Quiet Lawyer
Viewing comments for Chapter 19 "Quiet Lawyer Chapter 11"Can a broken heart be mended?
27 total reviews
Comment from Begin Again
Trouble, trouble, double trouble...She seems to have it looming all around her, though it does appear she's not afraid to protect herself. Another good one!
Smiles and hugs, Carol
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2022
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Trouble, trouble, double trouble...She seems to have it looming all around her, though it does appear she's not afraid to protect herself. Another good one!
Smiles and hugs, Carol
Comment Written 27-Oct-2022
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2022
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Thank you so much.
Comment from Rosemary Everson1
Sounds like Ali is quite nice looking being she has a lot of attention from the opposite sex. She has turned into a real good ranch hand herself. It does sound like Texas has a few bad creatures crawling around, even a horse knows how dangerous they are.
reply by the author on 26-May-2022
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Sounds like Ali is quite nice looking being she has a lot of attention from the opposite sex. She has turned into a real good ranch hand herself. It does sound like Texas has a few bad creatures crawling around, even a horse knows how dangerous they are.
Comment Written 25-May-2022
reply by the author on 26-May-2022
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Oh so true. Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Brett Matthew West
"Be safe"/ "I will" - sure fire indication trouble brews up ahead.
Strong relationships between characters.
Natural flowing dialogue.
Some of the reasons interest is built into this tale.
reply by the author on 24-May-2022
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"Be safe"/ "I will" - sure fire indication trouble brews up ahead.
Strong relationships between characters.
Natural flowing dialogue.
Some of the reasons interest is built into this tale.
Comment Written 24-May-2022
reply by the author on 24-May-2022
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Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Annmuma
This book is coming together exceptionally well! Every chapter is written in a way to continue the character growth and increase the readers' relationships with the characters. Good job. ann
reply by the author on 23-May-2022
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This book is coming together exceptionally well! Every chapter is written in a way to continue the character growth and increase the readers' relationships with the characters. Good job. ann
Comment Written 22-May-2022
reply by the author on 23-May-2022
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Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from K.L. Rockquemore
I enjoyed reading another chapter. I hope I don't sound redundant
in my reviews, but this is well-written, composed, and presented as t
the previous I have read. The dialogue is engaging, authentic, and flows
naturally. Your writing draws me in and keeps me until the end. Looking
forward to the next one.
reply by the author on 19-May-2022
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I enjoyed reading another chapter. I hope I don't sound redundant
in my reviews, but this is well-written, composed, and presented as t
the previous I have read. The dialogue is engaging, authentic, and flows
naturally. Your writing draws me in and keeps me until the end. Looking
forward to the next one.
Comment Written 18-May-2022
reply by the author on 19-May-2022
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Thank you. I appreciate you stopping by.
Comment from robyn corum
Barb,
Nice chapter! I always enjoy your writing. It's nice and smooth and warm. *smile* The people are real and seem like folks I'd enjoy knowing in real life.
Some notes, if I may:
1.) She rubbed her arms as goosebumps crept across them and started toward the house.
--> a little edit, maybe. Right now, you have the goosebumps starting toward the house.
2.) Although I was kinda happy to see Cord show up - that was a really easy solution to that problem and 'easy' is typically not good. Just a reminder. (I know you know this.)
3.) At the very minimum(,) he needs to be on the range with you. Don't move anybody here. You'll need all hands moving the cattle. I'll take care of the ladies."
--> I am not sure I understand the verbiage here. Dad is saying reconsider before you jump to firing him - you'll need him on the range, right?
--> What 'does don't move anybody here' mean?
--> the part about needing all hands moving the cattle refers back to the range again, right? So that MAY not be needed? Also - if you do keep it, change 'move' since you just used it.
--> what does he mean about taking care of the ladies? Like, when the guys are off on the range?
4.) "Let's go inside."
Once inside, Jorge kissed Rosa.
--> 'inside' x2
5.) Rosa eyed her son but kissed her husband.
--> as she returned her husband's kiss
--> otherwise, it's two kisses?
Nice job! I enjoyed!
reply by the author on 19-May-2022
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Barb,
Nice chapter! I always enjoy your writing. It's nice and smooth and warm. *smile* The people are real and seem like folks I'd enjoy knowing in real life.
