Comment from dellsworthpoet

Excellent

An interesting poem. Although I don't have much truck with e.e. cummings being an Ogden Nash type of guy.

The poem reads well. Dividing it into three parts works. I'm still coming to terms with this type of poem. I could find it interesting.

Thanks for sharing. Bye the bye how would I go about adding to the bouquet, am considering it.

 Comment Written 28-Sep-2021

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reply by the author on 01-Oct-2021

Thanks for the review, dellsworth. I appreciate your comments about the poem being in three parts and that you found it interesting. You can add at the end of my poem but clicking the link. Make sure you establish whether you are writing poetry or prose. It depends on what was posted last. I hope you add to it.

reply by dellsworthpoet on 01-Oct-2021

Thank you for the information and you are welcome for the review.

reply by the author on 01-Oct-2021

You are quite welcome for the information and the review was appreciated.

Comment from Goodadvicechan

Excellent

I like the picture. It must be relaxed and calm to live in such a valley as you put it in your lovely poem: "howtown was a wonderful place
with views of farms and lovely isle.
up high they thrived with quiet grace
so wondrous beauty did beguile."

You did a good job to link the silver shovel with a beautiful valley.

Great job.

 Comment Written 28-Sep-2021

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reply by the author on 01-Oct-2021

Thanks for the review. I appreciate your comments about the image. It looks very peaceful to me, too. Thanks for sharing the lines you liked, along with the link to the silver shovel and the valley.

Comment from Val Crisson

Exceptional

Well, I am completely stunned by this piece, and truly it's above my head. I am hopeless at meter and rhyme and yet you are able to intertwine two pieces. You are so talented my friend, and your author's notes are almost as great as your writing. Love "How Town" - exceptional

 Comment Written 28-Sep-2021

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reply by the author on 01-Oct-2021

Thank you for the exceptional rating and review, Val. I really appreciate all of your comments and am glad you enjoyed this piece. Using rhymezone.com helps a lot with rhyme! Thank you for the compliment about my talent and the author's notes. It means a lot when someone enjoys what you write and shares thoughts about it.

Comment from kiwisteveh

Excellent

Hi, Pam. What an interesting poem - I have never heard of this form before. I note that Wikipedia says it is the last word of each line that should come from the original poem, whereas you have transferred them to the front.

I too like cummings' poem - it is so original and carefree of poetic conventions that it is startling to the reader.

I like the way you adapt the poem to describe a specific seaside town which brings cummings' imagined one up against reality.

Nice tribute.

Steve

 Comment Written 28-Sep-2021

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reply by the author on 01-Oct-2021

Thanks for the review, Steve. I appreciate your comments about the form. The original, the Golden Shovel, does have words at the end. I tried twice to make it work, and I didn't like the words at the end! I'm glad you liked cumming's poem and how I adapted it to a real town. I was very surprised by that. I wouldn't mind living there. We could have a small FS colony there!

Comment from robyn corum

Excellent

Pam,

How fun! I had never read this poem by e.e., so I was doubly enchanted. First by your poem and then - as I ran away and did a quick search and some investigating, by his. *smile* I appreciate thoroughly the new love I've just gained (for this wonderful poem I didn't know about) - plus - the lovely note of care and concern you've sent to our mutual friend - plus - this adorable and creative poem you yourself have created. It's a THREEFER! hahahaha

Thanks for the smile!

 Comment Written 28-Sep-2021

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reply by the author on 01-Oct-2021

Thanks for the review, Robyn. I appreciate your comments about e.e.'s poem. I have always liked it. I never knew there was an actual Howtown, though. I am glad you liked it, and my version, too, along with the thoughts for Karenina! Maybe that is a new form, the THREEFER!!! You can make up the rules, ha, ha!! It's easier to say than FOURFER!!!!

Comment from Gypsy Blue Rose

Excellent

A Silver Shovel Smile
by Pam (respa)

Lovely Story poem for Karenina. I'm sure she is going to love it.

The rhymes do not seem forced. Your poem flows well. It presents strong images.

 Comment Written 28-Sep-2021

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reply by the author on 01-Oct-2021

I appreciate your comments about the story poem for Karenina, the rhymes, and strong images. Karenina enjoyed it very much. e.e.'s poem was one of her favorites, too.

Comment from Sally Law

Excellent

Pretend this is a six! This is wonderfully creative and magical. I personally love
e. e. cummings. This sweet personalization for Karenina is touching to the heart. Sending you my best today as always, dear Pam,
Sal XOs...

 Comment Written 28-Sep-2021

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reply by the author on 01-Oct-2021

Thanks for the review, Sal. Okay, I will pretend, but the thoughts are what counts. I am glad you appreciated the creativity and the personalization, as well as e.e. cummings, too.

Comment from Seshadri_Sreenivasan

Excellent

I am not exposed to poetry and hence I cannot comment on the technicalities of this unique for. All I can say is that Silver Shovel is poetic and beautifully crafted.Karenina's would feel very proud that you have drawn inspiration from her book. Great contribution indeed.
Thanks for sharing!

 Comment Written 28-Sep-2021

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reply by the author on 28-Sep-2021

Thanks for the review, Seshadri. I appreciate your comments about the Silver Shovel being poetic and well crafted. What is important is what you get out of it. Karenina was very pleased with the poem. I am glad you enjoyed it.

Comment from Gloria ....

Excellent

And what a terrific pastoral here, Pam. I actually quite enjoyed your ingenuity in developing a new form -- the silver shovel. Now that is just smart poetic license, and I love it.

I hope Karenina enjoyed this as much as I did. :))

Gloria

 Comment Written 28-Sep-2021

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reply by the author on 28-Sep-2021

Thanks for the review, Gloria. I appreciate your comments about the poem and my ingenuity. That is because I tried the golden shovel twice, and both times it wasn't very good. I am glad you enjoyed it; Karenina was very pleased, too.

Comment from Anne Johnston

Excellent

What a great contribution to Karenina's book. I am glad she got us started on this Golden Shovel. You have certainly put a lot of work into this and did a great job on it.

 Comment Written 27-Sep-2021

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reply by the author on 28-Sep-2021

Thanks for the review, Anne. I appreciate your comments about this poem and how Karenina started us off with her Golden Shovel. It was a bit of work and I am glad you enjoyed it.

reply by Anne Johnston on 28-Sep-2021

You are welcome