Comment from Pearl Edwards

Excellent

I enjoyed your horror story in a poem Ricky1024 about the town where young teenage boys went missing. A parents nightmare. I smiled at the descriptions of the easy going children suddenly becoming the sullen teens, been there. Just one typo
I'm do (so) sorry.
Cheers

 Comment Written 17-Aug-2022

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reply by the author on 18-Aug-2022

This was rewritten and leading into the second chapter.
(which I'll present later today) I'm still working on it within my head!
Doctor Ricky

Comment from C. Gale Burnett

Excellent

Ricky, you've got me creeped out on this one, and that's the point, isn't it? That dream would cause anyone a nightmare, but I understand how much tougher it would be for you.

SUGGESTION: Look at the next to the last stanza at the last 2 lines where you've typed, 'I'm do sorry!' and change it to 'I'm so sorry!'. Just an oversight I know.

Thanks bunches for sharing this, Ricky.
Gale

 Comment Written 17-Aug-2022

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reply by the author on 18-Aug-2022

This is already been rewritten and leading into the second chapter.
That is still being developed within my head!
You got to remember I'm not a younger right or I'm going on 68!!
We all heard it a word dementia?
Doctor Ricky 1024
"Still Preaching the Choir here at Fanstory?"

Comment from Sanku

Excellent

This is a very interesting poem .You are un ravelling a thrilling mystery via a series of poems . i hope nothing disastrous is happening and they all come back fine...

 Comment Written 15-Aug-2022

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reply by the author on 15-Aug-2022

This is what I call having fun while on the toilet!
Thanks for reviewing!
Doctor Ricky 1024