Curse of the Cane Man
It's time for people to start disappearing again.2 total reviews
Comment from lancellot
This is actually a complete and well crafted story. We don't see that much anymore. I don't think there is any real editing or composition issues. It is a bit dialogue heavy but that may be style. I would suggest increasing the font size by two.
Good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 16-Jul-2022
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This is actually a complete and well crafted story. We don't see that much anymore. I don't think there is any real editing or composition issues. It is a bit dialogue heavy but that may be style. I would suggest increasing the font size by two.
Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 16-Jul-2022
reply by the author on 16-Jul-2022
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Thanks! I appreciate the feedback.
Comment from Katherine M. (k-11)
This story gets off to a great start, with good description and use of dialogue to move the plot along. But then it begins to race along so quickly the reader begins to reel. I think there is actually too much dialogue to cope with the increasing number of characters. And certainly the format needs fixing. Each speech event should stand alone, in an individual paragraph, including white space before and after. Kate xx
reply by the author on 13-Jul-2022
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This story gets off to a great start, with good description and use of dialogue to move the plot along. But then it begins to race along so quickly the reader begins to reel. I think there is actually too much dialogue to cope with the increasing number of characters. And certainly the format needs fixing. Each speech event should stand alone, in an individual paragraph, including white space before and after. Kate xx
Comment Written 12-Jul-2022
reply by the author on 13-Jul-2022
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Thanks for the suggestions!
