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Secrets in the Wind

Viewing comments for Chapter 44 "Secrets in the Wind - Chap 44"
A story of loss, deceit, murder and crime

19 total reviews 
Comment from Raffaelina Lowcock
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

This is the chapter that tells all. The greediness of Cynthia and the evil she is willing to participate in, to reach her goal.
The revelation of Liz's true family pours forth from the letter the Reverend Mother wrote. And now the epiphany is portrayed in its full color. All the dots are connecting. Good story and well written.

Ralf

 Comment Written 08-Sep-2021


reply by the author on 09-Sep-2021
    I'll just say thank you for catching up with all of them. It takes a lot of time and I truly appreciate it. Hope you enjoy the story.
    Smiles, Carol


    Awesome and I thank you deeply for the six!!!
Comment from robyn corum
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Carol,

Your plotting always staggers me. I cannot begin to fathom what goes into beginning one of your books. Do you sit down and have this all in mind before you start? I KNOW you cannot just wing it, there are too many moving parts. Man. You are GOOD!

Enjoyed!

 Comment Written 08-Sep-2021


reply by the author on 10-Sep-2021
    I don't have all of it in mind but I do write an outline as I go along...ideas of how I think it should go...sometimes it changes and other times it flows exactly how I thought. Thank You!

    smiles and hugs, Carol
Comment from lyenochka
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

That was clever to use the letter from the Reverend Mother herself to explain all the secret relationships. If it came from anyone else, given Liz's previous reactions, it's not likely she would have believed them. But since she has this deep connection to the Reverend Mother, she believes it right away.

 Comment Written 08-Sep-2021


reply by the author on 10-Sep-2021
    As usual, I am far behind on sending out my thank you and appreciation for reading, enjoying, and commenting on the story.
    I truly appreciate it. Thank you so much.

    Smiles and hugs, Carol
Comment from chatterbox1
Good
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Okay. I'm not very good at this, but my intent is to help, okay?

Here goes: with only 2 people in a scene, using and saying a name so often isn't necessary. 'He,' 'she,' 'the distraught woman,' etc might be options after they are identified.
Careful of redundancies like 'she got out of the car and looked in the car windshield'
'morning substance'-- do you mean 'sustenance,' which is nourishment?

Now to the fun part...WoW! You have a lot going on. Interesting to see where this goes. Keep writing, Girl.



This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.

 Comment Written 07-Sep-2021


reply by the author on 12-Sep-2021
    Thank you for reading and commenting on this chapter of my story. I fully understand how you feel about using their names, but unfortunately on this site I get far too many readers who want it written that way so they can follow easier I guess. I appreciate your suggestions and your time.

    Smile, Carol
Comment from karenina
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Heart wrenching emotional chapter! I brought extra tissue with me just in case!
Perfect way to reveal to Liz the truth about her family-- of course she's overwhelmed, but oh the reunion soon to come! Jon knoes Annie is kidnapped but (at least for now) he seems to not be the one who instigated it. A sin of omission is still a sin. Can't like him.
I want Annie back! You sure do love to keep us hanging on! Somewhere in here you wrote Lilly's rather than Li!y's....(just thought to mention it.)

Excellent!

Karenina


 Comment Written 06-Sep-2021


reply by the author on 06-Sep-2021
    thanks for loving the chapter and for eagerly hoping for the coming attractions.

    I'll try to find that error and get it fixed. Thanks you! I actually might get to write about Mary and Jon if I get through all these messages and reviews. Getting closer though. Smiles and hugs...Carol Found and fixed!
reply by karenina on 06-Sep-2021
    Ah... Leave all these replies to reviews for later. We all know you're up to your neck in a hit novel! :)

    Karenina
Comment from Mary Kay Bonfante
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Finally, Liz learns the truth about her family, in a way that she can understand and accept -- although it's still very difficult and painful for her. It's actually very enlightening to learn about her very early childhood at the Convent, her close relationship with the Reverend Mother, and their very painful separation -- as much as nuns are taught to surrender their emotions to God, it had to be very difficult for her, as well. Even in the later years of her life in the religious order, she had effectively become a mother to Elizabeth Hope!

Errors and suggestions:

"Guess we'll have to walk. Jon."
-->
"Guess we'll have to walk, Jon."

We came this far so you could pray with her, but if you are afraid."
-->
We came this far so you could pray with her, but if you are afraid..."

Cynthia sighed and felt a cringe of pity for Jon.
-->
Cynthia sighed and felt a twinge of pity for Jon.

"I brought some morning substance." Allie laughed.
-->
"I brought some morning sustenance," Allie laughed.

much to my parents' and Lilly's chagrin."
-->
much to my parents' and Lily's chagrin."

