The Sadness of Quiet
Remembering Zoe97 total reviews
Comment from kiwisteveh
A sad poem. Using such short lines creates an interesting effect.
I was a little buzzled by the pronoun 'they' in 'knowing they are gone.' Could it be more than one person that died? Looking at it again, I suspect 'they' refers to voice, closeness and essence from the previous stanza. I still think 'you' might be a stronger choice.
Steve
reply by the author on 16-Oct-2021
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A sad poem. Using such short lines creates an interesting effect.
I was a little buzzled by the pronoun 'they' in 'knowing they are gone.' Could it be more than one person that died? Looking at it again, I suspect 'they' refers to voice, closeness and essence from the previous stanza. I still think 'you' might be a stronger choice.
Steve
Comment Written 16-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 16-Oct-2021
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Steve, you are right on it does refer to Voice, closeness and essence. Thank you for the review.
Comment from Louise Bélanger Author
The sadness of quiet, just that express so much. The laughter we no longer hear, the voice we no longer hear, just too much quiet and the pain in our heart.
Your poem grabbed me. Beautifully written. I give it the highest rating.
(I am new to this site so I still need to learn how all works, I definitely wish you great success, this poem is excellent!!!)
reply by the author on 16-Oct-2021
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The sadness of quiet, just that express so much. The laughter we no longer hear, the voice we no longer hear, just too much quiet and the pain in our heart.
Your poem grabbed me. Beautifully written. I give it the highest rating.
(I am new to this site so I still need to learn how all works, I definitely wish you great success, this poem is excellent!!!)
Comment Written 16-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 16-Oct-2021
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Thank You very much.
Comment from Dorothy Farrell
Hello Terry, this is a sad one. You describe to perfection the feelings on the death of a loved one. It comes to us all - we try not to dwell on it. 'Only sadness and the quiet' - this is lovely - sadness at it's best. Good Luck. Regards Dorothy x
reply by the author on 16-Oct-2021
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Hello Terry, this is a sad one. You describe to perfection the feelings on the death of a loved one. It comes to us all - we try not to dwell on it. 'Only sadness and the quiet' - this is lovely - sadness at it's best. Good Luck. Regards Dorothy x
Comment Written 16-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 16-Oct-2021
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Thank You very much.
Comment from Patty Palmer
This is a very good entry for the contest. It's also a sad poem. The quiet is too loud to handle after a loved one's death and there is nothing that can calm it down until we grieve and thank the Lord for the time that we had together. Good luck with the contest.
Patty
reply by the author on 16-Oct-2021
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This is a very good entry for the contest. It's also a sad poem. The quiet is too loud to handle after a loved one's death and there is nothing that can calm it down until we grieve and thank the Lord for the time that we had together. Good luck with the contest.
Patty
Comment Written 16-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 16-Oct-2021
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Thank You very much.
Comment from karenina
This is too raw and too powerful to not be your truth. So sorry for your devastating loss. I see you are new to the site. Welcome! I hope you find writing is a wonderfully cathartic experience...
Karenina
reply by the author on 16-Oct-2021
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This is too raw and too powerful to not be your truth. So sorry for your devastating loss. I see you are new to the site. Welcome! I hope you find writing is a wonderfully cathartic experience...
Karenina
Comment Written 16-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 16-Oct-2021
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Thanks again, It is the truth.
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So sad. You're dong well to write about it. It helps, I think...in time.
Karenina
Comment from Eternal Muse
This is so incredibly sad and powerful. Losing a loved one is the biggest tragedy - and it takes years to heal. Some of these wounds never heal, and keep opening up from time to time.
Superb imagery and visuals.
Now,
No voice to hear
No closeness to feel
No essence to bear.
Knowing,
They are gone
Circles the day
Fills the night
With emptiness of might.
I loved it. Good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 16-Oct-2021
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This is so incredibly sad and powerful. Losing a loved one is the biggest tragedy - and it takes years to heal. Some of these wounds never heal, and keep opening up from time to time.
Superb imagery and visuals.
Now,
No voice to hear
No closeness to feel
No essence to bear.
Knowing,
They are gone
Circles the day
Fills the night
With emptiness of might.
I loved it. Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 15-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 16-Oct-2021
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Thank You very much.
Comment from Pearl Edwards
Before,
Love undervalued
Time overlooked. - I can relate to your words Terry. When my husband dies, after a long illness, thoughts kept coming at me, could I have done it different, better. An emotional poem about the loss of a life partner. Thoughts well expressed. Good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 16-Oct-2021
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Before,
Love undervalued
Time overlooked. - I can relate to your words Terry. When my husband dies, after a long illness, thoughts kept coming at me, could I have done it different, better. An emotional poem about the loss of a life partner. Thoughts well expressed. Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 15-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 16-Oct-2021
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Thank You very much.
Comment from Ritasher
It's absolutely devastating to miss someone you know you will never be able to see again. I think you give this emotion of grief a flavour with the way you express yourself: "Before,/Love undervalued/Time overlooked."
And quietness, the thing we usually value, suddenly becomes too heavy without the presence of another. Thank you for creating art out of difficult emotions!
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2021
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It's absolutely devastating to miss someone you know you will never be able to see again. I think you give this emotion of grief a flavour with the way you express yourself: "Before,/Love undervalued/Time overlooked."
And quietness, the thing we usually value, suddenly becomes too heavy without the presence of another. Thank you for creating art out of difficult emotions!
Comment Written 15-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2021
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Thank You very much.
Comment from Ric Myworld
Wow! I don't think I've ever ran across any of your work before this piece, but I'll be watching for your posts to read more. Thank for sharing your fine poem.
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2021
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Wow! I don't think I've ever ran across any of your work before this piece, but I'll be watching for your posts to read more. Thank for sharing your fine poem.
Comment Written 15-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2021
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thank You, I am new to the site
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Welcome to Fanstory, Terry! Glad to have you and I look forward to reading more of your work. Have a wonderful weekend!
Comment from Gypsy Blue Rose
The Sadness of Quiet
by Terry Broxson
Sad poem about a wife that dies unexpectedly. It's interesting with free form entry for the No Rules Poetry Contest. Good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 14-Oct-2021
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The Sadness of Quiet
by Terry Broxson
Sad poem about a wife that dies unexpectedly. It's interesting with free form entry for the No Rules Poetry Contest. Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 14-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 14-Oct-2021
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Thank You.
