Betrayal
Viewing comments for Chapter 35 "Betrayal Chapter 35"In the title.
34 total reviews
Comment from DSchlosser
I think this chapter was a little off on the entry of the gardener being the potential murderer that I was expecting. I think part of it too was that Latifah had not reacted to the gardener's presence. I would have thought she'd know who he was or that they had met before.
I know it's explained in the story, but I would have expected her to at least question why he was on the grounds or something. It's still a good chapter; this one was just a little different from the previous chapters in how it flowed.
reply by the author on 20-Sep-2021
  |
I think this chapter was a little off on the entry of the gardener being the potential murderer that I was expecting. I think part of it too was that Latifah had not reacted to the gardener's presence. I would have thought she'd know who he was or that they had met before.
I know it's explained in the story, but I would have expected her to at least question why he was on the grounds or something. It's still a good chapter; this one was just a little different from the previous chapters in how it flowed.
Comment Written 20-Sep-2021
reply by the author on 20-Sep-2021
-
I'll take a look at this chapter again and see if I can add some appropriate reactions on Latifah's part. You're right, she would know him. Thanks for that, David. I really appreciate this input. Warm hugs my friend. :)) Sandra xx
Comment from Cindy Decker 2
Sandra, congratulations on the number 1 ranking for your wonderful story.
I liked the suspense and action you assigned at Jose's appearance. I like your characterization too.
Good luck in all your writing.
It's good to talk to you again.
Cindy
reply by the author on 12-Jun-2021
|
Sandra, congratulations on the number 1 ranking for your wonderful story.
I liked the suspense and action you assigned at Jose's appearance. I like your characterization too.
Good luck in all your writing.
It's good to talk to you again.
Cindy
Comment Written 12-Jun-2021
reply by the author on 12-Jun-2021
-
Thank you so much, Cindy! It's been such a surprise how well it's doing. I'm not complaining, though! LOL. It's lovely that you are enjoying it, too, my friend. It's good to talk to you again, as well. Have a lovely weekend! :)) Sandra xxx
-
You?re welcome, Sandra. : )
Comment from l.raven
Holy Cow Sandra, now that was exciting...
and poor Jose...got wounded...scared to death...and still didn't earn a place on the Characters list...he might want to complain to the top muse...
not sure what the guys can do...but Grant better come up with something soon...
one of your best chapters my amazing friend...exciting...and pulls your readers right in...
very well written...can't wait to see what they come up with...sending sooooo much love...from me to you...Linda xxoo
one day at a time...sigh xxoo
reply by the author on 11-Jun-2021
 |
Holy Cow Sandra, now that was exciting...
and poor Jose...got wounded...scared to death...and still didn't earn a place on the Characters list...he might want to complain to the top muse...
not sure what the guys can do...but Grant better come up with something soon...
one of your best chapters my amazing friend...exciting...and pulls your readers right in...
very well written...can't wait to see what they come up with...sending sooooo much love...from me to you...Linda xxoo
one day at a time...sigh xxoo
Comment Written 11-Jun-2021
reply by the author on 11-Jun-2021
-
LOL, I'll add his name now, lol. Dear Jose, what a position to be in, kill Tania or that creep Rapier will kill his family. Hmm. Something is bound to happen soon.
I'm so glad you enjoyed this part, and thank you so much for another sixer. I did get pulled up for my language, but I knew I would. Sometimes you just have to put words in that make the scene authentic. I couldn't see Grant saying, Oh dear me! ... Not at that point! Right, dear girl, you have read both parts and caught up. Thank you with all my heart, my dear friend. Sending more love and loads of hugs. Chat to you soon. :))) Sandra xxxx
-
ARE YOU KIDDING...people don't usually whip out a dictionary on how to express what they are going to say in situations like this...they just say it...
and first of all...different strokes for different folks...no...that would not be Grant...these are no play men...
they'll kill if needed...no he is not going to be...an Oh Dear Me, kind of guy...
you should not have changed it...this is your book...call it as YOU see it...
