My Garden is Good
A garden is Truth. I am surrounded by it each day.16 total reviews
Comment from Wendy G
I love your story, and I can see that you must be a fellow Aussie! You described your garden and feelings and emotions beautifully. I fully identified and could visualise everything perfectly! Same situation in my garden.
Wendy
Just a couple of punctuation errors e.g. Move your comma back next to the word "least" then leave a space after the comma, in the following sentence:
"Willy is the boss, for now at least ,and takes a position of authority ...."
should be "Willy is the boss, for now at least, and takes a position of authority ...."
reply by the author on 11-Nov-2022
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I love your story, and I can see that you must be a fellow Aussie! You described your garden and feelings and emotions beautifully. I fully identified and could visualise everything perfectly! Same situation in my garden.
Wendy
Just a couple of punctuation errors e.g. Move your comma back next to the word "least" then leave a space after the comma, in the following sentence:
"Willy is the boss, for now at least ,and takes a position of authority ...."
should be "Willy is the boss, for now at least, and takes a position of authority ...."
Comment Written 11-Nov-2022
reply by the author on 11-Nov-2022
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Wendy,
Yes a fellow Aussie I am. Living in Nowra on the New South Wales South Coast. Glad you are a garden person as well. Thanks for reading and reviewing my story. Also thanks for your punctuation suggestion. Much appreciated.
Keep writing and have a great day.
Regards
Barry
Comment from irishauthorme
Ah, Barry, I looked up the lorikeets, and deduced that you live in Australia. I visited your country courtesy of the US Navy, received a hearty welcome, and had a great time. Best beer I have ever drank.
However: While I live in the state of Wyoming, USDA Zone 4b, four months at the most, growing season, still have a great garden. Six varieties of Tomatoes, zucchinis, four kinds of squash, watermelons, pumpkins, eggplants, and two kinds of cucumbers, eating, and pickling. Six kinds of peppers. Started Horseradish three years ago and it's spread, got a lot this year. Start everything early in the hothouse and set the plants out when the frost is gone, but this year had a late frost, lost everything, and had to go buy plants. $$$.
Really enjoy the garden, it's a kind of therapy, and I feel at peace there.
Have your kind of battle with weeds.
Enjoyed your writing!
irish
reply by the author on 10-Nov-2022
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Ah, Barry, I looked up the lorikeets, and deduced that you live in Australia. I visited your country courtesy of the US Navy, received a hearty welcome, and had a great time. Best beer I have ever drank.
However: While I live in the state of Wyoming, USDA Zone 4b, four months at the most, growing season, still have a great garden. Six varieties of Tomatoes, zucchinis, four kinds of squash, watermelons, pumpkins, eggplants, and two kinds of cucumbers, eating, and pickling. Six kinds of peppers. Started Horseradish three years ago and it's spread, got a lot this year. Start everything early in the hothouse and set the plants out when the frost is gone, but this year had a late frost, lost everything, and had to go buy plants. $$$.
Really enjoy the garden, it's a kind of therapy, and I feel at peace there.
Have your kind of battle with weeds.
Enjoyed your writing!
irish
Comment Written 10-Nov-2022
reply by the author on 10-Nov-2022
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Well yes I am an Aussie and I do like a drink of beer. Thanks fortaking the time to read and review my story. Glad you enjoyed it. Boy you certainly normally have a stock of great vegetables. We are lucky here as it is very temperate near the coast. Rarely have a frost. Yes I enjoy the garden as you no doubt can tell from my story.
Weeds are always appearing but I do the best I can.
Have a great day.
Cheers
Barry Penfold
Comment from barbara.wilkey
I enjoyed reading your contest entry. You have a very good entry on your hands, but you need to keep an eye on your punctuation. Good luck with the contest.
was just there.A part of the natural scene. (space needed after the period)
My garden is not perfect . & A work in progress . (space deleted before the period)
The noise quickly reaches a crescendo and for a brief moment I am annoyed."Shut up" I say in a half-hearted tone. (space needed after the period & comma needed after 'up')
oblivious to the size difference, and clearly stating "Out of here bud". The magpie leaves (comma needed after 'stating' & period goes before the quotation marks)
The morning sun warms a small rectangular concrete pad and I instantly feel the warmth. (comma needed after 'pad' you switched subjects)
The noise of the world and its stretching of the truth and downright lies mean nothing .Threats of war, hunger and Armageddon are gobbled up like a fresh, iced Krispy Kreme. (space deleted before the period but you need a space before 'Threats')
reply by the author on 10-Nov-2022
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I enjoyed reading your contest entry. You have a very good entry on your hands, but you need to keep an eye on your punctuation. Good luck with the contest.
