Reviews from

Too hard!

Little girl lost

11 total reviews 
Comment from lyenochka
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Oh how exhausting! I was exhausted with worry with the way you wrote this. I followed your entire trail of worries that went from possible scary to really scary! Congratulations on the win!!


 Comment Written 29-Oct-2022


reply by the author on 29-Oct-2022
    Thanks so much Helen! I fictionalised it a bit, but it was based on a real story with Emmeline. And it even scared me again as I relived it!
    Thanks for your congratulations too. I love the happy dance!
    Wendy
Comment from LJbutterfly
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I love this realistic story. I know how it feels to think you've lost a child. I could understand the panic felt when every nook and granny was searched twice and the child was not found. Your mind goes into overdrive. Congratulations on winning the contest. It is well deserved.

 Comment Written 28-Oct-2022


reply by the author on 28-Oct-2022
    Thank you very much, both for reviewing so positively and for the congratulations.
    Yes, you?re right. Your mind can?t think straight in the panic of the moment. As you can tell, this is a fictionalised version of a real experience.
    Wendy
Comment from Sandra Nelms-Ludwig
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

This is a well-written Lost-Fiction Flash entry. The text is a great size. The plot moves at a great pace. I was anxious for this fictional grandma. I wanted her to find this almost non-verbal, chubby armed, three-year-old too. Now, that's the sign it is a well-written story. The reader is nervous too. The visual is adorable and fits perfectly. Good luck in the contest.
I had to give it a six!!

 Comment Written 26-Oct-2022


reply by the author on 26-Oct-2022
    Hi Sandra - thank you so much for this generous and special rating! Such a lovely review too - I appreciate every word.
reply by Sandra Nelms-Ludwig on 27-Oct-2022
    You are welcome. It was a good read.
Comment from Charlotte Morse
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Oh my, I know that feeling so well! My son was a wanderer and would slip away unnoticed the minute I took a phone call, or got too involved with some task, or just I wasn't looking. Luckily I learnt early on that my dogs would always follow him, so I would call them to see from which direction they appeared and know to go that way.

But isn't that the most terrifying feeling!

You've written your story well, keeping the reader interested all the way through - and nearly as relieved as you were, when she's found!

Good luck with the contest, you've got my vote! :-)

 Comment Written 26-Oct-2022


reply by the author on 26-Oct-2022
    Thank you Charlotte. You understand perfectly! A very encouraging review, and many thanks for your vote.
Comment from Kaiku
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Oh boy, I have had this happen on more than one occasion. It is frightening. Nice job in relaying the message and the heartbeat. I don't believe there is anything worse.

 Comment Written 26-Oct-2022


reply by the author on 26-Oct-2022
    Thank you so much! Your review shows you understand perfectly!
Comment from Katherine M. (k-11)
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

This is excellent. Astonishing how different tinies find different things hard. I am fascinated by late speakers, and would be delighted to learn what the trigger was that unblocked the silence in your case. Kate xx

 Comment Written 26-Oct-2022


reply by the author on 26-Oct-2022
    Thank you Kate. Super review. Her older sister was talking like an adult at two, and I think knew what she wanted and anticipated her needs, spoke for her etc. I think she drew people?s attention by not speaking, and I think everyone trying to encourage her to speak made her feel important too. Hence elective mute. Interestingly once she started, she could almost immediately speak in full sentences with multi-syllable words. She started talking at three and a half after her sister started "big school". Interestingly she is left-handed, writes her name from right to left, and draws pictures upside down and mirror image so that they are right for someone sitting across the table from her. She?s now 4. Thanks for your great comments and your interest.
Comment from Midi O'Rourke
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I agree. Too hard! Well written. It flows well and the repetition of chubby little arms is a great device. I could feel the genuine well warranted panic. Very scary thought to lose a child.

 Comment Written 25-Oct-2022


reply by the author on 26-Oct-2022
    Thank you very much Midi. I appreciate your thoughtful review a lot.
Comment from GWHARGIS
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

By the time you got to the part about the front door being unlocked, my heart was in my throat. I lost my four year old daughter once. She was under my bed, having fallen asleep. I remember how the old imagination just kicks into overdrive. Great lost story. Good luck in the contest. Gretchen

 Comment Written 25-Oct-2022


reply by the author on 25-Oct-2022
    Thank you Gretchen. I am sure this will relate to many readers who have had similar anxiety-producing situations. Lovely review.
Comment from Bill Schott
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

This story, Too Hard, had me going all the way through hoping that the girl was indeed just hiding. This was well paced and took me around the yard looking for the girl with no name. With no name, she could have been my granddaughter. Well done with this.

This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.

 Comment Written 25-Oct-2022


reply by the author on 25-Oct-2022
    Thanks so much Bill. I love your review. Yes, I purposely didn't name her, because I thought we could each probably put a name to her, out of a similar experience!
Comment from RodG
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

This story hooked me from the very first sentence and kept me scurrying through words to the end. A great job of characterizing the child and building the suspense. We can easily see the narrator panicking as the search goes on. Not a word is wasted. This should do very well in the contest.
Rod

 Comment Written 24-Oct-2022


reply by the author on 25-Oct-2022
    Thank you very much Rod! Great review! I also am very thankful for the honour of six stars.
reply by RodG on 25-Oct-2022
    My pleasure.