I have changed things when asked...and I know I misworded it...but not this one...
you changed Grants demeaner...these are tough men...and so is their language...who and what these men are...is what keeps your story going... their not your average guys...
well I'll be looking for the next chapter...
and will email soon...
your sooooooo always welcome...bunches of love sailing your way...and many hugs as well...will chat soon...smiling big back at you...xxoo
Comment from Iza Deleanu
Poor Tania her troubles are not over and not even a hurricane can stop Colin for getting revenge on Tania, but Grant is there to take care of business. Thank you for sharing and good luck with your writings.
reply by the author on 09-Jun-2021
|
Poor Tania her troubles are not over and not even a hurricane can stop Colin for getting revenge on Tania, but Grant is there to take care of business. Thank you for sharing and good luck with your writings.
Comment Written 09-Jun-2021
reply by the author on 09-Jun-2021
-
Hi, Iza, thank you so much for this lovely review, I'm so pleased you enjoyed this part. Warm hugs, my friend. :)) Sandra xx
Comment from muffinmama
Aha, I knew someone would show up but you surprised us with who the knife-bearer was. While reading the scene, I kept thinking, this is the Rapier?? He seemed so weak, not at all like an assassin, but then all became clear.
What is wrong with Grant? Has he not learned anything? "He would rectify that as soon as the opportunity was right." Right then was the right opportunity! Men can be so dense sometimes.
Really enjoyed this read. It moved quickly and created the right tension.
Cheers. Ryma
reply by the author on 08-Jun-2021
|
Aha, I knew someone would show up but you surprised us with who the knife-bearer was. While reading the scene, I kept thinking, this is the Rapier?? He seemed so weak, not at all like an assassin, but then all became clear.
What is wrong with Grant? Has he not learned anything? "He would rectify that as soon as the opportunity was right." Right then was the right opportunity! Men can be so dense sometimes.
Really enjoyed this read. It moved quickly and created the right tension.
Cheers. Ryma
Comment Written 08-Jun-2021
reply by the author on 08-Jun-2021
-
Lol, you know men, just like I do. Grant is a bit slow when it comes to declaring his love. You are right, he should have told her right then! Thank you so much for this really lovely review, Ryma, it gave me a chuckle. I'm delighted you enjoyed this part, thank you, my friend. :)) Sandra xx
Comment from amahra
Wow, this was nerve-shattering. Thank goodness Latifah and Peanut weren't hurt. And thank goodness for Grant's bravery. Just a couple of things I believe would keep the action which you write very well.
'Stay where you are! Get back!' Stretching his arm out, he raised the knife, waving it at her. [He didn't need to say anything, The threat was clear enough just through his actions.] ("He didn't need to, etc..." takes away from the action) I would delete this.
Then Grant stepped over the man's body in time to catch Tania as her legs went to mush. [The shock of nearly dying had just caught up with her. ] (After what Tanis went through, the reader knows why her legs went to mush.) I would delete this.
But this is just a suggestion to tighten the action. Great chapter.
reply by the author on 08-Jun-2021
|
Wow, this was nerve-shattering. Thank goodness Latifah and Peanut weren't hurt. And thank goodness for Grant's bravery. Just a couple of things I believe would keep the action which you write very well.
'Stay where you are! Get back!' Stretching his arm out, he raised the knife, waving it at her. [He didn't need to say anything, The threat was clear enough just through his actions.] ("He didn't need to, etc..." takes away from the action) I would delete this.
Then Grant stepped over the man's body in time to catch Tania as her legs went to mush. [The shock of nearly dying had just caught up with her. ] (After what Tanis went through, the reader knows why her legs went to mush.) I would delete this.
But this is just a suggestion to tighten the action. Great chapter.
Comment Written 08-Jun-2021
reply by the author on 08-Jun-2021
-
Thank you so much for your wonderful input, Amahra, and the lovely review. It's so nice of you to take the time to write your thoughts down, and excellent ones they are too. I've taken your advice on this as I do agree with you. Thanks, my friend. Warm hugs, Sandra xxx
-
Thank you for considering the suggestions. I really appreciate that.