was just there.A part of the natural scene. (space needed after the period)
My garden is not perfect . & A work in progress . (space deleted before the period)
The noise quickly reaches a crescendo and for a brief moment I am annoyed."Shut up" I say in a half-hearted tone. (space needed after the period & comma needed after 'up')
oblivious to the size difference, and clearly stating "Out of here bud". The magpie leaves (comma needed after 'stating' & period goes before the quotation marks)
The morning sun warms a small rectangular concrete pad and I instantly feel the warmth. (comma needed after 'pad' you switched subjects)
The noise of the world and its stretching of the truth and downright lies mean nothing .Threats of war, hunger and Armageddon are gobbled up like a fresh, iced Krispy Kreme. (space deleted before the period but you need a space before 'Threats')
Comment Written 10-Nov-2022
reply by the author on 10-Nov-2022
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Barbara,
Thanks for reviewing my story. Love you suggestions as to punctuation which I have followed thanks very much. I hope you have a great day and please take care.
Regards
Barry Penfold.
Comment from royowen
The bottle brush suggests you might be an Aussie Barry, although I'm no expert on floral adornments, but yes, with all the bonus rain we've received this year, the garden (plus weed) are looking good, but they are dying off now, but the welckme ones are doing well. Beautifully written my friend, it brought a sense of peace, well done, blessings Roy
reply by the author on 10-Nov-2022
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The bottle brush suggests you might be an Aussie Barry, although I'm no expert on floral adornments, but yes, with all the bonus rain we've received this year, the garden (plus weed) are looking good, but they are dying off now, but the welckme ones are doing well. Beautifully written my friend, it brought a sense of peace, well done, blessings Roy
Comment Written 10-Nov-2022
reply by the author on 10-Nov-2022
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Roy, thanks for your review. Yes a garden does bring a sense of peace to many and it is always a true reflection of nature. We sure do need more truth in the world.
God Bless your family and take care. Your writing as always is excellent.
Oh, and yes an Aussie I am. Live at Nowra in New Sought Wales.
Cheers
Barry Penfold.
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You certainly are Barry
Comment from Wayne Fowler
Very nice showing of a very nice garden, and day.
Not of the wand waving kind, - maybe (wand-waving)?
but of a peace. A well being. - I understand why you punctuated like this, but a comma after 'peace' would work as well - and not draw unwanted attention.
mean nothing .Threats - spacing oopsie
fresh iced Krispy Kreme - comma after 'fresh'
Good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 10-Nov-2022
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Very nice showing of a very nice garden, and day.
Not of the wand waving kind, - maybe (wand-waving)?
but of a peace. A well being. - I understand why you punctuated like this, but a comma after 'peace' would work as well - and not draw unwanted attention.
mean nothing .Threats - spacing oopsie
fresh iced Krispy Kreme - comma after 'fresh'
Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 10-Nov-2022
reply by the author on 10-Nov-2022
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Wayne,
Thanks so much for taking the time to read and review my story. Also, thanks for providing your suggestions as to corrections and improvements. It proves invaluable to completing my final work. I hav followed all but one of your suggestions. I have left wand waving as it is.
Hope you have a great day.
Barry Penfold.
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I think wand waving is fine. It's just that that is what reviewers point out in my writing. We'll simply call it style. lol
Comment from Jannypan (Jan)
You did a great job, Barry, with your contest entry. I enjoyed
reading it. The many examples of the plants and the activities
of the critters that visit were awesome. Your words were smooth
to read and moved at a pleasing pace. I agree with your true
advice. One's garden is a refuge and a place to be near nature
and God.
Thanks for sharing and best wishes in the contest, Jan
reply by the author on 10-Nov-2022
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You did a great job, Barry, with your contest entry. I enjoyed
reading it. The many examples of the plants and the activities
of the critters that visit were awesome. Your words were smooth
to read and moved at a pleasing pace. I agree with your true
advice. One's garden is a refuge and a place to be near nature
and God.
