Infinitesimalisation
We are but motes, yearning for purpose37 total reviews
Comment from Lilly Flowers
Hm...I think your poem speaks to how small we are in the universe and how we struggle to express and define ourselves. This is beautifully written and I liked your notes. I'm glad you offer the reader the opportunity to interpret it. Regards, Lilly
reply by the author on 26-Jun-2022
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Hm...I think your poem speaks to how small we are in the universe and how we struggle to express and define ourselves. This is beautifully written and I liked your notes. I'm glad you offer the reader the opportunity to interpret it. Regards, Lilly
Comment Written 26-Jun-2022
reply by the author on 26-Jun-2022
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Thank you, Lilly :-). I think poetry is as much for the reader as the writer. I'm really happy you shared your response with me.
Mike
Comment from Elviss
An introspective coming of age poem that describes a life whose worth is based on, ironically, words. I loved how the title perfectly encapsulates the erasing of all the words, an action that leaves behind nothing but a sheet of paper and, maybe, an infinitesimal blob of ink.
reply by the author on 26-Jun-2022
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An introspective coming of age poem that describes a life whose worth is based on, ironically, words. I loved how the title perfectly encapsulates the erasing of all the words, an action that leaves behind nothing but a sheet of paper and, maybe, an infinitesimal blob of ink.
Comment Written 26-Jun-2022
reply by the author on 26-Jun-2022
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Thanks so much :-). I think our searches for understanding come in many forms and usually generated more questions, all good fun to probe!
Mike
Comment from Aussie
Interesting take on how small we are in this mighty universe; a grain of sand on god's golden shore. We all have the ability to open the pages of our minds and transfer the subjects and ideas to poetry. K xx
reply by the author on 26-Jun-2022
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Interesting take on how small we are in this mighty universe; a grain of sand on god's golden shore. We all have the ability to open the pages of our minds and transfer the subjects and ideas to poetry. K xx
Comment Written 26-Jun-2022
reply by the author on 26-Jun-2022
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Thank you, K :-). I really enjoyed exploring our littleness!
Mike
Comment from Katie Mae Dead
Wow Mike. You've got so many award winning lines here.
Your opening is a real ass kicker and made me wonder how you were going to get your ass eventually kicked . That couplet alone deserves a six.
Then you have "glass" and "pass" on which I expected a period after "pass". After vast and cast I lost the rhythm a bit though.
Upon an ocean of my peers...brilliant!! Stopped of my veneers...equally awesome!
Amazing lines throughout with a slap-in-the-face message for all of us.
You fall a bit off the meter a few times but overall it really a near flawless power packed punch with a killer ending.
Bravo sir!!
Much enjoyed
Katiemae Dead
reply by the author on 26-Jun-2022
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Wow Mike. You've got so many award winning lines here.
Your opening is a real ass kicker and made me wonder how you were going to get your ass eventually kicked . That couplet alone deserves a six.
Then you have "glass" and "pass" on which I expected a period after "pass". After vast and cast I lost the rhythm a bit though.
Upon an ocean of my peers...brilliant!! Stopped of my veneers...equally awesome!
Amazing lines throughout with a slap-in-the-face message for all of us.
You fall a bit off the meter a few times but overall it really a near flawless power packed punch with a killer ending.
Bravo sir!!
Much enjoyed
Katiemae Dead
Comment Written 25-Jun-2022
reply by the author on 26-Jun-2022
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Thanks so much, Katie :-). This one very much got to the core of who I am. I'm thrilled you enjoyed the read!
Mike
Comment from Pearl Edwards
I certainly did enjoy the read, Mike, and what a clever word/title. I think being a poet is a blessing it helps to release emotions and thoughts and know someone, somewhere will read them. Loved this one, cheers Valda
reply by the author on 26-Jun-2022
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I certainly did enjoy the read, Mike, and what a clever word/title. I think being a poet is a blessing it helps to release emotions and thoughts and know someone, somewhere will read them. Loved this one, cheers Valda
Comment Written 25-Jun-2022
reply by the author on 26-Jun-2022
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Thanks so much, Valda :-). Ain't that the truth - I think of my poetry as the steam vent on my sanity!
Mike
Comment from kiwisteveh
Yes, I enjoyed this thank you. There is a certain energy in the flow of your well-rhymed and metered lines, helped out no doubt by the interspersing of shorter 4-lined stanzas between the longer ones.
Who knows what it all means - i suspect I could examine each verse in minute detail and still arrive at the same basic conclusion - that we poets are just as helpless against the greater forces of the world as anyone else and the best we can hope for is to attempt to take charge of our own destiny.
