Comment from knowledge

Excellent

Great job here. Good beginning and ending. I enjoyed reading it. I had to go back and see what to see what subject was because it was so realistic. I was a bit miffed when I found out it was fiction. I have had some ghostly experiences.

Your Friend, Danny

 Comment Written 18-Sep-2021

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reply by the author on 19-Sep-2021

Danny, thanks for the review. Yes I have had a couple of ghostly experiences myself. Keep well.

Comment from Katherine M. (k-11)

Excellent

This is an excellent entry for The Door Slammed writing prompt. It starts with the required sentence, and from there leads us into a world of suspense, and finally evidence of ghostly manifestations. Well done!

 Comment Written 18-Sep-2021

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reply by the author on 19-Sep-2021

Thanks for your kind review. I hope you are well and keeping safe in these uncertain times.

Comment from SHABAMO

Excellent

Great vision and descriptions. There are multiple ways to go with a door slamming story beginning but you went with one that began spooky and ended happy. Great work!

 Comment Written 18-Sep-2021

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reply by the author on 19-Sep-2021

Glad you enjoyed the story. Thanks for the review. Keep well.

Comment from Midi O'Rourke

Excellent

Good contest entry - a ghostly family story. I am also in the contest. It was a fun prompt. I hope you have time to read all the entries. It's interesting what people do with this sentence. Take care

 Comment Written 18-Sep-2021

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reply by the author on 19-Sep-2021

Thanks for taking the time to review my story. All the best to you and I will make sure I take time to read the other entries. This site is quite exciting. Keep well.

Comment from giraffmang

Excellent

Hi there,

Well this fits all the criteria for the competition prompt. A solid little tale with a satisfying ending.

I think you could have created more of an eerie atmosphere though given you haven't reached half the maximum word count. it could elevate the story considerably to elevate the atmosphericness (not a real word!) of the piece.

All the best
GMG

 Comment Written 18-Sep-2021

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reply by the author on 19-Sep-2021

Thanks for your review. I note your comment and it is certainly valid. You take care .

Comment from AliMom

Excellent

I like your story. At first, I thought it was going to be a typical ghost story. You lead me in that direction with the house's description and the statement from your wife about it possibly being haunted. It was really nice to see that the ghosts you were looking for were matters of the heart and only made the statement about being sad you couldn't feel what your wife felt all the more poignant. So nice that you found your treasure at the end. Good luck with the contest.

 Comment Written 18-Sep-2021

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reply by the author on 19-Sep-2021

Thanks for your kind review. I will make sure I read all the entries. You take care and all the best.

Comment from C. Gale Burnett

Excellent

Well done. Imagery was excellent. The narrator's heart, anxiousness, longing, thoughts and emotions were well expressed throughout the entire story. A timely subject. I enjoyed reading this story.

 Comment Written 18-Sep-2021

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reply by the author on 19-Sep-2021

Thank for taking time to review my story and contest entry. It is greatly appreciated. Take Care.

reply by C. Gale Burnett on 20-Sep-2021

My pleasure :)

Comment from Alcreator Litt Dear

Excellent

This The Door Slammed Fiction Contest Entry speaks confidently and interestingly experience of a ghostly entry in a compact order of expression; well said, well done; thanks for sharing this. ALCRREATOR

This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.

 Comment Written 18-Sep-2021

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reply by the author on 19-Sep-2021

Thanks for taking time to review my story. It is greatly appreciated. Take care.