The Return
Viewing comments for Chapter 17 "The Return Chapter 17"Erotic Turmoil
37 total reviews
Comment from Begin Again
Good morning, my dear friend
I am so ashamed of my overwhelmed self and being so neglectful of your wonderful efforts in producing such an outstanding story. I have read each week but never left a review. I love the story and today I will correct my failures by rereading and leaving you your well deserved stars.
Love you and think of you often... Carol
reply by the author on 29-May-2022
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Good morning, my dear friend
I am so ashamed of my overwhelmed self and being so neglectful of your wonderful efforts in producing such an outstanding story. I have read each week but never left a review. I love the story and today I will correct my failures by rereading and leaving you your well deserved stars.
Love you and think of you often... Carol
Comment Written 29-May-2022
reply by the author on 29-May-2022
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Aw, Carol, bless your heart. I'm often thinking of you, and wish you were well enough to start writing again, I miss you so much. Thank you so much for catching up, you really make me feel so humble. Love you lots, my dear friend and thank you for those lovely stars! :) Sandra xxxx
Comment from giraffmang
Hi Sandra,
you did a good job with this piece. Well-described and fitting with what has gone before.
she sat and admired the clear, starlit night sky.- very minor here, but you could omit night, starlit services this.
Not sure Bessie was having just as good a time though....
All the best
G
reply by the author on 15-May-2022
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Hi Sandra,
you did a good job with this piece. Well-described and fitting with what has gone before.
she sat and admired the clear, starlit night sky.- very minor here, but you could omit night, starlit services this.
Not sure Bessie was having just as good a time though....
All the best
G
Comment Written 15-May-2022
reply by the author on 15-May-2022
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Thank you so much for going back and reading the chapters, Gareth, and also pointing out that 'night', I should have noticed that! I'm glad you enjoyed this part. Thanks, my friend. Warm hugs, Sandra xx
Comment from F. William Lester
Okay. This one got me going. Had to sit still for a moment and adjust my pacemaker after reading it. Very effective writing and a sexually driven encounter, tastefully done. Some of your best writing. I have one comment and I had to search to find this one. :) In the following paragraph, "When her gaze wandered, she noticed the book on the table and picked it up. It was poetry written by Elizabeth Barrett Browning. Margot opened it and turned the pages; they were poems of either love or terrible grief. One poem in particular caught her eye because she knew the words off by heart." was the book introduced earlier? You said "the" book. If it wasn't, I would change it to "a" book. At the end of the last sentence, "...knew the words off by heart." I would delete "off". Sorry for being so fussy. Excellent chapter (not because of the sex) and deserving of a six. Well written. Stay well, my friend. Frank
reply by the author on 28-Apr-2022
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Okay. This one got me going. Had to sit still for a moment and adjust my pacemaker after reading it. Very effective writing and a sexually driven encounter, tastefully done. Some of your best writing. I have one comment and I had to search to find this one. :) In the following paragraph, "When her gaze wandered, she noticed the book on the table and picked it up. It was poetry written by Elizabeth Barrett Browning. Margot opened it and turned the pages; they were poems of either love or terrible grief. One poem in particular caught her eye because she knew the words off by heart." was the book introduced earlier? You said "the" book. If it wasn't, I would change it to "a" book. At the end of the last sentence, "...knew the words off by heart." I would delete "off". Sorry for being so fussy. Excellent chapter (not because of the sex) and deserving of a six. Well written. Stay well, my friend. Frank
Comment Written 27-Apr-2022
reply by the author on 28-Apr-2022
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Lol, I hope your pacemaker is still working okay! Thank you so much for another really lovely review,and the golden star. That you thought this bedroom scene was tastefully done, made my day. :))
I've removed, 'off' and changed 'the' to 'a'. Thank you very much for pointing those out. They would have been something I might have overlooked in my final edit. You are never fussy, my friend, you are a great help and I really appreciate you. Thank you again. Warm hugs, Sandra xxx
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Thanks, Sandra. I glad to be helpful. Stay well.
Comment from estory
You've penned this exciting erotic, sensual scene between Margot and Miles, and you worked in that awkwardness Margot feels at not really being Meg, but her own selfish feelings seem to win out and she takes him anyway. So the emotional side of the story gets more complicated. The details in the descriptions make the episode. Nice job with bringing this scene to life. estory
reply by the author on 27-Apr-2022
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You've penned this exciting erotic, sensual scene between Margot and Miles, and you worked in that awkwardness Margot feels at not really being Meg, but her own selfish feelings seem to win out and she takes him anyway. So the emotional side of the story gets more complicated. The details in the descriptions make the episode. Nice job with bringing this scene to life. estory
Comment Written 27-Apr-2022
reply by the author on 27-Apr-2022
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Thank you so much for reading this chapter, Estory, I'm so pleased you liked it. It was nice to read that you thought I'd brought the characters to life in that scene! Thank you, my friend. :)) Sandra xx
Comment from K.L. Rockquemore
I love when I read a chapter, a short, a poem or scene, when I can " fall into" it. That's the sign of a great writer. You have done that with this post. I didn't see any flaws to point out. Thank you for sharing your talent.
reply by the author on 27-Apr-2022
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I love when I read a chapter, a short, a poem or scene, when I can " fall into" it. That's the sign of a great writer. You have done that with this post. I didn't see any flaws to point out. Thank you for sharing your talent.
