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Secrets in the Wind

Viewing comments for Chapter 44 "Secrets in the Wind - Chap 44"
A story of loss, deceit, murder and crime

19 total reviews 
Comment from Carol Clark2
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Great chapter! Good way for Liz to learn about her family, through a letter to Jack. That answers many questions for the reader. As for Jon, I hope he turns around soon. Have a blessed week. Carol

 Comment Written 05-Sep-2021


reply by the author on 05-Sep-2021
    Thank you, Carol. I put a lot of emotion into this chapter and I am honored by you and so many others because they too felt the feelings behind the words. I appreciate your kindness and the stars.

    Smiles, Carol
reply by Carol Clark2 on 05-Sep-2021
    Yes, I enjoyed the emotional tugs.
Comment from royowen
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

What a lovely letter that was written, you sure do know how to upset a guy Carol. I've always been family oriented, it's the best gift that God can give us, we tend to not acknowledge thst in our youth, but when we are older we recognise how God puts us in families, He longs to be our Father, in our weakness He delights in being our strength. Beautifully written Carol, as always. Blessings Roy

 Comment Written 05-Sep-2021


reply by the author on 06-Sep-2021
    Oh, how awesome! You are the second guy to tell me they could feel the emotions I was trying to portray and it thrills me. I always know in my heart what I am feeling, but I worry whether my words bring it to the reader in the same fashion. Thank you!!!

    Smiles and hugs, Carol
reply by royowen on 06-Sep-2021
    Well done
Comment from Ric Myworld
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

I'm glad no one can see this big ol' tough man with tears streaming down his cheeks while reading a fictional story. Look stupid, feel stupid. But anyone who isn't touched by such a situation, has no heart. Thanks for sharing another fantastic chapter.

 Comment Written 05-Sep-2021


reply by the author on 06-Sep-2021
    Hurrah! If you tell me you felt the emotions I so was trying to portray then I am exuberant. I always know how I am feeling when I write the emotions, but I never really know if the reader feels the same thing from my words. You made my day!

    But then you do most times! Smiles and hugs, Carol
Comment from barbara.wilkey
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Oh My!!! you did a great job describing the emotion of this post. You nailed it.

Mastery used to get after me for not putting the action before the dialogue. He said the action should always come first, example: "Oh, what have I done?" Liz cried. He would say it should be written Liz cried. "Oh, what have I done?" Just a thought.

Jon hesitated and then opened his door. "Yes, we came here to pray with them, so let's do it. Maybe we can all find a little solace in prayer."


Allie returned to Liz's bedroom with a tray of pastries and two mugs of coffee. She found Liz where she had left her, looking calmer but staring across the vineyard. (You need an indicator of change of setting, something like ***** or whatever you want to use.)

She said every day I should thank the Lord for his blessings and know that good things would come to me (omit 'that')

 Comment Written 05-Sep-2021


reply by the author on 06-Sep-2021
    Oh Barbara you are so good to me. Your first sentence made my day! I was so worried I might not come across the way I wanted it to. Thank you!

    And you are right! Mastery told me the same. It's hard to remember all the lessons when I get so involved in the plot. I'll try to work on it some more. Thank you so much for the kindness, the review and the stars. It is awesome! Especially with these chapters that are so emotional.

    Smiles and hugs, Carol
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

I was holding my breath all through this part! I am so pleased Liz at last knows the truth. Now she must go to her mother and sister and bring pray that her neice is found safe and sound. What a chapter this was, Carol! I kept looking at the side of the screen to see how far down the chapter I was, willing it to be longer! The reuniun will be amazing, sad, and so needed for all their sakes. I can't wait to read it!!! Well done, my friend, another incredible chapter. Love and hugs. Sandra xxx

 Comment Written 05-Sep-2021


reply by the author on 06-Sep-2021
    Thank you, Sandra. I so wanted to make sure everyone felt all the emotions entwined in this chapter. Some were upset when I had Liz get angry and explode.... I hope I made it clear now why that happened. I appreciate your support and kindness all the time.

    Smiles and hugs, Carol
Comment from Judy Lawless
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Wow, another stunning and emotional chapter, Carol. You take us right into the room with Liz as she hears the news, and we feel her tears and despair. This time you led with the cliff hanger - what will happen when Cynthia and Jon show up at the cabin door? Well done.

 Comment Written 05-Sep-2021


reply by the author on 06-Sep-2021
    Not the explosion...but never fear...it will come! Just not in front of Cynthia! Hank and Garth to the rescue!

    Smiles and hugs, Carol
Comment from Seshadri_Sreenivasan
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

So, Hope knows nothing about Mary or Faith. Liz has become very emotional now. How these characters are going to react consequent of this information. Will their attitudes change. Then there is Jack and Jon to deal with. The story is gathering pace. Much enjoyed.

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 Comment Written 05-Sep-2021


reply by the author on 06-Sep-2021
    Sorry for the cut and paste but I am now currently 158 responses behind. I want to make the changes, thank everyone and start fresh. Wishing you a great day.

    Please forgive me for being so far behind on answering reviews, fixing suggestions, and thanking everyone for their kindness. Good thing a birthday only comes once a year. I posted to my family that I was cooking and for the first time in years, my house was over flowing for two days after two days of cooking. Now in three days, Matthew starts filming again and I must cook for them. This woman is tired. Thank you for all your support and kindness.

    Smiles, Carol
Comment from Lana Marie
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

This was such a good read, I really enjoyed the storyline. I haven't read any of the other chapters but this chapter, had a lot in it that almost could've been a standalone short story. Great dialogue between the characters and the description of the emotions that were being felt throughout the whole chapter.

 Comment Written 05-Sep-2021


reply by the author on 06-Sep-2021
    thank you Lana. I usually write my stories so a thought is completed in each chapter and then weave all the chapters together. i am thrilled you enjoyed this one and hope you will come back to read more.

    Smiles, Carol
Comment from BethShelby
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

I love the way you are putting this story together. Now Liz knows everything about her birth and why the Reverend Mother couldn't tell her goodbye. I'm dying to know what will happen when Jon sees Mary and whether they will recognize each other. It amazing how you've managed to connect all your characters.

 Comment Written 05-Sep-2021


reply by the author on 06-Sep-2021
    The next chapter Mary sees Jon but because Cynthia is there it won't be as explosive....but just wait. That creep isn't going to be let off the hook that easy.

    thanks for the awesome review and the stars.
    Smiles and hugs, Carol