Some notes, if I may:
1.) She rubbed her arms as goosebumps crept across them and started toward the house.
--> a little edit, maybe. Right now, you have the goosebumps starting toward the house.
2.) Although I was kinda happy to see Cord show up - that was a really easy solution to that problem and 'easy' is typically not good. Just a reminder. (I know you know this.)
3.) At the very minimum(,) he needs to be on the range with you. Don't move anybody here. You'll need all hands moving the cattle. I'll take care of the ladies."
--> I am not sure I understand the verbiage here. Dad is saying reconsider before you jump to firing him - you'll need him on the range, right?
--> What 'does don't move anybody here' mean?
--> the part about needing all hands moving the cattle refers back to the range again, right? So that MAY not be needed? Also - if you do keep it, change 'move' since you just used it.
--> what does he mean about taking care of the ladies? Like, when the guys are off on the range?
4.) "Let's go inside."
Once inside, Jorge kissed Rosa.
--> 'inside' x2
5.) Rosa eyed her son but kissed her husband.
--> as she returned her husband's kiss
--> otherwise, it's two kisses?
Nice job! I enjoyed!
Comment Written 18-May-2022
reply by the author on 19-May-2022
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Gary show's up later in the story so I need something there. I'll see what I can do. Maybe when Cord returns, Ali tells him, but she took care of it. Hmmm.. Thank you.
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Yeah. Easy isn't good. I can see another hand coming up - or even Rosa coming out looking for her. Even Ali might slap him and stop it.
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You know - if that were the case - I wouldn't even have Ali tell him? I would have the exchange be between Cord and Gary. Maybe Cord could be having a bad moment because of something - horse stepped on his foot and he's gruff and turns to meet Gary and Gary says, Oh, I guess Ali told you about ...
Then he could go to her and say - why didn't you tell me about lalala And she could say well you already think I get into enough trouble. I wanted to just handle this by myself.
lalala
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I like that idea.
Comment from Theodore McDowell
Still traveling, Barb. Wanted to shoot you a thumbs up for the chapter and assure you that I am following the story from a distance. Well-done as usual!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
reply by the author on 18-May-2022
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Still traveling, Barb. Wanted to shoot you a thumbs up for the chapter and assure you that I am following the story from a distance. Well-done as usual!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Comment Written 17-May-2022
reply by the author on 18-May-2022
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Thank you for the kind review. We leave tomorrow.
Comment from estory
You do a really great job of creating all these strong characters that interact and contrast, and bringing it all out in dialogue. I loved the tension in this chapter. It was great. You are a master of these love triangle episodes and family dramas. estory
reply by the author on 17-May-2022
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You do a really great job of creating all these strong characters that interact and contrast, and bringing it all out in dialogue. I loved the tension in this chapter. It was great. You are a master of these love triangle episodes and family dramas. estory
Comment Written 17-May-2022
reply by the author on 17-May-2022
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Thank you for the encouragement.
Comment from dmt1967
I don't usually read books this far in but I couldn't resist this one. The first paragraph is a bit repetitive. Try using the characters name more. It will break the word 'she' up a bit. Also when the guy phones... Don't tell show... 'He picked up his phone and punched in the number...'
Great chapter and thank you for sharing.
reply by the author on 17-May-2022
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I don't usually read books this far in but I couldn't resist this one. The first paragraph is a bit repetitive. Try using the characters name more. It will break the word 'she' up a bit. Also when the guy phones... Don't tell show... 'He picked up his phone and punched in the number...'
Great chapter and thank you for sharing.
Comment Written 17-May-2022
reply by the author on 17-May-2022
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I will recheck these areas. Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from John Ciarmello
This is a great Chapter! Cordero is right about keeping Ali out of trouble. I think Cordero is going to end up killing someone over her. Have fun at the graduation, my friend.
reply by the author on 17-May-2022
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This is a great Chapter! Cordero is right about keeping Ali out of trouble. I think Cordero is going to end up killing someone over her. Have fun at the graduation, my friend.
Comment Written 16-May-2022
reply by the author on 17-May-2022
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Thank you for the kind review and well wishes.
