On the Edge of Deception Pg 57
And the end draws near.....17 total reviews
Comment from Susan Newell
Now we're moving again. Good job with Nancy and Beth. The only thing I wondered about was Amanda and Nancy coming out of the same elevator. I wasn't sure where they were coming from. Was it a secure hotel? I'm also not sure that Nancy would have yet been in an orange jumpsuit since she hasn't been brought up on charges and is being held outside of jail. At this point she's still just a witness. That O'Shea is one slithery snake for sure. Off with his head! And I'm off to the next page!
out from under daddy's thumb. -- I think I'd cap Daddy since we know it's his daddy.
Begin Again." -- need opening quote -- This made me chuckle -- and wonder if O'Shea has a backup scheme ready to go.
reply by the author on 20-Jun-2021
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Now we're moving again. Good job with Nancy and Beth. The only thing I wondered about was Amanda and Nancy coming out of the same elevator. I wasn't sure where they were coming from. Was it a secure hotel? I'm also not sure that Nancy would have yet been in an orange jumpsuit since she hasn't been brought up on charges and is being held outside of jail. At this point she's still just a witness. That O'Shea is one slithery snake for sure. Off with his head! And I'm off to the next page!
out from under daddy's thumb. -- I think I'd cap Daddy since we know it's his daddy.
Begin Again." -- need opening quote -- This made me chuckle -- and wonder if O'Shea has a backup scheme ready to go.
Comment Written 20-Jun-2021
reply by the author on 20-Jun-2021
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Good morning, Susan... i hoped you would be one of the first to read the two chapters. Even though I love the story, would you believe I thought I might get up and discover I'd fallen flat on my face...got the whole thing wrong?
I have to go back and se how I worded it, but in my head I believed Nancy had accepted the deal... otherwise why would she give Garth all the information he wanted. Maybe it needs to be clearer. Therefore, she was a prisoner. that's something I will need to revist as I start over and polish. And yes.....I considered them both held in a secure hotel (seperately) so that the transfer could be done quickly.
Smiles, Carol
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I think that even when there's a plea deal, it has to go through the court. At least that's what I've seen on Law and Order. You might just want to slip in that "hotel" parking garage.
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you are probably right... and I will have to make those changes...That's why I have you on top of it all. LOL
Thanks...
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I can't wait to reread.
Comment from Raffaelina Lowcock
It's a Wrap! Sorry, Carol It really isn't over yet, but it is coming together nicely. There are a lot of roundups yet, I suspect, from what O'Shea is saying. Gripping!
Ralf
reply by the author on 20-Jun-2021
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It's a Wrap! Sorry, Carol It really isn't over yet, but it is coming together nicely. There are a lot of roundups yet, I suspect, from what O'Shea is saying. Gripping!
Ralf
Comment Written 20-Jun-2021
reply by the author on 20-Jun-2021
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Thanks, Ralf. You made me think of my son and how big his smile is when he yells, it's a wrap. I feel the same way I guess with this story coming to an end. Thanks so much. Smiles, Carol
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
Begin Again!! LOL, that was clever. But, it looks like your name is going to warn everyone else up the chain. That mustn't happen. I think you described me without my make-up!! I have to have my eyes on, at least. This was a great part, Carol, the whole deal is almost wrapped up, but I'm a bit worried that O'Shea has warned everone. I'm rushing off to read the final chapter now! Well done, my friend. :)) Sandra xxx
reply by the author on 20-Jun-2021
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Begin Again!! LOL, that was clever. But, it looks like your name is going to warn everyone else up the chain. That mustn't happen. I think you described me without my make-up!! I have to have my eyes on, at least. This was a great part, Carol, the whole deal is almost wrapped up, but I'm a bit worried that O'Shea has warned everone. I'm rushing off to read the final chapter now! Well done, my friend. :)) Sandra xxx
Comment Written 20-Jun-2021
reply by the author on 20-Jun-2021
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Good morning, Sandra... I guess I am like one of those carpenters who has to leave his signature somewhere behind the walls.
I hope there was a tiny glimmer of humanity there for Nancy at the end. I like my characters to show a bit of light within all their darkness.
Thanks, Carol
Comment from karenina
Love the password! (smile...)
And, here's a shocker...you handled that interaction between Beth and Nancy with such finesse even I had a bit of regret for the woman I've loved to despise!
Perfect touch!
Now!
O'Shea wants to bail... Peter's in a pickle....
So I know I'm promised another chapter!
Hurrah!
Another winner, Carol...
Karenina
reply by the author on 20-Jun-2021
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Love the password! (smile...)
And, here's a shocker...you handled that interaction between Beth and Nancy with such finesse even I had a bit of regret for the woman I've loved to despise!
Perfect touch!
Now!
O'Shea wants to bail... Peter's in a pickle....
So I know I'm promised another chapter!
Hurrah!
Another winner, Carol...
Karenina
Comment Written 20-Jun-2021
reply by the author on 20-Jun-2021
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Good morning, sweet Karenina....
I couldn't resist the password... It's like one of those carpenters who signs his name within the hidden walls of a house he's built. LOL
As for Nancy and Beth, I guess I needed to show a glimmer of humanity and hope hidden somewhere inside the woman. She got lost in her travels.
Thanks for all your kind words.... Smiles, Carol
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Yes! Even in the most misguided there is redemption... You conveyed that so genuinely! It touched my heart...
Karenina
Comment from Patty Palmer
Oh boy! Great news that Beth was found innocent and that Bert is going to adopt her. Amanda really helped save the day. So now we are getting ready for some more action. Great story, Carol!
xxoo Patty
reply by the author on 20-Jun-2021
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Oh boy! Great news that Beth was found innocent and that Bert is going to adopt her. Amanda really helped save the day. So now we are getting ready for some more action. Great story, Carol!
xxoo Patty
Comment Written 20-Jun-2021
reply by the author on 20-Jun-2021
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good morning, Patty. Yes, I had to add some happy moments for Beth after all the things I've put it through in the story. Now the last two chapters will be doom and gloom for the bad guys.
Smiles and hugs, Carol
Comment from lyenochka
Oh my goodness! What kind of "friend" was he to Nancy to then blow up her bar? If O'Shea gets away, how will they prove that he was behind all the drug dealings? Hope they can still catch him!
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reply by the author on 20-Jun-2021
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Oh my goodness! What kind of "friend" was he to Nancy to then blow up her bar? If O'Shea gets away, how will they prove that he was behind all the drug dealings? Hope they can still catch him!
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The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 20-Jun-2021
reply by the author on 20-Jun-2021
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O'Shea wasn't even a friend to himself...Evil corrupted him and greed and power were his only motives. Thanks, Helen.
Comment from Elizabeth Emerald
I see I read these out of sequence--no matter--this fills in the logistics of the transports and such.
sugg: octopus arms=>TENTACLES (esp. since there are more than 8 bad guys!)
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reply by the author on 20-Jun-2021
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I see I read these out of sequence--no matter--this fills in the logistics of the transports and such.
sugg: octopus arms=>TENTACLES (esp. since there are more than 8 bad guys!)
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 20-Jun-2021
reply by the author on 20-Jun-2021
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Liz...how could you, girlfriend...Well, I am glad you enjoyed it. Smiles, Carol
