Reviews from

I Was Not Just A Building

Contest entry

7 total reviews 
Comment from Sally Carter
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

What a powerful piece of writing. You started angry, and that anger increased, justifiably, with every line. So clever to write from the building's point of view.
Wonderful descriptions of some of the affected businesses, not just their names, but images of some of the activities that went on there, such as in the barber's. Beautiful.
I found the stanza "I remain" particularly powerful.
I am in the UK, so not as well informed as many readers of this poem will be. But the message I take from it is that however justified a cause may be, wreaking havoc on a community serves no one. In my country there is so much anger and division these days, and I imagine it may be even worse in yours. These are very bad days.
I shall be amazed if this doesn't do well in the contest. It deserves to.

 Comment Written 27-Feb-2022


reply by the author on 27-Feb-2022
    Thank you for the wonderful and thoughtful review. Interestingly, I did get angrier and angrier as I wrote. Usually, putting it on paper gets it out of my brain loop and into a more reasonable perspective. This time it was the opposite. The riots were bad, the wokeness is stifling, but regardless of what the press would have you believe, racism is not running rampant in the USA. It seems to be politically advantageous for the left to call everything and everyone racist since it shuts down conversation. I blame them and the main stream media for dividing us and trying to keep us angry. Ok, second rant of mine I subjected you to. Sorry. - Wendy
Comment from kiwisteveh
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Wow!

Wow!

So what happened to the sweetly rhyming verses about puppy dogs and puddy-cats and wee singing birdies?

This is a revelation. Have I ever seen a free verse piece from you before. It evidently comes from deep inside and the powerful emotions and deeply held personal beliefs are like a series of violent punches to the gut.

You managed to keep the rage going throughout this lengthy piece and, if anything, building it up to a real crescendo, while at the same time setting out the different types of damages and sharing the blame for this community disaster.

Great piece and if this doesn't claim a high place on the podium, I will be very surprised.

Steve

 Comment Written 24-Feb-2022


reply by the author on 25-Feb-2022
    Hey Steve. I guess the pet store was one of the casualties of the orgy of hatred that has defined the crazy covid years and this just bubbled up again when I saw the disparity of treatment for the honking truck drivers. I wrote the first draft of this in March of 2001 and then tucked it away when my ex died and I didn't feel much like writing. The recent events sent me in search of the early attempt and I decided to finish it. Mr. Tredeau knelt in solidarity with the BLM/George Floyd movement while many of their people were burning, looting and destroying their own neighborhoods. Thank goodness Antifa didn't bring out the bouncy houses or he might have turned against them. Thanks for reading and reviewing my rant. The extra star is a much appreciated bonus. - Wendy
Comment from Sally Law
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I stand with you, dear Wendy. What a terrible place America has become with this stuff. It sickening with no end in sight. I am so sorry for your collective losses. George Floyd has become an excuse to inflict much harm on all people. Their message was lost in this because of all the hatred, destruction, and violence. The extremes have become the most racist of them all. God help us as we try to heal and get on with life. Thing is, many of them don't want us to. They'd kill the entire population if they could. Looks and acts like a terror organization to me. Our nation is in real trouble at this moment on many fronts and crime is ever increasing, especially homicides in democrat run cities like Chicago and Baltimore. I keep my eye on the weekend toll of deaths, and many are children. Why do we put up with leaders that allow this? Vote them out and impeach, I say!

Virtual six for this one. Well penned and detailed. Send it to your local leaders. Better yet, send it to President Biden and staff.
Sending you my best today as always,
Sal XOs...

 Comment Written 24-Feb-2022


reply by the author on 24-Feb-2022
    Your words are much appreciated, Sally. We the people need to speak up more often. The virtual six is also lovely.- Wendy
Comment from LisaMay
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Virtual 6
This is very powerful writing. You brought the dramatic scenes to life, the impact on the shopkeepers, the loss of social amenity... the nihilism and violence downplayed by those who should have had the ability to do something about it. I don't live in America, so these tensions are unfamiliar to me apart from watching at a remove on TV, but your writing put me right in the thick of it, and I could see exactly what you mean. I think I would feel the same way too if it happened in my country (New Zealand).

 Comment Written 24-Feb-2022


reply by the author on 24-Feb-2022
    The virtual six is much appreciated. The fires have died down a bit, but the attitudes behind them remain. The problems remain. The solutions still difficult to obtain. - Wendy
reply by LisaMay on 24-Feb-2022
    I fear it is an entrenched divide.
Comment from Tom Horonzy
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Amazing. I concur with what you have written. Downright shameful but worse a framework for others to follow suit especially when the elected officials fear to do a thing but submit to tyranny.

 Comment Written 23-Feb-2022


reply by the author on 24-Feb-2022
    Thank you for taking the time to read and review my rather long rant. - Wendy
Comment from John Ciarmello
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

This is a wonderful piece of writing. You brought this history to life. The day of old. The times in between and the ensuing end to your monument of existence. I wish you much success in this contest.

 Comment Written 23-Feb-2022


reply by the author on 24-Feb-2022
    Thank you, John, for the kind words and contest wish. - Wendy
Comment from T B Botts
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Hello Wendy, or do you prefer Rosehill? Wow! What a poem. You captured the hidden costs of what a riot can do to just one building. Much less to an entire town that is devastated by the choices of a few people. The politicians most definitely are culpable for what has happened, as well as the actual rioters. You really hit the nail on the head gal. Well done.
Have a blessed evening.
Tom

 Comment Written 23-Feb-2022


reply by the author on 23-Feb-2022
    Thanks for taking the time to read and review my words. I really appreciate that extra ⭐️