An Everyday Man
Narrative Poem about a Simple Man~28 total reviews
Comment from jake cosmos aller
love this version for the contest. you nailed it. YOu got my vote.
I have a blog, "the world according to cosmos" and a podcast on Spotify and elsewhere, and would love to feature your work as a guest poet. I have made this offer to others on Fan Story and writing com whose work I admire. If interested, send me five poems, a bio, photos and links to social media etc. Once I post it I will send you a link. I have about 5,000 followers now.
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2022
love this version for the contest. you nailed it. YOu got my vote.
I have a blog, "the world according to cosmos" and a podcast on Spotify and elsewhere, and would love to feature your work as a guest poet. I have made this offer to others on Fan Story and writing com whose work I admire. If interested, send me five poems, a bio, photos and links to social media etc. Once I post it I will send you a link. I have about 5,000 followers now.
Comment Written 30-Nov-2022
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2022
-
Thank you for this great review. After the contest closes, I will reach out to you. Thanks, for the offer.
Comment from susand3022
Hello Author,
I enjoyed this Phrase Maze tremendously. I did find a couple of little things for you to fix.
Watch your plurals!
... his (Mom) Beulah's house...
... shows that (remind) him...
This was a really fun read :)
Susan :)
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2022
Hello Author,
I enjoyed this Phrase Maze tremendously. I did find a couple of little things for you to fix.
Watch your plurals!
... his (Mom) Beulah's house...
... shows that (remind) him...
This was a really fun read :)
Susan :)
Comment Written 30-Nov-2022
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2022
-
Thank you for the review and for catching those errors I will correct them now. Your input is appreciated.
Comment from AP Apgar
I like your narrative poem- good job getting all the challenge words in- excellent story about Mark! Sounds pretty settled in his way of life - working perfectly for him - good coping skills! Poem flows well painting vivid details I can relate to - worked at a 'Mel's type gas station - side job going to Jr college- He an I would have gotten along well - trust worthy- excellent job. AP
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2022
I like your narrative poem- good job getting all the challenge words in- excellent story about Mark! Sounds pretty settled in his way of life - working perfectly for him - good coping skills! Poem flows well painting vivid details I can relate to - worked at a 'Mel's type gas station - side job going to Jr college- He an I would have gotten along well - trust worthy- excellent job. AP
Comment Written 30-Nov-2022
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2022
-
Yes, I too like salt of the earth people. They are mostly good hardworking folks. Thanks for the review.
Comment from Pam Lonsdale
This is only the second narrative poem I've ever seen on this site (mine was the other one), but it certainly was the right fit for this writing prompt. I really enjoyed reading about this everyday man, who "doesn't feel the need to be anything else." Awesome job:-)
On the "slime time" line, do you want the period at the end of the line?
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2022
This is only the second narrative poem I've ever seen on this site (mine was the other one), but it certainly was the right fit for this writing prompt. I really enjoyed reading about this everyday man, who "doesn't feel the need to be anything else." Awesome job:-)
On the "slime time" line, do you want the period at the end of the line?
Comment Written 30-Nov-2022
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2022
-
Thank you for catching that punctuation error. No one else did. I appreciate your review. As for narrative poems my portfolio is full of them. The narrative poem as you may know is the oldest poetry form, stemming from the oral tradition. People in the past thought that was the best way to remember information.
Comment from Thomas Blanks
This narrative poem used all of the required words for the prompt. While rhyming poems seem to have gone out of style, I have a preference for them. I guess I am a dinosaur.
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2022
This narrative poem used all of the required words for the prompt. While rhyming poems seem to have gone out of style, I have a preference for them. I guess I am a dinosaur.
Comment Written 30-Nov-2022
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2022
-
Well, Mr. Blanks you probably will not get many from me. I have written for the past 50 years only free verse. Rhyming poems one must worry about meter, rhyming scheme...etc.
I appreciate your review.
Comment from Aussie
A picture of a shy guy who wants to be left alone. There's nothing wrong with solitude; never join the herd, one sheep jumps and the rest follow. Be yourself, simple, kind and understanding. Angels whisper to a man when he goes out walking. Loved your poem. K xx
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2022
A picture of a shy guy who wants to be left alone. There's nothing wrong with solitude; never join the herd, one sheep jumps and the rest follow. Be yourself, simple, kind and understanding. Angels whisper to a man when he goes out walking. Loved your poem. K xx
Comment Written 30-Nov-2022
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2022
-
Thank you, Aussie, for your comments and exceptional rating. Both are appreciated.
Comment from Shirley E Kennedy
A fine example of writing to a set prompt and succeeding with flair.
All required words are included and tell a free flowing tale of a simple working class man.
Blessings
Shirley
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2022
A fine example of writing to a set prompt and succeeding with flair.
All required words are included and tell a free flowing tale of a simple working class man.
Blessings
Shirley
Comment Written 30-Nov-2022
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2022
-
Thank you for this great review. I burned some brain cells in the process. lol
Comment from Wendy G
Well done. In your story/poem of this "everyday man" you have smoothly incorporated all the required expressions in a pertinant and meaningful way. Best wishes for your entry in the contest.
Wendy
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2022
Well done. In your story/poem of this "everyday man" you have smoothly incorporated all the required expressions in a pertinant and meaningful way. Best wishes for your entry in the contest.
Wendy
Comment Written 29-Nov-2022
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2022
-
Thank you, Wendy, for your review.
Comment from Janet Foor
Congratulations on posting you 100th poem which was fun to read.
It was LOL funny. You did s great job with the phrase maze and I enjoyed the story about a "simple man."
Well done
Blessings
Janet
reply by the author on 29-Nov-2022
Congratulations on posting you 100th poem which was fun to read.
It was LOL funny. You did s great job with the phrase maze and I enjoyed the story about a "simple man."
Well done
Blessings
Janet
Comment Written 29-Nov-2022
reply by the author on 29-Nov-2022
-
Thanks, Janet for your review. It was a tough contest. I fried a few brain cells. LOL
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
This man is not very adventurous and slightly anti-social and no wonder he does not have woman in his life with grease under his fingernails, yuk! He seems lazy and uninteresting and I think the average man in this street would easily compete with this uncomplicated but boring individual, I enjoyed your descriptions and wish you luck with the contest, love Dolly x
reply by the author on 29-Nov-2022
This man is not very adventurous and slightly anti-social and no wonder he does not have woman in his life with grease under his fingernails, yuk! He seems lazy and uninteresting and I think the average man in this street would easily compete with this uncomplicated but boring individual, I enjoyed your descriptions and wish you luck with the contest, love Dolly x
Comment Written 29-Nov-2022
reply by the author on 29-Nov-2022
-
Well, Dolly please say what you mean. LOL I admit the man I described would not hold my interest, but there are many like him in the world. Most are decent people. Thanks for your review.
-
Sorry about my blunt review, but this guy is a hapless sort, ha ha ha, there are many about and they are on my dating site!
-
Don't ever be sorry speaking your truth. I thought it was funny, and it was a backhand compliment that I had written such a realistic character. I'm a truth teller, and I admire people who are also that way. No apology ever needed Ms. Dolly.