Creative Collections
Viewing comments for Chapter 10 "Unblooming"na-po-wri-mo contest
8 total reviews
Comment from Sharon Davis
Your haiku portrays a vivid image of a tiny bud, thirsting for a fresh drink of water. The title suits the piece well. Nicely done! Thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 21-Apr-2021
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Your haiku portrays a vivid image of a tiny bud, thirsting for a fresh drink of water. The title suits the piece well. Nicely done! Thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 21-Apr-2021
reply by the author on 21-Apr-2021
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Dear Sharon, thank you for your comments and review. Dove
Comment from Janice Canerdy
You have made excellent use of your seventeen syllables in this lovely haiku about rain and growth in nature. I've always been amazed that those obscured buds and seeds manage to grow anyway.
reply by the author on 20-Apr-2021
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You have made excellent use of your seventeen syllables in this lovely haiku about rain and growth in nature. I've always been amazed that those obscured buds and seeds manage to grow anyway.
Comment Written 20-Apr-2021
reply by the author on 20-Apr-2021
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Dear Janice, thank you for your comments and review. Dove
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
Some goods fail to bloom, as you say they man not receive water or thee is not enough light, you brought the process to life here, much enjoyed, love Dolly x
reply by the author on 20-Apr-2021
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Some goods fail to bloom, as you say they man not receive water or thee is not enough light, you brought the process to life here, much enjoyed, love Dolly x
Comment Written 20-Apr-2021
reply by the author on 20-Apr-2021
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Dear Dolly,thank you for your comments and review. Love, Donna x
Comment from Jay Squires
The contrast between Massive and Small is quite effective. But is the bud within the bloom, or is it BEFORE the bloom, with rainfall being the deciding factor for its development. Good luck, Dovemarie, with the haiku contest.
reply by the author on 20-Apr-2021
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The contrast between Massive and Small is quite effective. But is the bud within the bloom, or is it BEFORE the bloom, with rainfall being the deciding factor for its development. Good luck, Dovemarie, with the haiku contest.
Comment Written 20-Apr-2021
reply by the author on 20-Apr-2021
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Dear Jay, thank you for your comments and review. and your good luck wishes. Dove
Comment from Gloria ....
Beautiful publishing here. I instantly am in the rich garden. And I think it's an effective idea to combine NaPo poems with site contests.
You've got your two concrete images grammatically interconnected, and syntactical break at the end with the reason why the bud isn't blooming because there is no rainfall.
My only suggestion is to consider changing the word massive to a particular flower.
That said, great job and I wish you much luck with the Contest Committee. :)
Gloria
reply by the author on 20-Apr-2021
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Beautiful publishing here. I instantly am in the rich garden. And I think it's an effective idea to combine NaPo poems with site contests.
You've got your two concrete images grammatically interconnected, and syntactical break at the end with the reason why the bud isn't blooming because there is no rainfall.
My only suggestion is to consider changing the word massive to a particular flower.
That said, great job and I wish you much luck with the Contest Committee. :)
Gloria
Comment Written 20-Apr-2021
reply by the author on 20-Apr-2021
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Dear Gloria, thank you for your comments, review. and good luck wishes. Dove
Comment from Jill McCauslin
Very nice haiku! It's well done. I like it a lot. I like the last line the best. I also like the artwork you chose to go with your poem. Good luck with the contest.
reply by the author on 20-Apr-2021
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Very nice haiku! It's well done. I like it a lot. I like the last line the best. I also like the artwork you chose to go with your poem. Good luck with the contest.
Comment Written 19-Apr-2021
reply by the author on 20-Apr-2021
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Dear Jill, thank you for your comments and review. and good luck wishes. Dove
Comment from robyn corum
Donna,
This is such a sweet poem and a lovely haiku. I like the idea of the bud hidden so softly inside the plant - but sadly, missing out on the water from heaven! Great job! I really enjoyed this!
reply by the author on 20-Apr-2021
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Donna,
This is such a sweet poem and a lovely haiku. I like the idea of the bud hidden so softly inside the plant - but sadly, missing out on the water from heaven! Great job! I really enjoyed this!
Comment Written 19-Apr-2021
reply by the author on 20-Apr-2021
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Dear robyn, thanks for your comments and review. When I was writing this poem, it reminded me of myself - hidden in a mass of people, trying to bud forth, yet not receiving any rainfall (i.e., encouragement) from anyone. Love, Donna
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Well, that's kind of sad. But I don't really think that's true, is it? Every time you post, you seem to get pretty good remarks and reviews, don't you?
Comment from Eternal Muse
Oh, how I wish I had a six left for this little gem. Alas, my larger is empty. The most beautiful haiku I read in a long time; and I just love "missing fresh rainfall satori.
Best of luck in the contest; this poem and artwork were delightful.
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2021
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Oh, how I wish I had a six left for this little gem. Alas, my larger is empty. The most beautiful haiku I read in a long time; and I just love "missing fresh rainfall satori.
Best of luck in the contest; this poem and artwork were delightful.
Comment Written 19-Apr-2021
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2021
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Dear Eternal Muse, thank you for your comments review good luck wishes and your virual "6." Dove
