Growing up in a Shadow
and into the light26 total reviews
Comment from dragonpoet
Hi Jesse,
I had to go back this far to find something I didn't review yet. But I think this is true throughout life. We all have to visit our past so we don't keep living it and move past it. We all have the power to be who and what we want to be if we just use that power. It is harder when you are told you are lacking through life. I was picked on when I was young and that has shaped me somewhat. I, like you, have had a hard time standing up for myself.
Keep writing and stay healthy.
Joan
reply by the author on 03-Jan-2024
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Hi Jesse,
I had to go back this far to find something I didn't review yet. But I think this is true throughout life. We all have to visit our past so we don't keep living it and move past it. We all have the power to be who and what we want to be if we just use that power. It is harder when you are told you are lacking through life. I was picked on when I was young and that has shaped me somewhat. I, like you, have had a hard time standing up for myself.
Keep writing and stay healthy.
Joan
Comment Written 03-Jan-2024
reply by the author on 03-Jan-2024
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Thanks, Joan, for the surprise review of a previous story I wrote a long time ago. You honor me with your research into my past accomplishments. Thank you so much.
Yes, it has been hard, but, it has been worth it to increase my abilities to achieve farther than I ever thought possible.
I will keep writing and remain healthy.
Jesse
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You are most kindly welcome, Jesse.
I think being on this site helps everyone.
Joan
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Agreed.
Comment from Carol Hillebrenner
This is very well-written and sad. No one expected much from me either as my head was attached to my left shoulder and my feet weren't right and my first through third grade teacher kept insisting I should be institutionalized. I had surgery for my neck at 7 and refused to be considered different although I was. It's amazing what you can do with determination.
reply by the author on 03-Mar-2022
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This is very well-written and sad. No one expected much from me either as my head was attached to my left shoulder and my feet weren't right and my first through third grade teacher kept insisting I should be institutionalized. I had surgery for my neck at 7 and refused to be considered different although I was. It's amazing what you can do with determination.
Comment Written 02-Mar-2022
reply by the author on 03-Mar-2022
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Wow! What an inspiring confession! For me, it was emotional and psychological abuse from my parents and siblings. What you experienced must've been really tough. Thanks for sharing your story and for the review.
Have a good evening,
Jesse
Comment from Terry Broxson
That is a powerful piece of writing! Karenina is the first person I met on FS. I don't know a whole lot about her, but from what I do know and read she is well respected. I was the oldest of two boys. My brother was four years younger and fortunately for him, my shadow was not very long. Now I am old. My brother died at seventy. I have the distinction of being the oldest male in my family history in both my mother's and father's family. At least back to 1830. I found a way. Forge ahead my friend, you got the right idea! Excellent writing!
reply by the author on 21-Feb-2022
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That is a powerful piece of writing! Karenina is the first person I met on FS. I don't know a whole lot about her, but from what I do know and read she is well respected. I was the oldest of two boys. My brother was four years younger and fortunately for him, my shadow was not very long. Now I am old. My brother died at seventy. I have the distinction of being the oldest male in my family history in both my mother's and father's family. At least back to 1830. I found a way. Forge ahead my friend, you got the right idea! Excellent writing!
Comment Written 17-Feb-2022
reply by the author on 21-Feb-2022
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Thanks, Terry, for sharing your story with me. Yes, Karenina is one of the best on Fan Story. She and I have been friends and inspire each other when time permits us to.
I appreciate that you found a way to step out of your brother's shadows and make your way in the world. Thank you for your encouragement and kind words.
Have a bright and beautiful day,
Jesse
Comment from Michele Harber
Jesse, you're so brave, revealing yourself in your stories as you do. I wonder how many of those so-called "normal" children you supposedly weren't equal to can, today, express themselves in the impassioned way you do, and with such writing talent and skill. Every piece you post proves those early impressions of you incorrect. In terms of skill, and the support of friends who genuinely have your best interests at heart, I suspect some of those earlier critics are now walking in your shadow.