More importantly, what led to her child being kidnapped, and why isn't she searching for her.
-->
More importantly, what led to her child being kidnapped, and why isn't she searching for her?

Jack had DNA Tests run.
-->
Jack had DNA tests run.

Faith Cranston-Newton - daughter of the Ted and Meredith Cranston
-->
Faith Cranston-Newton - adopted daughter of Ted and Meredith Cranston

***

Meanwhile, look at Jon, who actually feels concern about Annie, and whose conscience is really bothering him. I guess he didn't kill himself, that other night. Look at Cynthia, acting at the beck and call of Mason. And look at Mason, pulling their strings. Now we know who took Annie; we can only hope they didn't let her see or hear too much, so that they don't have to kill her.

 Comment Written 05-Sep-2021


reply by the author on 06-Sep-2021
    Sorry for the cut and paste but I am now currently 158 responses behind. I want to make the changes, thank everyone and start fresh. Wishing you a great day.

    Please forgive me for being so far behind on answering reviews, fixing suggestions, and thanking everyone for their kindness. Good thing a birthday only comes once a year. I posted to my family that I was cooking and for the first time in years, my house was over flowing for two days after two days of cooking. Now in three days, Matthew starts filming again and I must cook for them. This woman is tired. Thank you for all your support and kindness.

    Smiles, Carol
Comment from Carol Hillebrenner
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Good writing, good story line, and what a surprise for Liz. She seemed a little difficult when she thought there was no kidnapping, but learning her niece was the child kidnapped has brought out her softer side.

 Comment Written 05-Sep-2021


reply by the author on 06-Sep-2021
    Sorry for the cut and paste but I am now currently 158 responses behind. I want to make the changes, thank everyone and start fresh. Wishing you a great day.

    Please forgive me for being so far behind on answering reviews, fixing suggestions, and thanking everyone for their kindness. Good thing a birthday only comes once a year. I posted to my family that I was cooking and for the first time in years, my house was over flowing for two days after two days of cooking. Now in three days, Matthew starts filming again and I must cook for them. This woman is tired. Thank you for all your support and kindness.

    Smiles, Carol
Comment from Gert sherwood
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Begin Again
You definitely know how to make your readers sniff and make us cry. I found your story very emotional especially the letter that
Reverend Mother wrote
Here is one part that got to me as I was reading--
Tears streamed down Liz's face, splashing on the letter. She raised her eyes to meet Allie's and then Emmy's, too.

"She's my mother? And Faith is my sister?" Liz couldn't control her sobs. Allie's eyes glistened as she hugged her friend.
Gert

 Comment Written 05-Sep-2021


reply by the author on 06-Sep-2021
    Sorry for the cut and paste but I am now currently 158 responses behind. I want to make the changes, thank everyone and start fresh. Wishing you a great day.

    Please forgive me for being so far behind on answering reviews, fixing suggestions, and thanking everyone for their kindness. Good thing a birthday only comes once a year. I posted to my family that I was cooking and for the first time in years, my house was over flowing for two days after two days of cooking. Now in three days, Matthew starts filming again and I must cook for them. This woman is tired. Thank you for all your support and kindness.

    Smiles, Carol
reply by Gert sherwood on 06-Sep-2021
    Carol, with all you need to sounds very trying. I can understand how you feel. It shows how well you are known.
    Gert
Comment from Wendy G
Excellent
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What a chapter! Packed with emotion, and very moving! I am glad that Liz knows this part of the truth now, and will hopefully have a chance to reconcile with her mother and meet her sister. Cynthia is evil! Jon is so weak ... hope he will truly repent soon, and not just to get himself out of the mess he has gotten into! Loving it.
Wendy














i

 Comment Written 05-Sep-2021


reply by the author on 05-Sep-2021
    thanks Wendy... I spent the day with family and again today so I am in need of recuperation and catching up on all the reviews and messages. Thanks for reading and enjoying. have a great weekend.

    Smiles, Carol
reply by Wendy G on 05-Sep-2021
    You must live life in the fast lane! Lol.
    I am a bit behind too. Just read two chapters together.
    Wendy
Comment from Elizabeth Emerald
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Wham! Stunning development!

(Whatever happened to the poisoned nurse?)

"I brought some morning substance=>SUSTENANCE

[As=>WHEN I WAS] a baby and a young toddler, she was the one caring for me.

 Comment Written 05-Sep-2021


reply by the author on 05-Sep-2021
    Well blast my tired mind away. I even looked up the spelling to make sure and then didn't type it right anyways or auto correct corrected me again. LOL Yeah, I remembered the other day I had forgotten to tie up that loose end... in the rewrite I'll hope she's still hanging on for dear life till I get to her. LOL

    I am so far behind on everything...Ugh!

    Smiles, Carol