Missing the Mark
An elusive wish..........16 total reviews
Comment from Karyn2
This antonym poem was great in its concept. I felt however, and I hope you don't mind me saying, that the second last line explained too much. The words "however" and "that leads to" meant the reader missed the ah-ha moment of awakening when they discover the poet's intention and meaning. If your third line simply read "it eludes so many" I think this would have been strengthened. Great presentation and the antonym you chose was a really creative idea to work with. Best wishes.
reply by the author on 28-Jan-2023
This antonym poem was great in its concept. I felt however, and I hope you don't mind me saying, that the second last line explained too much. The words "however" and "that leads to" meant the reader missed the ah-ha moment of awakening when they discover the poet's intention and meaning. If your third line simply read "it eludes so many" I think this would have been strengthened. Great presentation and the antonym you chose was a really creative idea to work with. Best wishes.
Comment Written 28-Jan-2023
reply by the author on 28-Jan-2023
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I see what you mean, and I agree. Never feel you cannot voice your opinion. We are all here to grow. It is being judged now, but I will adjust it. Thanks for an honest review.
Comment from jaded831
Your poem reminds me of that song "love the one you're with". Wanting more than one needs to survive is a good thing. But wanting the unreachable leads to sadness. Only we can decide what is unreachable. Great poem.
reply by the author on 28-Jan-2023
Your poem reminds me of that song "love the one you're with". Wanting more than one needs to survive is a good thing. But wanting the unreachable leads to sadness. Only we can decide what is unreachable. Great poem.
Comment Written 28-Jan-2023
reply by the author on 28-Jan-2023
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Thank you so much Mrs. Jaded. I appreciate the exceptional rating.
Comment from Wendy G
Very true. It seems to sneak up on one when one is not actively seeking it. Well presented and meaningful antonym poem. Sending you best wishes for your entry.
Wendy
reply by the author on 27-Jan-2023
Very true. It seems to sneak up on one when one is not actively seeking it. Well presented and meaningful antonym poem. Sending you best wishes for your entry.
Wendy
Comment Written 27-Jan-2023
reply by the author on 27-Jan-2023
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Thank you, Wendy, for the review.
Comment from lyenochka
I liked how you used the theatre masks to illustrate the feelings. I especially liked the description of happiness as the " mystical yearning craved by all." Well said! Best wishes in the contest!
reply by the author on 27-Jan-2023
I liked how you used the theatre masks to illustrate the feelings. I especially liked the description of happiness as the " mystical yearning craved by all." Well said! Best wishes in the contest!
Comment Written 27-Jan-2023
reply by the author on 27-Jan-2023
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Thank you for your supportive review.
Comment from Gypsy Blue Rose
Wonderful entry for Antonym Poem writing prompt contest.
Good selection of antonyms and matching section. The presentation is outstanding.
Good luck in the contest.
Gypsy
"The poet waits quietly to paint the unsaid." - Atticus
reply by the author on 27-Jan-2023
Wonderful entry for Antonym Poem writing prompt contest.
Good selection of antonyms and matching section. The presentation is outstanding.
Good luck in the contest.
Gypsy
"The poet waits quietly to paint the unsaid." - Atticus
Comment Written 27-Jan-2023
reply by the author on 27-Jan-2023
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Thank you for your supportive review.
Comment from jacquelyn popp
Good poem. I enjoyed reading it . Your words flowed well together and made for an easy and enjoyable read. This is true that at times happiness does elude us. Thank you for sharing.
reply by the author on 27-Jan-2023
Good poem. I enjoyed reading it . Your words flowed well together and made for an easy and enjoyable read. This is true that at times happiness does elude us. Thank you for sharing.
Comment Written 27-Jan-2023
reply by the author on 27-Jan-2023
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Thank you for reviewing my poem.
Comment from Rosemary Everson1
Like your poem. Gladness and sadness are opposite words. The colors do add a lot to the poem. Many times, if we feel glad about an incident, it later will turn sad because the incident is interpreted not the same way.
reply by the author on 27-Jan-2023
Like your poem. Gladness and sadness are opposite words. The colors do add a lot to the poem. Many times, if we feel glad about an incident, it later will turn sad because the incident is interpreted not the same way.
Comment Written 27-Jan-2023
reply by the author on 27-Jan-2023
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Thank you for your review. I agree with your comment.
Comment from AP Apgar
I like your poem- excellent picture presentation- matching the gist of the antithesis' poem- happy and sad- eluding human existence through out all times- the meaning contingent on one's geographical location - each with a unique perspective of what 'happiness' is - externally and internally- most relegated to fantasy and the pressure of social norms- whatever makes you boat float- it is what it is - and what we pretend it is- a mixture of sad and happy- good job AP
reply by the author on 27-Jan-2023
I like your poem- excellent picture presentation- matching the gist of the antithesis' poem- happy and sad- eluding human existence through out all times- the meaning contingent on one's geographical location - each with a unique perspective of what 'happiness' is - externally and internally- most relegated to fantasy and the pressure of social norms- whatever makes you boat float- it is what it is - and what we pretend it is- a mixture of sad and happy- good job AP
Comment Written 27-Jan-2023
reply by the author on 27-Jan-2023
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Thanks, Paul, for the review. Your reviews always make me think!
Comment from Jannypan (Jan)
Your presentation was well done, Mystery Author, I liked
the color scheme, the colored fonts, the image, and your
interpretation of the two words. Your poem was easy to
understand, too--even without notes.
Thanks for sharing and best wishes in the contest, Jan
reply by the author on 25-Jan-2023
Your presentation was well done, Mystery Author, I liked
the color scheme, the colored fonts, the image, and your
interpretation of the two words. Your poem was easy to
understand, too--even without notes.
Thanks for sharing and best wishes in the contest, Jan
Comment Written 25-Jan-2023
reply by the author on 25-Jan-2023
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Thank you, Jan, for your supportive review.
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
Happiness comes from within, it is created by ourselves and we cannot obtain happiness from anyone else. Life is to be enjoyed and so many people miss the simple pleasures of life, a fine write for the contest, love Dolly x
reply by the author on 25-Jan-2023
Happiness comes from within, it is created by ourselves and we cannot obtain happiness from anyone else. Life is to be enjoyed and so many people miss the simple pleasures of life, a fine write for the contest, love Dolly x
Comment Written 25-Jan-2023
reply by the author on 25-Jan-2023
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Thanks, Dolly, for your review.