023
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No exaggeration, this has to be one of the most beautiful piece of writing I have read. I love your words on the art of unbecoming. I will be saving this to read from time to time. I don't have six stars left, but this is a 10! THANK YOU for sharing this.
Comment Written 28-Jan-2023
reply by the author on 28-Jan-2023
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Thank you very much for reading and reviewing! It's a thought I might explore further in other poems, because I found it very therapeutic. I'm glad you enjoyed it and I hope it brings some small amount of comfort if you're ever in a headspace where you need the thought. I hope you have a wonderful day.
Comment from HarryT
Really like the idea of writing about unbecoming. To me excellent thinking "outside the box." Most people write about the process of becoming. A couple of small spags. 1. "alright" did you mean all right?
2. carapace stopped me, had to look it up. Maybe use a simpler word like shell.
reply by the author on 28-Jan-2023
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Really like the idea of writing about unbecoming. To me excellent thinking "outside the box." Most people write about the process of becoming. A couple of small spags. 1. "alright" did you mean all right?
2. carapace stopped me, had to look it up. Maybe use a simpler word like shell.
Comment Written 27-Jan-2023
reply by the author on 28-Jan-2023
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Thanks for reading and reviewing. I will tweak the alright into all right. I used it since it was more informal, but fair 'nough as far as grammar. As far as carapace, I didn't want to repeat the word "shell" and it's a word I really like for both sound and aesthetic reasons. Plus, I do enjoy adding to people's lexicons. Thank you very much for taking the time and having the patience to put up with a dictionary exercise. I hope you have a wonderful day.
Comment from Pearl Edwards
Your quiet evening of reflection on healing has produced a beautiful poem K.Olsen.
Perhaps it is not that we grow around our grief,
but that it grows around us - very true, and eventually it feels like a much loved coat. Loved this one, well done.
reply by the author on 28-Jan-2023
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Your quiet evening of reflection on healing has produced a beautiful poem K.Olsen.
Perhaps it is not that we grow around our grief,
but that it grows around us - very true, and eventually it feels like a much loved coat. Loved this one, well done.
Comment Written 27-Jan-2023
reply by the author on 28-Jan-2023
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Thank you very much for reading and reviewing! I appreciate you taking the time (and effort) and I hope you have a wonderful day.