Baker Street
An Afternoon at the Local Library7 total reviews
Comment from writer723
I really enjoyed reading your very entertaining story. It had all of the elements that a great ghost story needs. It was, to me, spooky yet humorous and engaging from beginning to end. Your writing talent is evident in the way your words flow so smoothly. Congratulations on the win!
reply by the author on 27-Dec-2021
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I really enjoyed reading your very entertaining story. It had all of the elements that a great ghost story needs. It was, to me, spooky yet humorous and engaging from beginning to end. Your writing talent is evident in the way your words flow so smoothly. Congratulations on the win!
Comment Written 27-Dec-2021
reply by the author on 27-Dec-2021
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Thank you for your review and thoughts. I appreciate your input.
Tirzah
Comment from GollyGreen32
Hi! I enjoyed your story, but there two reasons I gave it a four. The first reason is that I wanted a bit more back story about the ghost, for example, a hint as to why she haunted a library. The second reason is that the story is almost all dialog between the girls. I wanted to see more from the ghost's perspective. You have some of her views in this story, but there should be more of it. I loved your ending, though. Have blessed and Merry Christmas!
reply by the author on 23-Dec-2021
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Hi! I enjoyed your story, but there two reasons I gave it a four. The first reason is that I wanted a bit more back story about the ghost, for example, a hint as to why she haunted a library. The second reason is that the story is almost all dialog between the girls. I wanted to see more from the ghost's perspective. You have some of her views in this story, but there should be more of it. I loved your ending, though. Have blessed and Merry Christmas!
Comment Written 22-Dec-2021
reply by the author on 23-Dec-2021
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Thank you for your review and opinion regarding my work. I would like to suggest you watch a YouTube video - it helps to explain what I was doing within my story.
https://youtu.be/jpWKp-fnZuU
Perhaps this will help you with your writing adventures. :)
Thank you and Good Luck!
Comment from robyn corum
Dear Mystery Writer,
You know what? I really liked this - it was so different! You gave us a whole different take on the 'ghost' concept. This lady who thinks she just happened to walk in and watch two little girls playing and two little girls who are summoning this ghost on the Ouiji board - it was two sides of the coin with neither being truly aware of the other. Nicely, nicely done. I haven't read any of the other entries yet, but I am extremely pleased with yours. Good luck!
reply by the author on 27-Dec-2021
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Dear Mystery Writer,
You know what? I really liked this - it was so different! You gave us a whole different take on the 'ghost' concept. This lady who thinks she just happened to walk in and watch two little girls playing and two little girls who are summoning this ghost on the Ouiji board - it was two sides of the coin with neither being truly aware of the other. Nicely, nicely done. I haven't read any of the other entries yet, but I am extremely pleased with yours. Good luck!
Comment Written 22-Dec-2021
reply by the author on 27-Dec-2021
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Thank you for your review and thoughts. I appreciate your input.
Tirzah
Comment from Mary Shifman
This is a good story and I enjoyed reading it. At first it isn't clear that the woman who is watching the girls is a ghost and I was a little surprised. Is the woman Rose, or is Rose a different manifestation?
reply by the author on 27-Dec-2021
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This is a good story and I enjoyed reading it. At first it isn't clear that the woman who is watching the girls is a ghost and I was a little surprised. Is the woman Rose, or is Rose a different manifestation?
Comment Written 19-Dec-2021
reply by the author on 27-Dec-2021
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Thank you for your review and thoughts. I appreciate your input.
Tirzah
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You are most welcome.
Comment from royowen
I love this type of story, if the hairs on the back of your neck, you know you've heard a good ghost story. Beautifully written, plotted, with great characters and you did a great job, well done, blessings Roy
reply by the author on 27-Dec-2021
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I love this type of story, if the hairs on the back of your neck, you know you've heard a good ghost story. Beautifully written, plotted, with great characters and you did a great job, well done, blessings Roy
Comment Written 19-Dec-2021
reply by the author on 27-Dec-2021
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Thank you for your review and thoughts. I appreciate your input.
Tirzah
Comment from Susan Newell
This is an interesting twist -- to have the spirit appear and participate in the curiosity of the game. The surprise ending was that Rose thought she was there physically, but the girls had to guess that she left. Personally, I stay away frm Ouija boards and all the dark arts. I've made some notes:
as two girls, giggled ==> two girls giggled
The woman stared at the table, why have you stopped playing? I want to see how this silly game is played. -- this is confusing. An indication that these are thoughts would be helpful.
reply by the author on 27-Dec-2021
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This is an interesting twist -- to have the spirit appear and participate in the curiosity of the game. The surprise ending was that Rose thought she was there physically, but the girls had to guess that she left. Personally, I stay away frm Ouija boards and all the dark arts. I've made some notes:
as two girls, giggled ==> two girls giggled
The woman stared at the table, why have you stopped playing? I want to see how this silly game is played. -- this is confusing. An indication that these are thoughts would be helpful.
Comment Written 19-Dec-2021
reply by the author on 27-Dec-2021
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Thank you for your review and thoughts. I appreciate your input.
Tirzah
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You are welcome.
Comment from humpwhistle
You had me going there, for a moment. I thought your 'ghost' might have been Sherlock Holmes--as his famous residence was 221B Baker Street.
I could see the ghost of Holmes hanging out at a library, and having some devilish fun two little girls.
Interest Ouija story. I like your use of dialogue to carry the story.
Best of luck.
Peace, Lee
reply by the author on 27-Dec-2021
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You had me going there, for a moment. I thought your 'ghost' might have been Sherlock Holmes--as his famous residence was 221B Baker Street.
I could see the ghost of Holmes hanging out at a library, and having some devilish fun two little girls.
Interest Ouija story. I like your use of dialogue to carry the story.
Best of luck.
Peace, Lee
Comment Written 19-Dec-2021
reply by the author on 27-Dec-2021
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Thank you for your review and thoughts. I appreciate your input.
Tirzah
