Artisanal Branches
My tree of poetic faith44 total reviews
Comment from Jasmine Girl
I'm not a Christian but a fervent believer of art and literature. I do understand your kind of faith, the poetic faith that is expressed by nature and trees. You are not not writing a particular type of poetry so I don't understand your using of contractions in "t'ward."
Well done.
reply by the author on 24-Aug-2022
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I'm not a Christian but a fervent believer of art and literature. I do understand your kind of faith, the poetic faith that is expressed by nature and trees. You are not not writing a particular type of poetry so I don't understand your using of contractions in "t'ward."
Well done.
Comment Written 22-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 24-Aug-2022
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Thank you :-). I was hoping to show that, as you say, faith can exist without a deity - it just needs to be something worth believing in. Although I wasn't writing to a form, I did want to keep it in meter (albeit varying) so the contractions felt appropriate.
Mike
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I see. That's good. I took two meter classes from Jim Bartlette at FS.
Comment from Jay Squires
I'm no poet. I wish I were. I wish I had the tools and the poet's vocabulary to tell you with precision why the first and the last two stanzas struck such a chord that I'm vibrating still under their power.
I would also tell you, without being able to tell you why or how, that the last word in the line "I stumble t'ward impressions" pushes me off the ledge with its ending "yuns" sound -- which to me needed to end with a "lift" as did virtually every other line. (See, I'm making a muddle of this, like a car mechanic trying to describe a ballet move.)
Yet, clearly I am wrong anyway. The final word of the second stanza contains a similar "dropping off" and yet it works ... to my mind.
Overall, Mike, your poem is brilliantly messaged and written. I hope you do as well in the contest as I feel you deserve. It so far exceeds much of the pap I've read here on the subject of faith, and it's one of the best of yours on any subject that I've read.
Jay
reply by the author on 24-Aug-2022
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I'm no poet. I wish I were. I wish I had the tools and the poet's vocabulary to tell you with precision why the first and the last two stanzas struck such a chord that I'm vibrating still under their power.
I would also tell you, without being able to tell you why or how, that the last word in the line "I stumble t'ward impressions" pushes me off the ledge with its ending "yuns" sound -- which to me needed to end with a "lift" as did virtually every other line. (See, I'm making a muddle of this, like a car mechanic trying to describe a ballet move.)
Yet, clearly I am wrong anyway. The final word of the second stanza contains a similar "dropping off" and yet it works ... to my mind.
Overall, Mike, your poem is brilliantly messaged and written. I hope you do as well in the contest as I feel you deserve. It so far exceeds much of the pap I've read here on the subject of faith, and it's one of the best of yours on any subject that I've read.
Jay
Comment Written 22-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 24-Aug-2022
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Jay, thanks so much for this thoughtful and detailed response. There's no wrong - especially in poetry. If something gave you pause for a feeling or rhythm reason, it's good to know. I write about 80% on instinct, so it can be both difficult and exciting to know how it comes across to readers. I usually avoid faith (as you've probably noticed) because it doesn't mean to me what many on site would assume, but I was feeling the need to express and this is what came out!
Mike
Comment from Donna G. (aka Sam Duck)
How amazing! I've never thought about faith like this before. I love words, I love learning, I love art.
"to grow my tree upon my back,
an everlasting tome of truth
in rings and branches, epic proof
that words can be a world."
This is inspired! This is Truth! Great work.
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reply by the author on 24-Aug-2022
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How amazing! I've never thought about faith like this before. I love words, I love learning, I love art.
"to grow my tree upon my back,
an everlasting tome of truth
in rings and branches, epic proof
that words can be a world."
This is inspired! This is Truth! Great work.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 22-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 24-Aug-2022
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Thanks so much, Donna :-). I'm thrilled with your response and that I was able to connect.
Mike
Comment from GARY MACLEAN
I like your philosophy. With that thought in mind I can expect to strive to understand myself for years yet to come, because I ain't there yet. Got a long way to go.
Nicely worded, philosophical glance at one man's view, which is every man's reality.
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reply by the author on 24-Aug-2022
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I like your philosophy. With that thought in mind I can expect to strive to understand myself for years yet to come, because I ain't there yet. Got a long way to go.
Nicely worded, philosophical glance at one man's view, which is every man's reality.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 22-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 24-Aug-2022
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Thanks, Gary :-). I was hoping to express my feelings on faith without excluding others, so hopefully that came across. I had a need sitting behind this one - a feeling I had to slake.
Mike
