Reviews from

Chasing Gnomes

Viewing comments for Chapter 3 "Chasing Gnomes Ch.3 - Cuppage"
Dragon Dance Chronicles Book 1

16 total reviews 
Comment from tfawcus
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I enjoyed Chapter 2, and the narrow escape down the chute. Benchmark sounds like the kind of character that fits army uniforms onto new recruits! Not sure that the pub sounds much of an improvement on the poop shoot, but at least they have beer.

 Comment Written 25-Jun-2022


reply by the author on 25-Jun-2022
    We can forgive a lot for beer, although I'm not sure the Dragon's Tail serves the best brew in town. I like writing Benchmark's scenes - he's a scoundrel, but in the friendliest possible way :-)

    Mike
Comment from lyenochka
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Well, our heroine is certainly hardy. It seems she has a good rapport with the people she deals with. Hope she will have the funds to pay the blacksmith and the innkeeper. Will Elljay get some beer, too?

 Comment Written 22-Jun-2022


reply by the author on 22-Jun-2022
    I'm not sure EllJay can take a full tankard of beer :-). Tha ks so much for reading and reviewing!

    Mike
Comment from Jay Squires
Excellent
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Your comedic voice is never far away in this fantasy. It reminds me a little of Robert Aspirin's fantasies, though your humor is subtler and so far I haven't seen any dragons. I like your protagonist. She is a strong character, but I sense hidden vulnerabilities. At least I think I sense them. It's hard to tell since they're hidden. Since I'm already following you, I'll keep an eye out for the next segment. You have a lot to admire, Mike!

 Comment Written 21-Jun-2022


reply by the author on 22-Jun-2022
    Thanks so much, Jay :-). I always try to think about what a realistic version of a fantasy trope might be. So wizards are around, but it messes with their heads. Fighting can be a way of life, but it'll be a short one for most. Hopefully, this plays into the comedy.

    Mike
reply by Jay Squires on 22-Jun-2022
    Well, something certainly plays into the comedy, Mike.
Comment from Cindy Warren
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I'm still not sure how she got away. Most shit pits I've seen don't have a lot of escape routes. Anyway, I'm glad she got away, along with her gobbit. I can't wait to see what she does next.

 Comment Written 21-Jun-2022


reply by the author on 22-Jun-2022
    Thank you, Cindy :-). I'll admit, I hadn't thought about that, but you've given me an idea for a funny anecdote later in the story!

    Mike
Comment from Carol Hillebrenner
Excellent
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This is not usually the kind of fantasy that I enjoy, but you are a talented writer and I look forward to each chapter. You also have one heck of an imagination, so keep on writing. Have you ever considered publication, possibly in an online site or anthology? If he survived the illness he had before the pandemic, Ralan.com has a great list of markets. He's in Great Britian.

 Comment Written 21-Jun-2022


reply by the author on 22-Jun-2022
    Thank you, Carol. I'll have a look. In the meantime, I'm really happy you enjoyed the read :-)

    Mike
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
Excellent
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I'm loving this story, and in my next life I'm coming back like Roz!! The descriptions of that bar was enough to put you off going pubbing for life!! I totally keeled over at the description of her armour, and the codpiece, that was hilarious! Now to wait and see what happens next, I'm sure there will be some more fun and games. Love it. :)) Sandra xx

 Comment Written 21-Jun-2022


reply by the author on 21-Jun-2022
    Thanks so much, Sandra :-). I'm glad Roz comes across as strong as I see her in my head. Next chapter almost ready!

    Mike
Comment from dmt1967
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He (saw me see him and there was the briefest hesitation as he apparently) debated continuing to hide, regardless. (spotted me, hesitated, and) In my opinion, this sounds tighter.

Great chapter and thank you for sharing. Have a great week.

 Comment Written 21-Jun-2022


reply by the author on 21-Jun-2022
    Thanks for the pointer - that is indeed an awkward sentence. I'll have a play with it. So glad you enjoyed the chapter :-)

    Mike
Comment from Judy Lawless
Excellent
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This is another hilarious chapter, Mike. That Roz is a brave and brazen girl! I think I might have missed the last chapter, or I read it when I should have been sleeping, lol. I'll have to go back and take a look. Great work!

 Comment Written 20-Jun-2022


reply by the author on 21-Jun-2022
    Thank you, Judy! Hey, I was writing when I should have been sleeping last night, so no judgement! Thanks so much for the awesome review :-)

    Mike
reply by Judy Lawless on 21-Jun-2022
    You're welcome, Mike. I did go back and saw I had read and reviewed the last chapter. I can't believe I forgot about the poop chute escape! lol I just remembered her getting caught during her attempted thief! Guess I was only half awake.
Comment from royowen
Excellent
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I love the dialogue, more about what's more said than what is. You've set some good imagery some I remember well from a former existence. The surrounds are very familiar. I like the way you delay the defining of a plot, and sometimes hiding all through, well done, blessings Roy

 Comment Written 20-Jun-2022


reply by the author on 20-Jun-2022
    Thank you, Roy :-). In my original draft, this is only the very start of chapter 2, so the plot isn't here yet, but I have to make sure I keep my posts a sensible length! Thanks for the great review :-)

    Mike
reply by royowen on 20-Jun-2022
    Well done Mike
Comment from barbara.wilkey
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I am wondering what Rozlyn is setting herself up for next. I am positive it will be really good. Thank you for sharing this with us. You are a great storyteller and have unique characters.

 Comment Written 20-Jun-2022


reply by the author on 20-Jun-2022
    Thank you :-). Let's hope the old gang can help her out of the predicament she's got herself into!

    Mike