morning wake-up
Haiku (rose-tinted vista)3 total reviews
Comment from tempeste
Ciao poet, you have 2 votes is!
Cute pic !
Adults find worms gross and kids fool around with them , yet despite their tiny size and unappealing sight , these critters are very important to our ecosystem ...
they break down dead flora and bacteria and even dead animals ..recycle this matter which fertilised the soil ..they also loosen and mix the soil keeping it oxygenated and dulcis in fundo..they are food for many other creatures.
I like how you choose this unlikely critter to be part of your poem .. it does deserve to be mentioned.
Read off lately that the worm population is decreasing ..causing much concern. ( sigh)
reply by the author on 11-May-2021
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Ciao poet, you have 2 votes is!
Cute pic !
Adults find worms gross and kids fool around with them , yet despite their tiny size and unappealing sight , these critters are very important to our ecosystem ...
they break down dead flora and bacteria and even dead animals ..recycle this matter which fertilised the soil ..they also loosen and mix the soil keeping it oxygenated and dulcis in fundo..they are food for many other creatures.
I like how you choose this unlikely critter to be part of your poem .. it does deserve to be mentioned.
Read off lately that the worm population is decreasing ..causing much concern. ( sigh)
Comment Written 10-May-2021
reply by the author on 11-May-2021
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Thanks Tempeste for your contest vote. It helped me into the third spot.
Mark
Comment from Bonnie Seach
Correct format. The artwork is amusing yet descriptive of the subject and idea. The author's notes are informative and interesting. Enjoyable. Best wishes
reply by the author on 07-May-2021
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Correct format. The artwork is amusing yet descriptive of the subject and idea. The author's notes are informative and interesting. Enjoyable. Best wishes
Comment Written 07-May-2021
reply by the author on 07-May-2021
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Thanks for your generous support of this short style poem.
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I'm looking forward to more of your posts
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I often post, but not every day. I typically write in 17 syllables or less for my poems. Longer ones are not within my poetry bailiwick.
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Praiseworthy! I have decide it is time for me to start writing chapters for a book. I do rather enjoy short stories and poems mostly.
Comment from DentedSyke
I liked your haiku. I really did. You fulfilled the requirements of the form, and I think you sent a deeper message with the seventeen syllables that you used. I do, however, think that using "megadrile" was a mistake. Personification in the last line would have been nice, especially if you had tied it to the first two lines. Something like:
"And stretches her arms"
This is just an example, but you can see how the entire haiku is tied together in this manner. Still, a nice effort from someone who has obvious talent.
reply by the author on 07-May-2021
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I liked your haiku. I really did. You fulfilled the requirements of the form, and I think you sent a deeper message with the seventeen syllables that you used. I do, however, think that using "megadrile" was a mistake. Personification in the last line would have been nice, especially if you had tied it to the first two lines. Something like:
"And stretches her arms"
This is just an example, but you can see how the entire haiku is tied together in this manner. Still, a nice effort from someone who has obvious talent.
Comment Written 07-May-2021
reply by the author on 07-May-2021
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DS!
Your suggested edit does provide a different twist to my last line. Of course, my slinky cartoon earthworm is without arms (-; I will consider editing before the contest voting begins.
Thanks for your support for my typical poem format.
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Good luck!