For Children
Viewing comments for Chapter 2 "Gerry Giraffe and Ellie Elephant"Little stories for children in rhyme
47 total reviews
Comment from Jeff Flaig
I guess you are working on the book. You've certainly painted the pictures with your words. Only thing I would like to mention is the last two lines of the 3rd stanza don't rhyme. That's inconsistent with the other stanzas.
Although I think it is a good story and will resonate with young children. They just happen to be our most important audience.
Good Job!
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2022
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I guess you are working on the book. You've certainly painted the pictures with your words. Only thing I would like to mention is the last two lines of the 3rd stanza don't rhyme. That's inconsistent with the other stanzas.
Although I think it is a good story and will resonate with young children. They just happen to be our most important audience.
Good Job!
Comment Written 06-Feb-2022
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2022
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Thank you so much for reading my children's poem, Jeff. I checked that stanza, but it rhymes perfectly to me, I think it's down to the different ways the English and American's pronouce words. This is UK English. Thank you again! :))
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She saw they were lonely and had an idea,
You say 'idea' differently?
Anyway, good write.
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idea = i de/ar, we have three syllables for that word. That makes such a difference when it comes to poetry and pronounciation. I've often been confused with American poetry, some words just don't seem to rhyme. I'm now trying to say it as you would, and a lot of my reviewers are doing the same with me. It's a complicated world! xx
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Thanks for responding, and I get the "Ideer"...;-)
Have a great day, keep writing...
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Lol! Thank you. xx
Comment from pookietoo
A cute poem and very nice entry for the children's poetry contest. i wish you a lot of luck in the contest. Best wishes and keep smiling. Have a wonderful day.
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2022
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A cute poem and very nice entry for the children's poetry contest. i wish you a lot of luck in the contest. Best wishes and keep smiling. Have a wonderful day.
Comment Written 06-Feb-2022
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2022
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Thank you!
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Welcome.
Comment from PoemsOfDD
Who wouldn't appreciate that picture... it is bright and joyful. Two best pals sharing time :-) I particularly love that this poem has a moral to the story. We are all different and friends comes in all shapes, sizes and shades. A great addition for a poetry book for children. We are never truly alone. Thank you and enjoy the six shower.
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2022
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Who wouldn't appreciate that picture... it is bright and joyful. Two best pals sharing time :-) I particularly love that this poem has a moral to the story. We are all different and friends comes in all shapes, sizes and shades. A great addition for a poetry book for children. We are never truly alone. Thank you and enjoy the six shower.
Comment Written 06-Feb-2022
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2022
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Thank you so much for this lovely review, and the golden star! I really appreciate them both. :))
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
A fine children's rhyming poem filled with friendship, and the only thing that matters is that fine connection when making friends, I adored the sentiment here, love Dolly x
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2022
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A fine children's rhyming poem filled with friendship, and the only thing that matters is that fine connection when making friends, I adored the sentiment here, love Dolly x
Comment Written 06-Feb-2022
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2022
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Thank you so much, Dolly!
Comment from Wendy G
What a wonderful children's poem. Beautifully thought thrrrrough and very well written. It's a theme that would appeal to children, it's writtenin an engaging style and has smooth metre and rhyme. Best wishes for your clever entry.
Wendy
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2022
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What a wonderful children's poem. Beautifully thought thrrrrough and very well written. It's a theme that would appeal to children, it's writtenin an engaging style and has smooth metre and rhyme. Best wishes for your clever entry.
Wendy
Comment Written 06-Feb-2022
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2022
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Thank you so much, Wendy!
Comment from jenintorre
This is a delightful childrens poem. I think you have a winner her. I spotted a typo:- spled (spied). I wish you lots of luck in the competition. Best wishes. Jen.
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2022
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This is a delightful childrens poem. I think you have a winner her. I spotted a typo:- spled (spied). I wish you lots of luck in the competition. Best wishes. Jen.
Comment Written 06-Feb-2022
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2022
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Thank you, Jen! I'll check the typo, thanks for pointing it out! Have a lovely day. :))
Comment from sue133
A lovely, well thought out childrens' poem. The rhyming is perfect and the message is really good for children...always be kind and friendly to others.
I wish you good luck in the competition.
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2022
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A lovely, well thought out childrens' poem. The rhyming is perfect and the message is really good for children...always be kind and friendly to others.
I wish you good luck in the competition.
Comment Written 05-Feb-2022
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2022
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Thank you, Sue! xx
Comment from Teri7
This is a very cute and very well written childrens poem you have penned about Gerry Giraffe and Ellie Elephant. You used very cute descriptive words that would make a child smile. Very good imagery from the art work you chose. Best wises in the contest. Teri
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2022
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This is a very cute and very well written childrens poem you have penned about Gerry Giraffe and Ellie Elephant. You used very cute descriptive words that would make a child smile. Very good imagery from the art work you chose. Best wises in the contest. Teri
Comment Written 05-Feb-2022
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2022
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Thank you, Teri!
Comment from duchessofdrumborg
' Gerry Giraffe and Ellie Elephant ' , is an exceptionally well-written and delightfully descriptive piece. With craft and skill. This talented poet has told it as it is. This is definitely a six :))))) Good luck with the contest. Please let me know how you get on?
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2022
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' Gerry Giraffe and Ellie Elephant ' , is an exceptionally well-written and delightfully descriptive piece. With craft and skill. This talented poet has told it as it is. This is definitely a six :))))) Good luck with the contest. Please let me know how you get on?
Comment Written 05-Feb-2022
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2022
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Thank you so very much, Duchess, for this fabulous review and the golden star! I do appreciate them. And thank you for the good luck wishes! :)) xx
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My dear pen-pushing friend. You certainly deserved the fabulous review.
Bless you and take care,
the Duchess :)))) xx
Comment from Marty Swan
The rhyme scheme was good, the overall rhythm could be better in places. However, the overall story was delightful and pleasant to read. My eleven-year old daughter would especially love this one. Her favorite animal is a giraffe.
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2022
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The rhyme scheme was good, the overall rhythm could be better in places. However, the overall story was delightful and pleasant to read. My eleven-year old daughter would especially love this one. Her favorite animal is a giraffe.
Comment Written 05-Feb-2022
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2022
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Thank you, Marty, I'll check that out and see if I can improve it after the contest is over. I'm glad your daughter would like it. :)) xx