Thanks for sharing and best wishes in the contest, Jan
Comment Written 09-Nov-2022
reply by the author on 10-Nov-2022
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Thanks Jan. Yes my garden is a refuge and it is often so helpfule just to sit within it and let all the negativity in the world drain out of you. Nature has a wonderfule teaching and healing power, if we only watch and listen. Take Care and thanks again.
Regards
Barry Penfold
Comment from Douglas Goff
This is beautifully written. So very nicely done.
This is a 98 word paragraph that could easily be cut in two:
I stroll to the backyard and the waft of lavender greets. A large magpie struts through yesterday`s cut grass. Worms and dead insects abound so the magpie will feast. But nothing is easy in nature, as the ever persistent and annoying Willy Wag Tail arrives. Chattering and approaching the magpie, oblivious to the size difference, and clearly stating "Out of here bud". The magpie leaves .
Willy is the boss, for now at least ,and takes a position of authority atop a garden post. A sparrow arrives and balances on the rim of a dog dish come bird bath.
Just my two cents.
Regardless, this writing is fabulous! Thanks for sharing!
reply by the author on 10-Nov-2022
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This is beautifully written. So very nicely done.
This is a 98 word paragraph that could easily be cut in two:
I stroll to the backyard and the waft of lavender greets. A large magpie struts through yesterday`s cut grass. Worms and dead insects abound so the magpie will feast. But nothing is easy in nature, as the ever persistent and annoying Willy Wag Tail arrives. Chattering and approaching the magpie, oblivious to the size difference, and clearly stating "Out of here bud". The magpie leaves .
Willy is the boss, for now at least ,and takes a position of authority atop a garden post. A sparrow arrives and balances on the rim of a dog dish come bird bath.
Just my two cents.
Regardless, this writing is fabulous! Thanks for sharing!
Comment Written 09-Nov-2022
reply by the author on 10-Nov-2022
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Doug,
Thanks so much for taking the time to read and review my story. Glad you enjoyed it. Also, I did take on your suggestion about the 98 word paragraph and broke it into two. Thanks.
I see you won the Newbie Flash Fiction contest. Well done. I won the previous years contest. WE have something in common.
I trust you will continue to enjoy writing and being part of the fan story community. Have a great day and take care.
Cheers
Barry Penfold.
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Thanks! I enjoy your work!
Comment from JoannaN
Carpe diem :) Your story reminds me of how nice the life can be. Your story is very suggestive, we can clearly imagine this lovely garden and it's scent, sounds and colors.
reply by the author on 10-Nov-2022
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Carpe diem :) Your story reminds me of how nice the life can be. Your story is very suggestive, we can clearly imagine this lovely garden and it's scent, sounds and colors.
Comment Written 09-Nov-2022
reply by the author on 10-Nov-2022
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Joanna,
Thanks for taking the time to read and review my story. Glad you enjoyed it. Yes gardens can present an oasis in our rather crazy world. Take care.
Barry Penfold.
Comment from Sarah Robin
I loved this post. Reading it put me in a relaxed mood! You have done a great job with writing. Your words allowed me to experience the bird songs and the colorful flowers. Thanks for sharing this story with us. Sarah
reply by the author on 10-Nov-2022
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I loved this post. Reading it put me in a relaxed mood! You have done a great job with writing. Your words allowed me to experience the bird songs and the colorful flowers. Thanks for sharing this story with us. Sarah
Comment Written 09-Nov-2022
reply by the author on 10-Nov-2022
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Sarah,
Thanks so much for taking the time to read and review my story. Glad you enjoyed it. Gardens can be an oasis in what is a crazy world most of the time.
Enjoy your day and take care.
Barry Penfold.
Comment from Bill Schott
This story, My Garden is Good, brings the readers into this sanctuary from the world. There are a million deeds done and million stories old there. This scene makes them all secondary.
reply by the author on 10-Nov-2022
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This story, My Garden is Good, brings the readers into this sanctuary from the world. There are a million deeds done and million stories old there. This scene makes them all secondary.
Comment Written 09-Nov-2022
reply by the author on 10-Nov-2022
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Bill,
Thanks for taking the time to read and review my story. Gardens are an oasis in a crazy world. Keep safe and have a great day.
Cheers
Barry Penfold.
