Tanka Collection
Viewing comments for Chapter 31 "Cabin by Bleak Lake"Romantic Tanka Poems
9 total reviews
Comment from Mark Schardine
The moment before giving up hope can create more sorrow and regret than any other moment. Soon enough, both persons may regret the failure to bring life back in to the relationship.
reply by the author on 17-Aug-2022
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The moment before giving up hope can create more sorrow and regret than any other moment. Soon enough, both persons may regret the failure to bring life back in to the relationship.
Comment Written 17-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 17-Aug-2022
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Thank you very much, Mark.
Gypsy
Comment from LateBloomer
Hello Gypsy, those last-chance efforts can be very sad.
Your poem says it all, especially:
we rake
dying amber embers
in the feeble fireplace
(Very sad. All hope is gone, even the feeble fireplace knows it.
Good alliteration - feeble fireplace)
Well-chosen photo. Keep the blue waters flowing. Margaret ~ LB
reply by the author on 16-Aug-2022
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Hello Gypsy, those last-chance efforts can be very sad.
Your poem says it all, especially:
we rake
dying amber embers
in the feeble fireplace
(Very sad. All hope is gone, even the feeble fireplace knows it.
Good alliteration - feeble fireplace)
Well-chosen photo. Keep the blue waters flowing. Margaret ~ LB
Comment Written 16-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 16-Aug-2022
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Thank you, Margaret. I am grateful your kind and helpful review.
Gypsy hugs (*<>*)
Comment from Mike Stevens
Another fine poem, Gypsy----and, "We rake the dying embers in the feeble fireplace," is a perfect description of what the end of a marrige feels like, as I know all-too well
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2022
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Another fine poem, Gypsy----and, "We rake the dying embers in the feeble fireplace," is a perfect description of what the end of a marrige feels like, as I know all-too well
Comment Written 14-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2022
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Thank you very much for your time and kind review.
Gypsy
"Poetry heals the wounds inflicted by reason". --Novalis
Comment from Fei Ma
Very interesting to read how a fireplace and a marriage become related by the author in this poem, actually to save a marriage. It sounds like it does not work out.
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2022
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Very interesting to read how a fireplace and a marriage become related by the author in this poem, actually to save a marriage. It sounds like it does not work out.
Comment Written 14-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2022
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Thank you very much for your exceptional six stars kind review.
Gypsy
"Poetry heals the wounds inflicted by reason". --Novalis
Comment from Jasmine Girl
I'm not sure this will save a marriage, but I like the images. I like your use of words like "amble" and "feeble" as metaphor for this marriage that needs fire.
Well done.
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2022
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I'm not sure this will save a marriage, but I like the images. I like your use of words like "amble" and "feeble" as metaphor for this marriage that needs fire.
Well done.
Comment Written 13-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2022
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Thank you very much for your time and kind review.
Gypsy
"Poetry heals the wounds inflicted by reason". --Novalis
Comment from lyenochka
I like the "feeble fireplace" that symbolizes the weakness of the passions left in the couple's hearts. I guess it may take more than raking the embers to rekindle the flame.
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2022
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I like the "feeble fireplace" that symbolizes the weakness of the passions left in the couple's hearts. I guess it may take more than raking the embers to rekindle the flame.
Comment Written 13-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2022
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Thank you very much Helen. I hope you had a good weekend. Remember to be kind to yourse.
MariVal
"Poetry heals the wounds inflicted by reason". --Novalis
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You, too! 💖
Comment from aryr
This was a great tanka, Gypsy. I loved the before picture and the after picture. I can only imagine trying to save a dying marriage, it would definitely take a cabin on Lake Bleak. Time alone, time to talk and work things out. Blessed be n hugs!
reply by the author on 13-Aug-2022
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This was a great tanka, Gypsy. I loved the before picture and the after picture. I can only imagine trying to save a dying marriage, it would definitely take a cabin on Lake Bleak. Time alone, time to talk and work things out. Blessed be n hugs!
Comment Written 13-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 13-Aug-2022
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Aryr, thank you very much, my friend. Yes, it's about a dying marriage. Blessed be and hugs!
Gypsy {*+*}
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Most welcome, Gypsy. Blessed be n hugs!
Comment from Janice Canerdy
Your modern tanka is excellent--vividly descriptive, expressive, and moving in its message about trying to save a marriage. There are somewhat mixed symbols (intentional, I'm sure)--embers and feeble,
uncertainty, . . . .
reply by the author on 13-Aug-2022
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Your modern tanka is excellent--vividly descriptive, expressive, and moving in its message about trying to save a marriage. There are somewhat mixed symbols (intentional, I'm sure)--embers and feeble,
uncertainty, . . . .
Comment Written 13-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 13-Aug-2022
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Thank you very much, my friend. I appreciate that you took the time to read and review my poem. Yes, I used metaphor to describe the end (dying) of a relationship.
Gypsy {*+*}
Comment from royowen
I love this tanka, you always add so much to a modern haiku or tanka Gypsy. It's funny how relationships can cool, and stoking up the embers can be some task, beautifully written Gypsy, blessings Roy
reply by the author on 13-Aug-2022
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I love this tanka, you always add so much to a modern haiku or tanka Gypsy. It's funny how relationships can cool, and stoking up the embers can be some task, beautifully written Gypsy, blessings Roy
Comment Written 13-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 13-Aug-2022
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Roy, tank you very much, my friend. I appreciate that you took the time to read and review my poem.
Gypsy {*+*}
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Well done