I'm so sorry that you're losing the caregiver with whom you get along so well, but at least he's shown you the best that's out there, so you'll know not to settle for less when you find his replacement. If your stories are any indication, you know yourself well and, I would suspect, well enough to pick the person who will be best for you. All best wishes in your search. I genuinely believe you'll find the right person or people with whom to forge a new and beneficial relationship.
reply by the author on 21-Feb-2022
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Jesse, you're so brave, revealing yourself in your stories as you do. I wonder how many of those so-called "normal" children you supposedly weren't equal to can, today, express themselves in the impassioned way you do, and with such writing talent and skill. Every piece you post proves those early impressions of you incorrect. In terms of skill, and the support of friends who genuinely have your best interests at heart, I suspect some of those earlier critics are now walking in your shadow.
I'm so sorry that you're losing the caregiver with whom you get along so well, but at least he's shown you the best that's out there, so you'll know not to settle for less when you find his replacement. If your stories are any indication, you know yourself well and, I would suspect, well enough to pick the person who will be best for you. All best wishes in your search. I genuinely believe you'll find the right person or people with whom to forge a new and beneficial relationship.
Comment Written 16-Feb-2022
reply by the author on 21-Feb-2022
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Hello Michele. Sorry, I took so long to get back to you after you wrote such a beautiful review...life intervened.
Your analysis of my situation is spot on!
It will be hard to have a new caregiver but as you say I have known the best there is!
David is kind and caring and thoughtful and all the attributes I hope to find in my new caregiver! I too believe I will find the right one it will just take time and I will know it when we gel and bond over time.
Who knows, I might like the new caregiver as much as David! It is doubtful but I try to keep my hopes up.
Have a lovely week, my friend!
Jesse
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Darn that life! It's always getting in the way. 😀
Regarding your caregiver situation, I want to tell you a story about my daughter that may give you hope. She'd had a behavioral therapist that came to our apartment and helped her with homework and cleaning up after herself, and other aspects of daily life. Then the ABA (as such therapists are called) moved, and Leah was devastated. ABA's tend to have rapid turnaround, as this position is just considered a stepping stone to something better, but this last person, Phaedra, stayed the longest, and was even with us during Covid (once the first big surge started to wane and we felt safe), and she and Leah had really bonded. The company we got the woman from had been trying for months to get a replacement, but no one's been willing to "make house calls" due to the pandemic. They finally got us someone new tonight, and my daughter spent the entire day in a panic worrying that she wouldn't like her and would be stuck with someone with whom she didn't get along. Then she met the woman and found out that they shared certain common interests and tastes, and that the woman had two cats (we have one), Leah and the ABA hit it off as though they were old friends. At one point, I asked the woman if we could adopt her as Leah's older sister.
In short (although I think I've outdone "short" by several lines), after losing the person she adored, and going months with no one, we finally got someone who seems as though she'll be perfect for Leah. If my daughter, who is very picky, and a very harsh critic, can find the perfect person, I know you, who appear to be much more easygoing and forgiving, can too. I'll be rooting for you.
You have a lovely week as well.
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Hello Michele. I am sure as well that I will be able to find a new caregiver and I will know when the right one comes along. I am interviewing someone later today and I hope that she is a good 'fit' for this position and will work out just fine. She is eager to work and says she wants to plan out our schedule together. I only hope I like her and that she likes me as well.
Your story does inspire me to believe that I will find someone eventually as long as I keep looking and don't give up. Although, the option of giving up is not an option because David is retiring soon.
Thanks for responding and for taking the time to tell me your daughter's story. I will keep this in mind as I search for caregivers.
Enjoy your day,
Jesse
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I hope the interview today works out well, Jesse. I know you?ll find the person you need, whether it?s her or someone else. I?m glad my story was able to give you a little more confidence. Good luck, and please let me know how the interview goes.
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Thanks for wishing me good luck on the interview! I will definitely let you know how it goes!
Jesse
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I'll be waiting.