Comment from Jannypan (Jan)
I knew that Grant loved Tania. It is apparent to all now, Sandra. You did a great job with this chapter. It is filled with intrigue in a scary way. Who would have thought to threaten the gardener--only the twisted mind of Anna and Colin. Tania seems very capable of being strong in the face of danger--then collapses after she is safe. Your lines read well, with great action and suspense Of course, someone on the 'inside' would be able to skip the security. I do hope that Jose's family is safe. Now for the plane trip back home--another avenue where danger lurks.
Thanks for sharing.
Respectfully, Jan
reply by the author on 08-Jun-2021
|
I knew that Grant loved Tania. It is apparent to all now, Sandra. You did a great job with this chapter. It is filled with intrigue in a scary way. Who would have thought to threaten the gardener--only the twisted mind of Anna and Colin. Tania seems very capable of being strong in the face of danger--then collapses after she is safe. Your lines read well, with great action and suspense Of course, someone on the 'inside' would be able to skip the security. I do hope that Jose's family is safe. Now for the plane trip back home--another avenue where danger lurks.
Thanks for sharing.
Respectfully, Jan
Comment Written 07-Jun-2021
reply by the author on 08-Jun-2021
-
Aw, thank you, Jan, what a lovely review. Yes, it seems like it's one awful thing after another. Grant can't wait to get back to find out who has been betraying them. Have a lovely day, my friend, warm hugs. Sandra xxxx
Comment from aryr
Another great continuation chapter, Sandra. You wrote this with the fear that Tania felt when she face Jose and feared for Latifah and little Peanut. I was so glad that Grant showed up just in time. Even though he had to sort things out regarding Jose, he brought all the bits and pieces together. Well done and very much enjoyed. Blessings, hugs and smiles.
reply by the author on 08-Jun-2021
|
Another great continuation chapter, Sandra. You wrote this with the fear that Tania felt when she face Jose and feared for Latifah and little Peanut. I was so glad that Grant showed up just in time. Even though he had to sort things out regarding Jose, he brought all the bits and pieces together. Well done and very much enjoyed. Blessings, hugs and smiles.
Comment Written 07-Jun-2021
reply by the author on 08-Jun-2021
-
Thank you so much for this lovely review, dear Alie. I'm so pleased you liked this part. These last two parts were fun to write so I'm even more pleased you liked them. Have a lovely day, my friend. Warm hugs. Sandra xx
-
You are so very welcome, Sandra. Blessings, hugs and smiles.
Comment from Rosemary Everson1
this story sure turned frightful suddenly. The baby was born and the gardener was on a path of unrighteousness. How could someone, who is employed by Grant, be on the other side of the fence suddenly?
reply by the author on 07-Jun-2021
|
this story sure turned frightful suddenly. The baby was born and the gardener was on a path of unrighteousness. How could someone, who is employed by Grant, be on the other side of the fence suddenly?
Comment Written 07-Jun-2021
reply by the author on 07-Jun-2021
-
Only because Rapier, the evil villian had his family hostage and has threatened to kill them if he doesn't kill Tania. As you see, he didn't want to, he's a simple gardener. Now Grant is seriously on the war-path! Thank you so much for reading this part, Rosemary, all will be sorted soon. Warm hugs. Sandra. xxx
Comment from alexisleech
Another fabulous chapter, Sandra. Not only was it full of action, but it contained a huge dollop of human emotion. Tanya is turning out to be a present day superwoman in more ways than one! The only thing I'm a bit confused about is how Jose sustained his injuries, bearing in mind, the bad guys were all too far away, or they would have gone after Tania themselves.
I can't wait to find out!
Alexis xxx
reply by the author on 07-Jun-2021
|
Another fabulous chapter, Sandra. Not only was it full of action, but it contained a huge dollop of human emotion. Tanya is turning out to be a present day superwoman in more ways than one! The only thing I'm a bit confused about is how Jose sustained his injuries, bearing in mind, the bad guys were all too far away, or they would have gone after Tania themselves.
I can't wait to find out!
Alexis xxx
Comment Written 07-Jun-2021
reply by the author on 07-Jun-2021
-
Thank you so much for this wonderful review and all those pretty stars. Yes, you will soon find out how Jose was so badly injured. Patience, dear lady!! Lol. Warm hugs and lots of love! :)) Sandra xxx