Lots of clever vocab choices here to make the reader sit up and take notice.
Steve
reply by the author on 26-Jun-2022
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Yes, I enjoyed this thank you. There is a certain energy in the flow of your well-rhymed and metered lines, helped out no doubt by the interspersing of shorter 4-lined stanzas between the longer ones.
Who knows what it all means - i suspect I could examine each verse in minute detail and still arrive at the same basic conclusion - that we poets are just as helpless against the greater forces of the world as anyone else and the best we can hope for is to attempt to take charge of our own destiny.
Lots of clever vocab choices here to make the reader sit up and take notice.
Steve
Comment Written 25-Jun-2022
reply by the author on 26-Jun-2022
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Thanks Steve :-). I enjoyed writing this - it gets to the nuts of what makes my mind tick. So glad you liked it!
Mike
Comment from strandregs
Enjoyed enjoyed
And enjoyed
Shame on you fleedly my friend
Fed by the sun
So deep a meaning
Nothing
No cabbage
No worms
No pumpkins
No poets without the sun.
And no poems.
So dark.
Wonderful work.
So tantalising
And I even understood most of the words.
You hit the mark
You little spark. :-))Z.
reply by the author on 26-Jun-2022
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Enjoyed enjoyed
And enjoyed
Shame on you fleedly my friend
Fed by the sun
So deep a meaning
Nothing
No cabbage
No worms
No pumpkins
No poets without the sun.
And no poems.
So dark.
Wonderful work.
So tantalising
And I even understood most of the words.
You hit the mark
You little spark. :-))Z.
Comment Written 25-Jun-2022
reply by the author on 26-Jun-2022
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Now I want cabbage soup...
Tha ks so much, my friend. I really appreciate it :-)
Mike
Comment from rspoet
Hello Mike,
The universe will little note nor long remember our presence here. Though others who have made similar statements were proven wrong, so who can say.
If anyone is likely to be remembered, it is the poet.
If anyone is likely to be heard, it is the poet.
So write and read, send forth and see what transpires.
Enjoyed your poem.
Best wishes.
Robert
reply by the author on 25-Jun-2022
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Hello Mike,
The universe will little note nor long remember our presence here. Though others who have made similar statements were proven wrong, so who can say.
If anyone is likely to be remembered, it is the poet.
If anyone is likely to be heard, it is the poet.
So write and read, send forth and see what transpires.
Enjoyed your poem.
Best wishes.
Robert
Comment Written 25-Jun-2022
reply by the author on 25-Jun-2022
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Thanks so much, Robert :-). Poetry seems the ideal format for exploring philosophical questions as a little pretension seemes fitting! Thank for sharing your thoughts and for the awesome review.
Mike
Comment from estory
There's a muted, contemplative melody and mood to this philosophical piece. It's like watching or listening to someone work out their place in the world and life through this intricate, complicated thought process in which you move from self to society, and seem to except with resignation the imperfection of experience. Nice echoing rhyme effects and nice rolling meter that seemed like waves rolling in the sea. estory
reply by the author on 25-Jun-2022
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There's a muted, contemplative melody and mood to this philosophical piece. It's like watching or listening to someone work out their place in the world and life through this intricate, complicated thought process in which you move from self to society, and seem to except with resignation the imperfection of experience. Nice echoing rhyme effects and nice rolling meter that seemed like waves rolling in the sea. estory
Comment Written 25-Jun-2022
reply by the author on 25-Jun-2022
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Thank you :-). I'm really happy you enjoyed the read.
Mike
Comment from Janice Canerdy
This is a very deep and vividly descriptive poem about life--how very much and how very little a person IS, in the overall scheme. To your excellent metaphors "a single mote, "a rubber strand of rubbed-out gold,"
and "a pointless speark fed by the sun," I would add "dust in the wind"
(from song by Kansas), and "a vapor" (James 4: 14 says this of our lives).
reply by the author on 25-Jun-2022
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This is a very deep and vividly descriptive poem about life--how very much and how very little a person IS, in the overall scheme. To your excellent metaphors "a single mote, "a rubber strand of rubbed-out gold,"
and "a pointless speark fed by the sun," I would add "dust in the wind"
(from song by Kansas), and "a vapor" (James 4: 14 says this of our lives).
Comment Written 25-Jun-2022
reply by the author on 25-Jun-2022
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Thank you, Janice, for the lovely review and for sharing quotes with similar sentiments :-)
Mike