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Hi Michele. The interview lasted all of ten minutes as she told me she hasn't any time to work for me. Oh, well. better luck next time.
Jesse
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I'm sorry, but better you found out now than later. We've had a couple of ABAs let us know they hadn't any time to work for us by simply not showing up and not calling. One person, we found out after the fact, missed an appointment to attend a family birthday party. We're not monsters. If she'd told us about the family engagement, we'd have switched her day or simply skipped a session but, instead, she just stood us up. We gave her one more chance but, by the second time, we let her go.
Obviously, the person you met with wasn't the right one for you, but the right person is out there. Just keep looking and keep believing. Thank you for keeping me posted.
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Thank you, Michele, for your confidence boost. I needed to hear that. Keep believing is easier said than done, but I will try my best, that is all I can do.
Thanks for caring,
Jesse
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You're welcome, Jesse. Believe me, I'd given up hoping we'd ever find anyone for Leah but, now that we did, I can say with confidence that anything is possible and you shouldn't lose hope. You will find someone!!!!
Comment from NANCY V. FORREST
Your writing has a realism and an honesty that is compelling and hought provoking. INsight is a precious thing and you work hard to find and present yours. I hope you find the people you need and command your own life. If you make a choice that turns out not to work for you, there is no reason not to make a different. Good luck.
reply by the author on 21-Feb-2022
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Your writing has a realism and an honesty that is compelling and hought provoking. INsight is a precious thing and you work hard to find and present yours. I hope you find the people you need and command your own life. If you make a choice that turns out not to work for you, there is no reason not to make a different. Good luck.
Comment Written 16-Feb-2022
reply by the author on 21-Feb-2022
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Thank you, Nancy, for your great advice! Yes, if the first one doesn't work out then try try again. I will keep looking until I find the right 'fit.' Then I will know by the way we get along how it will be for us. Best wishes and thanks for wishing me good luck!
Jesse
Comment from Pam (respa)
-Thanks for sharing the artwork, notes, and story, Jesse.
-I am glad what Karenina said resonated with you.
-Your wrote this very well, giving insight into your background.
-I think sharing about situations is very helpful and hopefully, you find it that way, too.
-It is a shame how some parents approach their children and issues in life when, in their minds, they are "doing the right thing."
-My advice in selecting caregivers is to try and do whatever background work you can. I don't know if they come from an agency or not. But interviewing, probably by phone in these times, would be helpful as well as asking for a resume and references. You might have all of that figured out.
-Hope it goes well, and you will do a good job because you are on the right path from what I can tell.
reply by the author on 20-Feb-2022
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-Thanks for sharing the artwork, notes, and story, Jesse.
-I am glad what Karenina said resonated with you.
-Your wrote this very well, giving insight into your background.
-I think sharing about situations is very helpful and hopefully, you find it that way, too.
-It is a shame how some parents approach their children and issues in life when, in their minds, they are "doing the right thing."
-My advice in selecting caregivers is to try and do whatever background work you can. I don't know if they come from an agency or not. But interviewing, probably by phone in these times, would be helpful as well as asking for a resume and references. You might have all of that figured out.
-Hope it goes well, and you will do a good job because you are on the right path from what I can tell.
Comment Written 16-Feb-2022
reply by the author on 20-Feb-2022
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Thanks so much, Pam, for this encouraging and reflective review. It is difficult to find new caregivers and I have gone through this before so I know just how hard it can be. I think I will know when I have found the right caregiver when we 'fit' as people and they have a strong work ethic.
Thank you for this exceptional rating and awesome review!
Have a great upcoming week,
Jesse
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You are very welcome for the review and stars, Jesse. It sounds like you are on the right track. You have a good week, too.
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Thanks, Pam. I hope I am on the right track, sometimes, I can see the light at the end of the tunnel, I hope it is not an oncoming train!
Enjoy your week!
Jesse
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You are welcome, Jesse. I hope it's not a train, either!
Comment from Cindy Decker 2
Dear Jesse,
By reading about your plight I am helped to overcome my particular problems. Yet, by remaking strong emotionally and persevering, I believe you will conquer.
