Reviews from

Mr Moon

poem for a child

7 total reviews 
Comment from Rosemary Everson1
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The sky is definitely a wonderful sight when the stars are twinkling. The galaxy is so bright at night sometimes that the moon also can have a glow of its own.

 Comment Written 24-Apr-2022


reply by the author on 24-Apr-2022
    Thank you
Comment from Tom Horonzy
Excellent
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This should bring a smile to a child's eyes before they fade to sleep at night, especially if the moonlight is shining into their room, I think. My fav line would be: Mr. Moon is smiling, because he loves the stars that are twinkling,

 Comment Written 24-Apr-2022


reply by the author on 24-Apr-2022
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Comment from Gypsy Blue Rose
Excellent
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Excellent entry for the For A Child writing prompt contest. I love the presentation and imagery. Great expresive word choices. The rhymes don't seem forced.

The moon is so magical, I love it.

Good luck in the contest.

 Comment Written 23-Apr-2022


reply by the author on 23-Apr-2022
    Thank you
Comment from jessizero
Excellent
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I like the thought of the moon being a friendly man crowned by stars. Usually I hear of the moon as a woman. This was a nice change. Thanks for sharing!

 Comment Written 23-Apr-2022


reply by the author on 23-Apr-2022
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Comment from Carolyn Dooley
Excellent
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This would be great for a child to read before going to bed. They can lie in bed and think about the moon above our heads. Even wonder about the man in the moon. You have a great child's poem. I hope you win the contest. Thank you for sharing.

 Comment Written 23-Apr-2022


reply by the author on 23-Apr-2022
    Thank you
reply by Carolyn Dooley on 23-Apr-2022
    You are welcome.
Comment from Julcia
Excellent
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This poem is a delight for children to enjoy. It appears you have carefully worked on its rhymes. Perhaps you could choose an alternative set of words to strenghten line eight. This is my only suggestion for a poem well suited for children in the early primary grades.

 Comment Written 23-Apr-2022


reply by the author on 23-Apr-2022
    Thank you for your review. I have edited line 8 which I think reads better.
Comment from giraffmang
Good
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Hi there,

I kind of enjoyed the subject matter for this one but one of the most important aspects for children's poetry isn't juts the rhyme, it's the rhythm of the piece and it's quite difficult to catch that with this piece.

All the best
GMG

 Comment Written 23-Apr-2022


reply by the author on 23-Apr-2022
    Thank you
reply by the author on 23-Apr-2022
    I have edited. I think it reads a bit easier.