Football - A Novel
Viewing comments for Chapter 39 "Football Chapter 19 part 3"A mother faces life's struggles.
31 total reviews
Comment from Rosemary Everson1
I enjoy reading your story from chapter to chapter. You do a great job with keeping us in suspense....if she has four boys she does a great job in keeping them discipline.
reply by the author on 21-Jun-2021
  |
I enjoy reading your story from chapter to chapter. You do a great job with keeping us in suspense....if she has four boys she does a great job in keeping them discipline.
Comment Written 20-Jun-2021
reply by the author on 21-Jun-2021
-
Thank you for the kind review. Yes, she has 4 boys.
Comment from Wendy G
Teenagers will always pick up on staff romances and want to know more! They are very quick- and also very discerning as to whether the relationship will be successful. The story and the main characters still continue to be interesting, but we sense they will come together even though she seems a bit too reluctant.
Well written. Looking forward to the next chapter.
reply by the author on 17-Jun-2021
|
Teenagers will always pick up on staff romances and want to know more! They are very quick- and also very discerning as to whether the relationship will be successful. The story and the main characters still continue to be interesting, but we sense they will come together even though she seems a bit too reluctant.
Well written. Looking forward to the next chapter.
Comment Written 17-Jun-2021
reply by the author on 17-Jun-2021
-
She is reluctant but is breaking. LOL Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from elchupakabra
Sandy asked, "Coach, is Coach Hudson your boyfriend?" (This was confusing to me, is Katherine also a coach? - I'd throw that in her bio)
As the team captains called the coin toss (technically, only the Away Captain calls the coin toss)
As the team captains met at midfield for the coin toss...
Going into half-time, the Bears were ahead with a score of zero-to-fourteen. / As a life long sports fan, this reads weird to me.
Going into the half, the Bears were up fourteen to zero.
Going into half-time, the Bears were up fourteen zilch/nada.
The final score was twelve-to-thirty-five. (Generally, the higher score goes first)
The final score was thirty-five to twelve.
Some small notes, mostly about the sports jargon/lingo - Otherwise great work here, thanks for sharing. Later daze.
reply by the author on 17-Jun-2021
|
Sandy asked, "Coach, is Coach Hudson your boyfriend?" (This was confusing to me, is Katherine also a coach? - I'd throw that in her bio)
As the team captains called the coin toss (technically, only the Away Captain calls the coin toss)
As the team captains met at midfield for the coin toss...
Going into half-time, the Bears were ahead with a score of zero-to-fourteen. / As a life long sports fan, this reads weird to me.
Going into the half, the Bears were up fourteen to zero.
Going into half-time, the Bears were up fourteen zilch/nada.
The final score was twelve-to-thirty-five. (Generally, the higher score goes first)
The final score was thirty-five to twelve.
Some small notes, mostly about the sports jargon/lingo - Otherwise great work here, thanks for sharing. Later daze.
Comment Written 17-Jun-2021
reply by the author on 17-Jun-2021
-
It has been stated since almost the beginning of the novel that Katherine is also a coach, but I will add it to the bio. Also I made the rest of the changes except for the last one. I have always noticed that the home score goes second. When did it change? Thank you for the help.
Comment from Dilettante junior
Great chapter. Well done Barbara. This piece of prose was fun to read, flowed well, had the 'friendship versus romance part' which I believe made it quite the piece. Would love to read more and see where this goes.
Bravo.
Cheers,
DJ
reply by the author on 17-Jun-2021
|
Great chapter. Well done Barbara. This piece of prose was fun to read, flowed well, had the 'friendship versus romance part' which I believe made it quite the piece. Would love to read more and see where this goes.
Bravo.
Cheers,
DJ
Comment Written 17-Jun-2021
reply by the author on 17-Jun-2021
-
Thank you for the encouragement.
Comment from Eunice Amero
I wasn't going to read this story for only one reason because I hate sports. Don't get offended because that's me not you because you are a lovely writer and it really wasn't much about that sport. I really liked it, Thanks for sharing. Good luck
reply by the author on 17-Jun-2021
|
I wasn't going to read this story for only one reason because I hate sports. Don't get offended because that's me not you because you are a lovely writer and it really wasn't much about that sport. I really liked it, Thanks for sharing. Good luck
Comment Written 16-Jun-2021
reply by the author on 17-Jun-2021
-
Sports plays a very little part in this novel. It's a fill. Thank you for dropping by.
-
I noticed that after I read it. It was very good I enjoyed it. You are so welcome
-
You are more than welcome. Take care
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
I thought I'd read this part, but couldn't remember it and found out I hadn't!
School girls are always three steps ahead when it comes to noticing what's happening with their teachers. LOL, you can't hide anything from them. I think something must happen soon or either Katherine or Gabe will have to leave the school. It's a silly rule that you can't date. Another excellent part, my friend, and now I'm waiting for the race! :)) Sandra xx
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2021
|
I thought I'd read this part, but couldn't remember it and found out I hadn't!
School girls are always three steps ahead when it comes to noticing what's happening with their teachers. LOL, you can't hide anything from them. I think something must happen soon or either Katherine or Gabe will have to leave the school. It's a silly rule that you can't date. Another excellent part, my friend, and now I'm waiting for the race! :)) Sandra xx
Comment Written 16-Jun-2021
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2021
-
Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from eliz100
This is another great installment. You kept the story flowing wonderfully. There is no room for improvement. The picture you chose matches the writing very well.
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2021
|
This is another great installment. You kept the story flowing wonderfully. There is no room for improvement. The picture you chose matches the writing very well.
Comment Written 15-Jun-2021
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2021
-
Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from tfawcus
Those teenage girls don't miss a thing, do they? LOL You have dialogue switching between a lot of characters in this chapter, but with occasional action tags and character differences, you make it fairly clear who is talking. Quite a juggling act! Looking forward to seeing how this relationship develops.
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2021
|
Those teenage girls don't miss a thing, do they? LOL You have dialogue switching between a lot of characters in this chapter, but with occasional action tags and character differences, you make it fairly clear who is talking. Quite a juggling act! Looking forward to seeing how this relationship develops.
Comment Written 14-Jun-2021
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2021
-
LOL Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from estory
I liked that scene where the girls ask Katherine about her relationship with Gabriel. I think it really articulates these problems that can come about when two teachers date in the same school, and their romance becomes a distraction to the students. The scene with Kenny and Rhonda I think might have used a confrontation between the father and Kenny, something to inject that tension a little more into the chapter, brought these boiling emotions of father and daughter and boyfriend to the surface. estory
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2021
|
I liked that scene where the girls ask Katherine about her relationship with Gabriel. I think it really articulates these problems that can come about when two teachers date in the same school, and their romance becomes a distraction to the students. The scene with Kenny and Rhonda I think might have used a confrontation between the father and Kenny, something to inject that tension a little more into the chapter, brought these boiling emotions of father and daughter and boyfriend to the surface. estory
Comment Written 14-Jun-2021
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2021
-
The father would've gotten into HUGE trouble if he did. LOL Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Ulla
Hi Barbara, this is another great chapter. They are dancing round the table, so to speak. I wonder when they'll admit they are becoming more than friends. Kids a so observant. I love the story. Now what? All best, Ulla:)))
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2021
 |
Hi Barbara, this is another great chapter. They are dancing round the table, so to speak. I wonder when they'll admit they are becoming more than friends. Kids a so observant. I love the story. Now what? All best, Ulla:)))
Comment Written 14-Jun-2021
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2021
-
Thank you for the kind review.