Rumble to the Rescue
It is fortunate that some plans are not realised.30 total reviews
Comment from Lloyd T. Okoko
The objective correlative of the story reminisces a swift rescue operation for Jim carried out in a jiffy, much thanks to the turning around for the better facilitated by the happy bark of Rumble.
The work highlights a seemingly helpless situation that was turned around by Rumble.
The work earns its texture though its strict compliance of the 75 Words Flash Fiction Contest specification.
Excellent work. Bravo.
reply by the author on 01-Dec-2021
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The objective correlative of the story reminisces a swift rescue operation for Jim carried out in a jiffy, much thanks to the turning around for the better facilitated by the happy bark of Rumble.
The work highlights a seemingly helpless situation that was turned around by Rumble.
The work earns its texture though its strict compliance of the 75 Words Flash Fiction Contest specification.
Excellent work. Bravo.
Comment Written 01-Dec-2021
reply by the author on 01-Dec-2021
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Thanks Lloyd for taking the time to review my contest entry. I have been happy with the reception it has received. Take care and have a good day.
Cheers
Barry
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Remain Blessed.
Comment from Jeff Watkins
I'm glad you are dusting off some of your writings, Barry. It is difficult to produce a well written 75 word story of substance, but you have succeeded. I knew two people who committed suicide, and I will never know what could have saved them, if anything.
One basic human is the need to be needed, and your story exemplifies that aspect of human nature.
The reversal of momentum is skillfully accomplished. I don't agree that you need more paragraphs. The first paragraph moves toward suicide and the second paragraph decides for life. That's all the subdivisions you need.
Jeff
reply by the author on 24-Nov-2021
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I'm glad you are dusting off some of your writings, Barry. It is difficult to produce a well written 75 word story of substance, but you have succeeded. I knew two people who committed suicide, and I will never know what could have saved them, if anything.
One basic human is the need to be needed, and your story exemplifies that aspect of human nature.
The reversal of momentum is skillfully accomplished. I don't agree that you need more paragraphs. The first paragraph moves toward suicide and the second paragraph decides for life. That's all the subdivisions you need.
Jeff
Comment Written 23-Nov-2021
reply by the author on 24-Nov-2021
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Jeff, Thanks very much for your review of my entry and the six stars.
Yes I have known people who have committed suicide. Always a lot of questions and no real answers.
Please take care and thanks again. Barry
Comment from Susan Newell
You have made good use of your seventy-five words. Dogs have always been unique saviors in more ways than one, and hope is never lost when a person can set aside their own troubles and wishes to take care of another creature.
reply by the author on 23-Nov-2021
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You have made good use of your seventy-five words. Dogs have always been unique saviors in more ways than one, and hope is never lost when a person can set aside their own troubles and wishes to take care of another creature.
Comment Written 21-Nov-2021
reply by the author on 23-Nov-2021
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Susan,
Thanks for taking the time to review my flash fiction entry. Yes many dogs have a sixth sense when their owner is in trouble.Take Care.
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Welcome.
Comment from prettybluebirds
I love this one. Sometimes an animal can sense when things are not right too. The dog probably knew his human was upset and needed him. Your short story is well-written. It's not easy to tell a story with so few words but you mastered it. Wishing you all the best in the contest.
reply by the author on 23-Nov-2021
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I love this one. Sometimes an animal can sense when things are not right too. The dog probably knew his human was upset and needed him. Your short story is well-written. It's not easy to tell a story with so few words but you mastered it. Wishing you all the best in the contest.
Comment Written 20-Nov-2021
reply by the author on 23-Nov-2021
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Thanks for taking the time to review my entry into the flash fiction contest. Will see how it all goes . Take Care
Comment from royowen
I think you're right, one may may not value themself, but that's only the measure, or lack of self love. Too many souls break other's hearts by suicide, a close friend did that in my teens, a much valued friend, beautifully written Barry, blessings Roy
reply by the author on 23-Nov-2021
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I think you're right, one may may not value themself, but that's only the measure, or lack of self love. Too many souls break other's hearts by suicide, a close friend did that in my teens, a much valued friend, beautifully written Barry, blessings Roy
Comment Written 20-Nov-2021
reply by the author on 23-Nov-2021
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Roy, once again thanks for taking time to read my Flash Fiction entry.
Yes, suicide is a dark story but only too real. Just a congratulations from me to you about your writings. Have been reading a few of yours and thumbs up to your efforts. I too have kept a lot of my writings secret until recently . Good to get them out and dust them off so to speak and venture into new territory as well. All the best to you and your family.
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You?re doing well Barry
Comment from SimianSavant
This is a great entry into the contest. Just a few small edits: check your spacing with your periods at the ends and beginnings of sentences.
