Reviews from

The Best Time of Ohmie's Life

Viewing comments for Chapter 28 "Best Time of Ohmie's Life pt 28"
Dying of cancer, Ohmie learns his parents are spie

6 total reviews 
Comment from karenina
Excellent
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I think chapters like these are essential. It's important to balance action with broader perspective and reflection... I see I will have a lot of chapters to catch up on... But you hooked me once and now I'm invested! It'll take me a bit because I'm behind...

Ohmie is dying?

Oh no!

Karenina


 Comment Written 09-Dec-2022

reply by the author on 09-Dec-2022
    Yes, Ohmie is dying.
    Thank you for the review AND for the interest.
    I contend that there are Ohmies in every age and have written the same character as different people (somewhat)
    "Ohmie's Rough Years" is a stand-alone story. In it, he is involved with Rock-n-Roll music.
Comment from lyenochka
Excellent
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Seems like this chapter is more a telling of what's happening with Dad. In the movies, we would see a picture of a map and dotted lines showing different paths. I guess the drama is all in Ohmie's wonderings.

 Comment Written 06-Dec-2022

reply by the author on 06-Dec-2022
    Yes. I'm not author enough to do two first person narratives.
Comment from Ricky1024
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

This was another nice chapter.
Well written rich in theme and Imagery.
It also, read well and flowed well with no Grammar Issues
...
Complete Synopsis:
The Adjective and Objective Contents were both Excellent and Exceptional while Descriptive Measures Aligned Perfectly.
Doctor Ricky1024

 Comment Written 05-Dec-2022

reply by the author on 05-Dec-2022
    Thank you.
Comment from Wendy G
Excellent
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A fine chapter, explaining some of the backstory and some of the possibilities of what was happening with his father right then. Their task seems almost impossible. BUt theyll succeed, I am sure.
Wendy

 Comment Written 04-Dec-2022

reply by the author on 04-Dec-2022
    We hope so.
    Thank you for a very nice review.
    I worried about so little real action or interesting dialogue in this chapter.
reply by Wendy G on 04-Dec-2022
    It's fine as it is. The action needs to be balanced with reflections, just as you have done.
reply by the author on 04-Dec-2022
    Whew. I feel better. thank you.
Comment from Susan Newell
Excellent
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Wayne,

And so the plot thickens as we get closer and closer to resolution. The story fattens as Ohmie slims. Still doing a great job of writing in the quasi stream-of-(un)consciousness of a sick boy.

Sue

 Comment Written 04-Dec-2022

reply by the author on 04-Dec-2022
    Thank you. I was worried about this chapter, wanting Ohmie to jump up and kill somebody!
reply by Susan Newell on 04-Dec-2022
    :-)
Comment from Pam Lonsdale
Excellent
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Well, it seems that Ohmie may help his dad find Dortch and save the day before he passes. After all, this is about "Ohmie, the teenage spy."

Your statement on not being able to trust even those in power is spot-on in this day and age.

Keepin' the story moving, Wayne!

 Comment Written 04-Dec-2022

reply by the author on 04-Dec-2022
    Thank you. I had serious reservations about this non-dialogue chapter. After re-reading it I wanted to reach in and let Ohmie kill somebody.
reply by Pam Lonsdale on 04-Dec-2022
    Not you, I hope!