Comment Written 26-Apr-2022
reply by the author on 27-Apr-2022
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What a lovely compliment, Kitty! Thank you so much. I'm delighted you enjoyed this chapter, thanks, my friend. :)) Sandra xx
Comment from Elizabeth Emerald
Brilliant. The epitome of proof as to writers of erotica not being obligated to devolve to smutty S&M swill a la Fifty Shades of Grey. Can't wait to see what is to "come."
reply by the author on 27-Apr-2022
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Brilliant. The epitome of proof as to writers of erotica not being obligated to devolve to smutty S&M swill a la Fifty Shades of Grey. Can't wait to see what is to "come."
Comment Written 26-Apr-2022
reply by the author on 27-Apr-2022
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Thank you so much, Liz! That is such a compliment, it was so hard to write and get it right. I'm so glad you think I've done that. Thanks, my friend. :)) Sandra xx
Comment from rspoet
Hello Sandra,
I think your readers will love this chapter, though an ice-cold drink might be needed afterwards. I don't knows who's happier, Margot, Meg, or Miles.
It must have been a bit odd for Margot to hear Miles use Meg's name, and for Meg to know it was Margot who was in bed with Miles. Oh the games authors play.
Now, of course, the real work has to be done. To figure out how to save Meg.
Fortunately, Bessie has her mind of the objective.
Well done. Hope everything is going well.
Robert
reply by the author on 26-Apr-2022
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Hello Sandra,
I think your readers will love this chapter, though an ice-cold drink might be needed afterwards. I don't knows who's happier, Margot, Meg, or Miles.
It must have been a bit odd for Margot to hear Miles use Meg's name, and for Meg to know it was Margot who was in bed with Miles. Oh the games authors play.
Now, of course, the real work has to be done. To figure out how to save Meg.
Fortunately, Bessie has her mind of the objective.
Well done. Hope everything is going well.
Robert
Comment Written 26-Apr-2022
reply by the author on 26-Apr-2022
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LOL, this is a threesome with a difference! Margot is the only one who is going to feel the guilt, she's the only one of the three who knows the truth. I'm glad this chapter is out the way, though, now the investigation will really get going. Thank you so much for this lovely review, and the wonderful golden star! Warm hugs, my friend. :)) Sandra xx
Comment from Sanku
you have successfully managed to write about a difficult subject which could have easily caused offence but did not. The love making scene was intriguing knowing that one is a real woman and the other is a ghost....
(though she has travelled back in time) and you have ended the chapter at a very important point...
reply by the author on 26-Apr-2022
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you have successfully managed to write about a difficult subject which could have easily caused offence but did not. The love making scene was intriguing knowing that one is a real woman and the other is a ghost....
(though she has travelled back in time) and you have ended the chapter at a very important point...
Comment Written 26-Apr-2022
reply by the author on 26-Apr-2022
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Thank you so much for reading this chapter, your comments are so encouraging, and appreciated. It was a difficult one to write and keep it tasteful. Thank you for saying I'd managed to do it successfully. Warm hugs, my friend. :)) Sandra xx
Comment from Ric Myworld
"It was over so fast." Wouldn't you know it. Just as things were getting to the downhill grade, there was a dip in the road that put a stop to everything. LOL. Thanks for sharing another fine chapter.
reply by the author on 26-Apr-2022
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"It was over so fast." Wouldn't you know it. Just as things were getting to the downhill grade, there was a dip in the road that put a stop to everything. LOL. Thanks for sharing another fine chapter.
Comment Written 26-Apr-2022
reply by the author on 26-Apr-2022
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Lol, Ric, you are so funny. Thank you so much for this really lovely review and a super hug for the golden star! I'm glad you enjoyed this part, it had to happen!! Warm hugs, my friend. :)) Sandra xxx
Comment from alexisleech
What a wonderful chapter! You managed to write about a sensitive subject without causing offence, whilst including enough detail to make the whole scene sensual and believable. Well done, my friend, you must feel very proud of yourself.
As always, I can't wait for the next instalment!
Alexis xxx
reply by the author on 26-Apr-2022
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What a wonderful chapter! You managed to write about a sensitive subject without causing offence, whilst including enough detail to make the whole scene sensual and believable. Well done, my friend, you must feel very proud of yourself.
As always, I can't wait for the next instalment!
Alexis xxx
Comment Written 26-Apr-2022
reply by the author on 26-Apr-2022
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I'm so pleased you liked this chapter, Alexis, and I'm more that pleased that you thought I'd written it in way that wouldn't cause offence but was still sensual. That made my day. Thank you so much for this lovely review and the golden star to go with it. You're so kind! Warm hugs, my friend. Sandra xxx