Peacock and Toad
What do you do when you go the wrong way?5 total reviews
Comment from zanya
Toad and Peacock are trying to tell us something here as they amble along and share some philosophical exchanges, the dialogue is excellent and the required words merge effortlessly- has my vote
reply by the author on 30-Jan-2022
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Toad and Peacock are trying to tell us something here as they amble along and share some philosophical exchanges, the dialogue is excellent and the required words merge effortlessly- has my vote
Comment Written 30-Jan-2022
reply by the author on 30-Jan-2022
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Thank you for your kind review and generous rating. The vote says how much you like it so thank you for that as well.
Comment from Tom Horonzy
very nice and enlightening for those who choose the right rather than to reap the consequence. Learnt that long ago in Primary and have it burnt in my heart for eternity... I hope.
reply by the author on 30-Jan-2022
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very nice and enlightening for those who choose the right rather than to reap the consequence. Learnt that long ago in Primary and have it burnt in my heart for eternity... I hope.
Comment Written 30-Jan-2022
reply by the author on 30-Jan-2022
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Thank you for your kind review and generous rating.
Comment from LisaMay
In this story poem you have integrated the required contest words seamlessly; your rhyming and rhythm lead the reader through it, following the discussion between peacock and toad that reveals very good advice.
I think easier reading might result by breaking the poem up into more stanzas, such as beginning new ones at the lines: "In silence they traveled" and "But the peacock was puzzled" and "Toad stopped his hopping"
reply by the author on 28-Jan-2022
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In this story poem you have integrated the required contest words seamlessly; your rhyming and rhythm lead the reader through it, following the discussion between peacock and toad that reveals very good advice.
I think easier reading might result by breaking the poem up into more stanzas, such as beginning new ones at the lines: "In silence they traveled" and "But the peacock was puzzled" and "Toad stopped his hopping"
Comment Written 28-Jan-2022
reply by the author on 28-Jan-2022
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Thank you for your insight. I wondered the same thing about stanzas. I am going to follow your advice and change them. Thank you.
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:)))
Comment from Chris Davies
That's a very clever poem! You've not only captured the necessary words but given us a moral. I'm so impressed. Wish you the best luck with the contest. I'll concede defeat as I write.
reply by the author on 28-Jan-2022
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That's a very clever poem! You've not only captured the necessary words but given us a moral. I'm so impressed. Wish you the best luck with the contest. I'll concede defeat as I write.
Comment Written 28-Jan-2022
reply by the author on 28-Jan-2022
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Thank you for your kind review and very generous rating. Don't concede... I don't mind losing to a better poem.
Comment from Debra White
Hello :)
I really enjoyed reading your rhymed story poem. I love a good moral!
Lovely story telling with wisdom and humour rolled into one. Near perfect meter and rhyme.
Good luck in the voting booth.
Best wishes, Debra
reply by the author on 28-Jan-2022
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Hello :)
I really enjoyed reading your rhymed story poem. I love a good moral!
Lovely story telling with wisdom and humour rolled into one. Near perfect meter and rhyme.
Good luck in the voting booth.
Best wishes, Debra
Comment Written 28-Jan-2022
reply by the author on 28-Jan-2022
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Thank you so much for your words of encouragement.
