Reviews from

Fortune Cookies

Viewing comments for Chapter 29 "Last Christmas"
A Romantic, Superhero-like, Geek Horror story.

6 total reviews 
Comment from Eunice Amero
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

This reminds me of my Christmas' Someone here is ignorantly not paying attention to the girls break up. The story is nice and I would love to been there. What a beautiful place. That's been my dream for ever. You have a wonderful story. Hope you win if I can understand this Fanstory like I should. Keep up the good work.

 Comment Written 05-May-2021


reply by the author on 05-May-2021
    Thank you again. It was an unexpected and nice gesture to had received your review. I hope you will return for more chapters. Thank you again!
Comment from lyenochka
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Oh no! Poor El. I guess the sense of loss that he experienced as a child, makes it hard to risk that kind of relationship, or even be aware of Jennifer's romantic interest in him.

Great job with this, wrapping the song's lyrics to memory, and to the current situation.

One suggestion:
It was the kind of smile from a child that could give the world hope to speak of. (I would remove "to speak of" and end at hope. Or:
It was the kind of smile from a child that could enable the world to speak of hope. )

 Comment Written 18-Apr-2021


reply by the author on 20-Apr-2021
    Thank you, Helen. I?m glad you found the relationship of the song with the main character. I wasn?t sure if it was captured clearly.

    I will revise that pet as well. I?m still learning how to not add so many extra words.

    Hope all is well. I?m still juggling a lot of projects and family and work. It?s always a pleasure and joy to receive your messages and your writings.

    God Bless and stay safe always.

    -Euell
Comment from Rdfrdmom2
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Cybertron1986:

I did not remember that George Michael of Wham did this song. I could
not even begin to list the number of singers who have covered that song over the years. Some of our stations literally play it to death in my area. Christmases with an alcoholic father are not all they are cracked up to be, for sure.

Rdfrdmom2

 Comment Written 17-Apr-2021


reply by the author on 20-Apr-2021
    Yes, George Michael and Andrew Ridgeley wrote the song when they were in the band, WHAM!

    The song debuted in Christmas 1984.

    It?s been through hundreds of variations and it does get played to death every Christmas since LOL.

    Thank you for your kind and thoughtful review. God Bless
Comment from Suzanna Ray
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Dear Cybertron, when you decide to post something, I think the reader must feel like they have been hit by a semi truck. So powerful are the images that you depict. that every reader finds Something that resonates in
his/her own experience.

 Comment Written 17-Apr-2021


reply by the author on 20-Apr-2021
    Thank you. It helps a lot to receive encouraging and supportive reviews. I appreciate that very much since I?m just an amateur writer. Again, thank you and God Bless.
Comment from Michael Ludwinder
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Nicely done. I thought you did a great job with this chapter. Especially the flashback. I thought that was a creative way for you to peer into the past. This was well written and an enjoayble read.

 Comment Written 17-Apr-2021


reply by the author on 20-Apr-2021
    Thank you for your encouraging and kind review to this chapter. I hope you will find time to read pst and future chapters. Thank you
Comment from Bluesatinbutterfly
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I will be reading the earlier chapters of this story as soon as possible as I find the storyline and the characters very interesting. The dialogue is also clear and natural, thank you.

 Comment Written 17-Apr-2021


reply by the author on 20-Apr-2021
    Thank you. I appreciate your encouraging review and time to read this chapter. I hope you will find time to read past chapters as well. God Bless.
reply by Bluesatinbutterfly on 20-Apr-2021
    I will certainly do that :)