Football - A Novel
Viewing comments for Chapter 50 "Football Chapter 25 part 2"A mother faces life's struggles.
26 total reviews
Comment from Pam (respa)
-A good image and
chapter to go with it, barbara.
-You do a good job with
Katherine's emotions in the chapter.
-I imagine having boys of your
own, you were able to personalize
those feelings.
-Gabe felt terrible, but did what
he could to help, and knew
Katherine needed time.
-I'm glad you included the
background of Katherine's
experiences, even though
they had been hinted at; it
shows why this situation
was so difficult for her on
top of it being her son who is hurt.
-I like the ending section when Jordan
wakes up, and the first thing
he talks about is the play!
-It was good Gabe was there
to make the suggestion to
the doctor, too.
-Another very good chapter!
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2021
  |
-A good image and
chapter to go with it, barbara.
-You do a good job with
Katherine's emotions in the chapter.
-I imagine having boys of your
own, you were able to personalize
those feelings.
-Gabe felt terrible, but did what
he could to help, and knew
Katherine needed time.
-I'm glad you included the
background of Katherine's
experiences, even though
they had been hinted at; it
shows why this situation
was so difficult for her on
top of it being her son who is hurt.
-I like the ending section when Jordan
wakes up, and the first thing
he talks about is the play!
-It was good Gabe was there
to make the suggestion to
the doctor, too.
-Another very good chapter!
Comment Written 29-Aug-2021
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2021
-
My boys have been injured playing football. Thank you for the kind review.
-
I figured they might have been. You are welcome for the review.
Comment from robyn corum
Barb,
Oh, my stars, girl. What are you doing to me????? I mean, I know good writing when I see it and great plot structure - more stuff to keep these two apart. But wow!!!!
Good stuff!!! Bt NOW What!!??!?!!?
Notes:
1.) They remained like that until the doctor (came) from examining Jordan and offered his hand.
2.) While Katherine stood by the Jordan's door,
--> delete 'the'
Thanks!
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2021
|
Barb,
Oh, my stars, girl. What are you doing to me????? I mean, I know good writing when I see it and great plot structure - more stuff to keep these two apart. But wow!!!!
Good stuff!!! Bt NOW What!!??!?!!?
Notes:
1.) They remained like that until the doctor (came) from examining Jordan and offered his hand.
2.) While Katherine stood by the Jordan's door,
--> delete 'the'
Thanks!
Comment Written 29-Aug-2021
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2021
-
Thank you for the catches, both of those areas were areas I had basically rewritten.
Comment from Begin Again
What a tough spot, Katherine finds herself. Torn because of her father, mad at Gabriel, and discovering it was Jordan's idea. Now that's a basketful of butterflies if I ever read one. And he's so thoughtful and concerned about her over himself. I hope she doesn't blow it. There aren't too many jocks like him.
Smiles, Carol
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2021
|
What a tough spot, Katherine finds herself. Torn because of her father, mad at Gabriel, and discovering it was Jordan's idea. Now that's a basketful of butterflies if I ever read one. And he's so thoughtful and concerned about her over himself. I hope she doesn't blow it. There aren't too many jocks like him.
Smiles, Carol
Comment Written 29-Aug-2021
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2021
-
Very few jocks like him. He's had the other and didn't like it so changed. Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from amahra
Whew! I'm glad Jordan woke and will make a full recovery. I didn't notice it before, I guess because I came in the middle of the book, but Katherine brings a lot of baggage to her relationship with Gabriel--her father and her husband's treatment.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2021
|
Whew! I'm glad Jordan woke and will make a full recovery. I didn't notice it before, I guess because I came in the middle of the book, but Katherine brings a lot of baggage to her relationship with Gabriel--her father and her husband's treatment.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 29-Aug-2021
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2021
-
Yes, she does. Thank you for picking that up. I appreciate the kind review.
Comment from judiverse
What they won't risk for football To me it doesn't make sense. Excellent job of showing the emotion all around. I can hardly believe it's been just 28 days. So much can happen in that amount of time. There's a lot of blame. Jordan was set on playing, and Katherine gave her permission. Gabriel feels responsibility too. Katherine's in-laws are no where in the picture at this point, but I wonder if they'll try to take advantage of Jordan's injury. I'm glad it looks like he'll make a full recovery, but a lot of tension leading up to it. judi
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2021
 |
What they won't risk for football To me it doesn't make sense. Excellent job of showing the emotion all around. I can hardly believe it's been just 28 days. So much can happen in that amount of time. There's a lot of blame. Jordan was set on playing, and Katherine gave her permission. Gabriel feels responsibility too. Katherine's in-laws are no where in the picture at this point, but I wonder if they'll try to take advantage of Jordan's injury. I'm glad it looks like he'll make a full recovery, but a lot of tension leading up to it. judi
Comment Written 29-Aug-2021
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2021
-
There is a lot of tension and it's going to get worse. Thank you for the kind review.
-
You're welcome. As I wrote, I couldn't believe such a short amount of time has passed. There have been so many developments. It's like being on a roller coaster ride. Oh, I can't imagine what it'll be like if things get worse! judi
-
I know. I keep a calendar beside me so I can keep the dates straight. Also for the people who want them to jump into bed. LOL
Comment from Anne Johnston
Another great chapter. I enjoyed reading it, even though it was scary at times wondering if Jordan was going to wake up. I think that must be very hard for a parent to sit at a child's bedside not knowing what is wrong. this scene was well written.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2021
|
Another great chapter. I enjoyed reading it, even though it was scary at times wondering if Jordan was going to wake up. I think that must be very hard for a parent to sit at a child's bedside not knowing what is wrong. this scene was well written.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 29-Aug-2021
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2021
-
Thank you for the kind review. All four of my boys played football. Been there done that.
-
You are welcome
