Lords Of The Glen
Viewing comments for Chapter 17 "Another King's Head Falls"A A new threat arises to the north.
2 total reviews
Comment from barbara.wilkey
This is a very good read and it well written. My only suggestion is to remove the word 'that' where it's not needed, sometimes it's needed for clarity but often it's an extra word.
He had no doubt that they would drive the enemy back a second day. & Your walls are thicker, and Gilead was built for war, so there's a chance that your siege may long outlast your supplies. & He could not hear them, but could tell that they were arguing. (remove 'that' from each of these sentences, there's a few more sentences where 'that' needs to be removed)
reply by the author on 27-Nov-2022
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This is a very good read and it well written. My only suggestion is to remove the word 'that' where it's not needed, sometimes it's needed for clarity but often it's an extra word.
He had no doubt that they would drive the enemy back a second day. & Your walls are thicker, and Gilead was built for war, so there's a chance that your siege may long outlast your supplies. & He could not hear them, but could tell that they were arguing. (remove 'that' from each of these sentences, there's a few more sentences where 'that' needs to be removed)
Comment Written 22-Nov-2022
reply by the author on 27-Nov-2022
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Sorry for the delay Holidays and all. Thank you so much for this most helpful review! I appreciate you!
Comment from wierdgrace
I love Fantasy, and Science fiction, and stories with dragons, this is great, I will be bookcase this so I can read more, I am in the process of publishing my fifth book, so don't read to much as I don't want to pick up something while my brain is flowing, and my fingers are writing, but I will finish this book.
reply by the author on 22-Nov-2022
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I love Fantasy, and Science fiction, and stories with dragons, this is great, I will be bookcase this so I can read more, I am in the process of publishing my fifth book, so don't read to much as I don't want to pick up something while my brain is flowing, and my fingers are writing, but I will finish this book.
Comment Written 22-Nov-2022
reply by the author on 22-Nov-2022
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Thank you! It is a work in progress.