Your story is splendidly told and helps others.
Good luck in everything you do.
Blessings,
Cindy
reply by the author on 16-Feb-2022
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Dear Jesse,
By reading about your plight I am helped to overcome my particular problems. Yet, by remaking strong emotionally and persevering, I believe you will conquer.
Your story is splendidly told and helps others.
Good luck in everything you do.
Blessings,
Cindy
Comment Written 16-Feb-2022
reply by the author on 16-Feb-2022
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Thank you so much, Cindy. I am glad that writing about my bad experiences has helped you to overcome yours. Thanks for the encouragement. I too believe that I will conquer my past and achieve my goals. I appreciate your kind words and thank you for your wishes of good luck. I hope as you say, that I have helped others with similar experiences.
Have a wonderful rest of your week,
Jesse
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You?re welcome, Jesse.
Comment from Mrs. KT
Good morning, Jesse!
Goodness!
Your essay is gut-wrenching.
Aside from the message of your well-crafted narrative, a message that many individuals need to hear, your thoughts progress fluidly. One of your best offerings, my friend, despite the heartbreaking circumstances.
Thank you for sharing!
diane
reply by the author on 16-Feb-2022
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Good morning, Jesse!
Goodness!
Your essay is gut-wrenching.
Aside from the message of your well-crafted narrative, a message that many individuals need to hear, your thoughts progress fluidly. One of your best offerings, my friend, despite the heartbreaking circumstances.
Thank you for sharing!
diane
Comment Written 15-Feb-2022
reply by the author on 16-Feb-2022
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Good evening, Diane! I am sorry for the late response but after a wonderful review like yours, I am at a loss for words! When I wrote this I had no idea people would respond so positively! It was cathartic to write and yes, gut-wrenching as well. Your kind comments touch my heart.
Thank you so much for giving me the lift I need to keep on writing these personal essays!
Jesse
Comment from PoemsOfDD
I enjoyed reading this personal account of your past and present life and situations. I believe if you forge ahead with a positive mind, positivity will attract itself to you. And if the answer doesn't come straight away, it was the wrong answer and the right one is around the corner. It can be daunting going out of one's comfort zone. But, at times, we must - in order to learn and experience new beginnings. Trust you are being watched over and have faith.
Thank you for sharing this story. I appreciated where it took my train of thoughts. xx
reply by the author on 21-Feb-2022
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I enjoyed reading this personal account of your past and present life and situations. I believe if you forge ahead with a positive mind, positivity will attract itself to you. And if the answer doesn't come straight away, it was the wrong answer and the right one is around the corner. It can be daunting going out of one's comfort zone. But, at times, we must - in order to learn and experience new beginnings. Trust you are being watched over and have faith.
Thank you for sharing this story. I appreciated where it took my train of thoughts. xx
Comment Written 15-Feb-2022
reply by the author on 21-Feb-2022
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Thanks, DD, for the inspiring and encouraging review. I am glad you enjoyed reading this. Going out of one's comfort zone is a good way of putting it. Yes, I am surely doing that. I am happy this essay took your train of thoughts in a good place. Thanks for your kind comments and have a wonderful day,
Jesse
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
Many people lack the confidence to allow themselves to shine and it is a pity that this has happened to you, but now that you are revealing your story here Jesse, you can shine in your own right and allow others to benefit from your words, a joy to read, let your talent shine Jesse, love Dolly x
reply by the author on 21-Feb-2022
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Many people lack the confidence to allow themselves to shine and it is a pity that this has happened to you, but now that you are revealing your story here Jesse, you can shine in your own right and allow others to benefit from your words, a joy to read, let your talent shine Jesse, love Dolly x
Comment Written 15-Feb-2022
reply by the author on 21-Feb-2022
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Thank you, Dolly, for encouraging me to let my talent and confidence shine. It is my hope that others will benefit from my sad experience and learn that they too can go beyond their limitations and shine!
Have a lovely day,
Jesse