A Rainy Day in May
My fun story for kids with lots of phonics and phonemes.2 total reviews
Comment from Aubree Lorraine
It's a sweet story. Descriptive enough that it would illustrate well as a children's story. Some of the sentence structure is awkward. One example is "Fay gave a sandwich to Gail on a tray." "Fay gave Gail a sandwich on a tray" sounds more natural. Or even, "To Gail Fay gave a sandwich on a tray" if you wanted to play with the cadence.
Overall, it's a good story with simple, distinct transitions for children.
reply by the author on 27-Dec-2021
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It's a sweet story. Descriptive enough that it would illustrate well as a children's story. Some of the sentence structure is awkward. One example is "Fay gave a sandwich to Gail on a tray." "Fay gave Gail a sandwich on a tray" sounds more natural. Or even, "To Gail Fay gave a sandwich on a tray" if you wanted to play with the cadence.
Overall, it's a good story with simple, distinct transitions for children.
Comment Written 26-Dec-2021
reply by the author on 27-Dec-2021
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Hi Aubree Lorraine! Thanks for the feedback. I appreciate that you took the time to ready my story. Have blessed New Year!
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
That was a lovely story about being kind to people, and Fay did brighten Gail's day. But it also gives a lesson of telling your mum and dad where you're going so they don't worry. Well done and good luck in the contest! Happy Christmas!! :)) Sandra
reply by the author on 25-Dec-2021
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That was a lovely story about being kind to people, and Fay did brighten Gail's day. But it also gives a lesson of telling your mum and dad where you're going so they don't worry. Well done and good luck in the contest! Happy Christmas!! :)) Sandra
Comment Written 25-Dec-2021
reply by the author on 25-Dec-2021
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Hi sandramitchell! Thank you for the feedback, excellent review, and good luck wishes. Have a blessed and Merry Christmas too!
