A Request
Asking God for an extension44 total reviews
Comment from duchessofdrumborg
' A Request ' , is an exceptionally well-written and heart-wrenching piece. It was a privilege to read and review this talented poet's work. To me this is definitely a six. I look forward to seeing your next post.
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2021
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' A Request ' , is an exceptionally well-written and heart-wrenching piece. It was a privilege to read and review this talented poet's work. To me this is definitely a six. I look forward to seeing your next post.
Comment Written 29-Nov-2021
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2021
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Thanks, Duchess. You are too kind.
Paul McFarland, you're very welcome.
Bless you and take care.
the Duchess
Comment from dellsworthpoet
The poem stays on point. The words fit the subject. The rhyme scheme is consistent. The flow is good. The conclusion follows from the text and ends the poem well.
Suggestion:
The current trend in formatting poems is to punctuate them the same as in prose. Which means caps at sentence start and for proper nouns only. This makes it easier for the reader to follow the intended grammar structures.
A good read. Thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2021
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The poem stays on point. The words fit the subject. The rhyme scheme is consistent. The flow is good. The conclusion follows from the text and ends the poem well.
Suggestion:
The current trend in formatting poems is to punctuate them the same as in prose. Which means caps at sentence start and for proper nouns only. This makes it easier for the reader to follow the intended grammar structures.
A good read. Thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 29-Nov-2021
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2021
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Thanks, Dellsworth, for the review and suggestion. Can the old school stay with the old rule?
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As per usual the rules are bendable. After all poetic license and all that.
Comment from dragonpoet
Paul,
This is a heartfelt, well rhymed prayer we all should pray. If we could all atone for the sins we commited here, before death, then we might not have to worry about purgatory, if you still believe in it.
Good luck in the contest.
Keep writing and stay healthy
Joan
reply by the author on 29-Nov-2021
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Paul,
This is a heartfelt, well rhymed prayer we all should pray. If we could all atone for the sins we commited here, before death, then we might not have to worry about purgatory, if you still believe in it.
Good luck in the contest.
Keep writing and stay healthy
Joan
Comment Written 29-Nov-2021
reply by the author on 29-Nov-2021
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Thanks, Joan. I don't know about purgatory. I think it's probably just up or down.
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YOu're welcome. I thought maybe up or stay here. Some say life is hell
Joan
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
A fine faithful and humble prayer Paul and your words are from the heart. I like your profile picture and I now know what you look like. A well metered and rhythmic poem, much enjoyed and good luck with the contest, love Dolly x
reply by the author on 29-Nov-2021
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A fine faithful and humble prayer Paul and your words are from the heart. I like your profile picture and I now know what you look like. A well metered and rhythmic poem, much enjoyed and good luck with the contest, love Dolly x
Comment Written 29-Nov-2021
reply by the author on 29-Nov-2021
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Thanks, Dolly. Always look forward to your reviews.
Comment from Teri7
This is a very nice and well written prayer poem you have penned for the My Faith contest. You used very good heartfelt words that probably so many could say and ask the Lord for. Best wishes in the contest. Teri
reply by the author on 29-Nov-2021
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This is a very nice and well written prayer poem you have penned for the My Faith contest. You used very good heartfelt words that probably so many could say and ask the Lord for. Best wishes in the contest. Teri
Comment Written 29-Nov-2021
reply by the author on 29-Nov-2021
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Thanks, Teri. I just need a little more time.
Comment from Mary Vigasin
This is a very personal and private and beautiful written prayer. It is written with great humility and faith.
Good luck in the contest.
Best wishes,
Mary
reply by the author on 29-Nov-2021
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This is a very personal and private and beautiful written prayer. It is written with great humility and faith.
Good luck in the contest.
Best wishes,
Mary
Comment Written 29-Nov-2021
reply by the author on 29-Nov-2021
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Thanks, Mary. Good to hear from you.
Comment from Tina Crute
This poem deserves to be decorated with stars, not just for the perfect beat of the rhyme, but for the message also. What a humble and focused perspective to right your wrongs with God's help! It shows gratefulness and remorse and desire to serve. Well done. I would vote for this!
Tina
reply by the author on 29-Nov-2021
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This poem deserves to be decorated with stars, not just for the perfect beat of the rhyme, but for the message also. What a humble and focused perspective to right your wrongs with God's help! It shows gratefulness and remorse and desire to serve. Well done. I would vote for this!
Tina
Comment Written 29-Nov-2021
reply by the author on 29-Nov-2021
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Thanks, Tina, for the review and kind words.
Comment from Seshadri_Sreenivasan
Keep walking the right path and try to spread love. God is always there with you unseen and He will bless you, gently and lovingly. I loved the poem. Very spiritual. Thanks for sharing! Good luck!
reply by the author on 29-Nov-2021
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Keep walking the right path and try to spread love. God is always there with you unseen and He will bless you, gently and lovingly. I loved the poem. Very spiritual. Thanks for sharing! Good luck!
Comment Written 29-Nov-2021
reply by the author on 29-Nov-2021
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Thanks, Seshadri. I know he's there and listening, and it's up to him to grant my wish or not.
Comment from Sherry Asbury
So humble and faith-filled...this poem is wonderful and could only have been written by a True Believer! It is a prayer I or anyone could use, for "we have all sinned and come short of the Glory of God"
Bless you, for blessing us with this flawless work!
reply by the author on 29-Nov-2021
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So humble and faith-filled...this poem is wonderful and could only have been written by a True Believer! It is a prayer I or anyone could use, for "we have all sinned and come short of the Glory of God"
Bless you, for blessing us with this flawless work!
Comment Written 29-Nov-2021
reply by the author on 29-Nov-2021
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Thanks, Sherry. Got to do something about the sinning.
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LOL, but not really!
Comment from Lloyd T. Okoko
The objective correlative of the poem reminisces a repentant protagonist on the verge of atonement with God.
The work highlights his quest for succour with minimal forays in sin; his quest for guidance and empowerment to help his kith and kin; forgiveness for straying from God's part and the quest to keep him much longer on earth.
The work earns its texture through the effective use of metaphors, rhymes and and an array of anecdotes supportive of his plea.
Excellent work. Bravo.
reply by the author on 29-Nov-2021
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The objective correlative of the poem reminisces a repentant protagonist on the verge of atonement with God.
The work highlights his quest for succour with minimal forays in sin; his quest for guidance and empowerment to help his kith and kin; forgiveness for straying from God's part and the quest to keep him much longer on earth.
The work earns its texture through the effective use of metaphors, rhymes and and an array of anecdotes supportive of his plea.
Excellent work. Bravo.
Comment Written 29-Nov-2021
reply by the author on 29-Nov-2021
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Thanks, Lloyd. Great analysis.
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Remain Blessed.
