Trick And Treat
Two girls get a Happy trick with their treat.3 total reviews
Comment from writer723
This is a cute and fun story for children. I enjoyed your descriptions and the atmosphere you created with your words. The tale was spooky, yet not overtly scary, which is perfect for the little ones. You expressed the scenario very well. Great job!
reply by the author on 18-Oct-2021
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This is a cute and fun story for children. I enjoyed your descriptions and the atmosphere you created with your words. The tale was spooky, yet not overtly scary, which is perfect for the little ones. You expressed the scenario very well. Great job!
Comment Written 18-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 18-Oct-2021
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Thank you so much for your comments and your review. I do remember when my son was only two and we went to the mall to trick-or-treat and he was scared of all the people.
Comment from J.Lancaster
I enjoyed this spooky little tale. It's so cute!
However, you seem to flip between third person and first person right around this line:
Every year mommy lets me go to the store and pick out my favorite candy so that I can share it with the other kids.
Before, in the beginning of your short story, you were writing in third person:
Kimmy and her friend Vicki were getting ready to go trick-or-treating.
I don't know if this is intentional or not, just letting you know. If it isn't intentional, you might want to add quotation marks around the first person text. Thank you for your lovely story!
reply by the author on 18-Oct-2021
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I enjoyed this spooky little tale. It's so cute!
However, you seem to flip between third person and first person right around this line:
Every year mommy lets me go to the store and pick out my favorite candy so that I can share it with the other kids.
Before, in the beginning of your short story, you were writing in third person:
Kimmy and her friend Vicki were getting ready to go trick-or-treating.
I don't know if this is intentional or not, just letting you know. If it isn't intentional, you might want to add quotation marks around the first person text. Thank you for your lovely story!
Comment Written 17-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 18-Oct-2021
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Thank you for your review, and yes it was intentional to just kind of set up the beginning of the story. Thank you for your feedback and your review
Comment from blondie560
This is a cute story with a little girl point of view. True story here: my daughter does not enjoy Halloween and she just turned 40. She was frightened when she was two by costume characters in Disney World. Plus she tended to be sick around that time of the year because she had hay fever that we didn't realize until she was older and went through allergy testing.
Thanks for sharing your story!
reply by the author on 18-Oct-2021
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This is a cute story with a little girl point of view. True story here: my daughter does not enjoy Halloween and she just turned 40. She was frightened when she was two by costume characters in Disney World. Plus she tended to be sick around that time of the year because she had hay fever that we didn't realize until she was older and went through allergy testing.
Thanks for sharing your story!
Comment Written 17-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 18-Oct-2021
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Thank you so much for your review and sharing your story. Little children are very impressionable. My son at two years old was afraid of the people as well when we went to the mall to trick-or-treat.