Also try a paragraph break before this text:
Certain death.
Nothing in his pockets.
A last deep breath.
Ready.
Thanks for the read and good luck in the contest!
reply by the author on 23-Nov-2021
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This is a great entry into the contest. Just a few small edits: check your spacing with your periods at the ends and beginnings of sentences.
Also try a paragraph break before this text:
Certain death.
Nothing in his pockets.
A last deep breath.
Ready.
Thanks for the read and good luck in the contest!
Comment Written 19-Nov-2021
reply by the author on 23-Nov-2021
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Thanks so much for taking time to read my entry into the Flash Fiction contest. Also your suggestions as to improvement are great . Never thought of the paragraph breaks. It does intensify the mood.
You have a great day and take care.
Comment from Jannypan (Jan)
Yes, dogs know and are smarter than what people believe. Good for Rumble! I enjoyed your contest entry. Your lines read smooth with good flow. The ending was unexpected, but great.
Best wishes in the contest.
Respectfully, Jan
reply by the author on 23-Nov-2021
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Yes, dogs know and are smarter than what people believe. Good for Rumble! I enjoyed your contest entry. Your lines read smooth with good flow. The ending was unexpected, but great.
Best wishes in the contest.
Respectfully, Jan
Comment Written 19-Nov-2021
reply by the author on 23-Nov-2021
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Jan,
Thanks for taking time to review my entry into the 75 word Flash Fiction contest. I am glad you liked it and lets hope it will go well in the competition. Have a good day and take care.
Comment from Eunice Amero
He much had missed him. A dog isnt dumb. I like the name rumble. Surely this guy wasnt going to jump over the railing. Good thing rumble come. Good work. Good luck.
reply by the author on 23-Nov-2021
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He much had missed him. A dog isnt dumb. I like the name rumble. Surely this guy wasnt going to jump over the railing. Good thing rumble come. Good work. Good luck.
Comment Written 19-Nov-2021
reply by the author on 23-Nov-2021
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Eunice, thanks for your review and I agree that a dog is not dumb. Yes the name Rumble just came to me while I was putting this together. Have a good day and take care.
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You to and you are welcome.
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You to and you are welcome.
Comment from Mary Kay Bonfante
"It's a wonderful life, Jim!" Maybe an angel sent Rumble running after him. "And besides, who's gonna take care of me?"
Your beautiful story reminds me a little of that famous movie, when the main character is about to jump off a bridge, but is stopped by an angel, who shows him what the world would look like, without his influence and presence.
The yappy dog doesn't do all that, of course, but he does get Jim's attention, and somehow prevents a tragedy. Maybe he's saying, "My human's in trouble!"
I love what you wrote in your Author's Notes, and your Description line is good, too.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 23-Nov-2021
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"It's a wonderful life, Jim!" Maybe an angel sent Rumble running after him. "And besides, who's gonna take care of me?"
Your beautiful story reminds me a little of that famous movie, when the main character is about to jump off a bridge, but is stopped by an angel, who shows him what the world would look like, without his influence and presence.
The yappy dog doesn't do all that, of course, but he does get Jim's attention, and somehow prevents a tragedy. Maybe he's saying, "My human's in trouble!"
I love what you wrote in your Author's Notes, and your Description line is good, too.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 19-Nov-2021
reply by the author on 23-Nov-2021
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Mary Kay,
Thanks for taking time to review my entry into the Flash Fiction Contest. Dogs do have a sixth sense when something is not right with their human. Suicide is a dark subject but unfortunately so real.
You take care and have a great day.
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You're very welcome, Barry. Yes, dogs can be downright heroic.
You have a great day, too. God bless you. - Mary Kay
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Yes I was pretty well raised by a big Labrador. Totally awesome. My mum did a great job as well. Cheers
Comment from Robert Trudel
Very scary. Well done. Yes, sometimes we also get help from unexpected sources. Sometimes we do have black thoughts, there is just no tomorrow to speak of but somehow the clouds open up and we see the sun. It may be just a smile from a stranger and we are on the up and up again.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 23-Nov-2021
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Very scary. Well done. Yes, sometimes we also get help from unexpected sources. Sometimes we do have black thoughts, there is just no tomorrow to speak of but somehow the clouds open up and we see the sun. It may be just a smile from a stranger and we are on the up and up again.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 19-Nov-2021
reply by the author on 23-Nov-2021
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Robert,
Thanks for taking the time to review my entry . Suicide is a dark subject but unfortunately too real. You are correct in that it can only take a smile or conversation from a stranger to open up the world again.
Please take care and enjoy the day.
