Traffic
Viewing comments for Chapter 31 "Back of the Falls"With their call stalled, Liz & Linda begin walking
10 total reviews
Comment from Leann DS
that little one is something else, isn't she? Nice continuation from your other chapters. Well written with good imagery and detail, and nice descriptions. If I may, there is a possible spelling typo, but I'm not sure:
This was going to mess with their imaging things. Where the girls ascended, Tommy and his companions were descending. They viewed the openings and tunnels from different perspectives.
Should "imaging "be "imagining "?
Well done. Keep writing. Hugs.
reply by the author on 26-Mar-2021
  |
that little one is something else, isn't she? Nice continuation from your other chapters. Well written with good imagery and detail, and nice descriptions. If I may, there is a possible spelling typo, but I'm not sure:
This was going to mess with their imaging things. Where the girls ascended, Tommy and his companions were descending. They viewed the openings and tunnels from different perspectives.
Should "imaging "be "imagining "?
Well done. Keep writing. Hugs.
Comment Written 26-Mar-2021
reply by the author on 26-Mar-2021
-
Thank you for your involved review. As I think about the use of the words, image and imagine, I read that imagine involves all of the senses. So it would be much better here. Thank you.
Comment from Seshadri_Sreenivasan
I have read the earlier chapter. The story moves well into this chapter. I find the description of the falls and the adventures of the two young ladies interesting. Thanks for sharing!
reply by the author on 26-Mar-2021
|
I have read the earlier chapter. The story moves well into this chapter. I find the description of the falls and the adventures of the two young ladies interesting. Thanks for sharing!
Comment Written 26-Mar-2021
reply by the author on 26-Mar-2021
-
Thank you for your involved review. I am pleased to know you've been following this story.
Comment from KyColonel Randal
Thank you for sharing this chapter. This description of the falls and their adventure there reminds me of a Hardy Boys mystery. It is interesting and makes me want to read more chapters.
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2021
|
Thank you for sharing this chapter. This description of the falls and their adventure there reminds me of a Hardy Boys mystery. It is interesting and makes me want to read more chapters.
Comment Written 24-Mar-2021
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2021
-
Thank you for review with your comparison of my writing and my favorite mystery books along with Nancy Drew. This a back story continued from a few previous chapters 29 & 30 where Spring Blossom at 6 years old rescued Tommy & her brother. You are welcome to read these or any chapters in my portfolio. There is no need to review them. Just enjoy. Almost every chapter of this book is suspenseful. The 1st thirteen chapters are about Liz & Linda rescuing ten teens from a trafficking operation.
-
You're welcome!
Comment from samandlancelot
Liz,
I like how the young girl saved the day. I'm a bit confused here:
This little six-year-old pipsqueak was outshining all three of us." (in your author notes, Spring Blossom is a teen, but here she's six-years old. Is this backstory?)
This was going to mess with their imaging things (I don't understand this sentence.)
Patricia
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2021
|
Liz,
I like how the young girl saved the day. I'm a bit confused here:
This little six-year-old pipsqueak was outshining all three of us." (in your author notes, Spring Blossom is a teen, but here she's six-years old. Is this backstory?)
This was going to mess with their imaging things (I don't understand this sentence.)
Patricia
Comment Written 24-Mar-2021
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2021
-
Thank you for your involved review. Yes, this is a back story continued from a few previous chapters 29 & 30 where she rescued them. You are welcome to read these or any chapters in my portfolio. There is no need to review them. Just enjoy.
"This was going to mess with their imaging things" Everything was going to be backwards. Liz & Linda entered the cave at the other end with 10 teens they rescued from a trafficking operation. Spring Blossom at the age of about 16 led everyone through the cave because she's been going through it since she was 6. She was 6 the first time she, her brother & Tommy who were 16 at the time travel through. Tommy is telling about his harrowing experiences. The 1st thirteen chapters are about Liz & Linda rescuing ten teens from a trafficking operation. Spring Blossom was one of the girls. Feel free to read any of them.
Comment from aryr
What a great picture, when I looked at it I could actually hear the rush and roar of the falls. An amazing continuation chapter, Liz, you managed to pull it all together before they made it to Billings for the festival. Fantastic job.
reply by the author on 22-Mar-2021
|
What a great picture, when I looked at it I could actually hear the rush and roar of the falls. An amazing continuation chapter, Liz, you managed to pull it all together before they made it to Billings for the festival. Fantastic job.
Comment Written 22-Mar-2021
reply by the author on 22-Mar-2021
-
Thank you for your enthusiastic review. I'm glad it created the sensory experience I hoped for.
-
You are so very welcome, Liz, wonderful job.
Comment from padumachitta
hello
Sorry I've been away, I'm on a writing course and it is a bit full on!
You are a great story teller, please keep up with this. I think it has a place, for others to read, and to think.
reply by the author on 22-Mar-2021
|
hello
Sorry I've been away, I'm on a writing course and it is a bit full on!
You are a great story teller, please keep up with this. I think it has a place, for others to read, and to think.
Comment Written 22-Mar-2021
reply by the author on 22-Mar-2021
-
Thank you for taking the time in your busy schedule to review my chapter. I am honored. I hope your are gaining knowledge to share.
-
It?s a writing course by Natalie Goldberg, ... great, it?s my 3 course with her..
-
Wonderful. I am glad you are getting so much out of it.
Comment from lyenochka
I like how you had Spring Blossom be a key member of Tommy's journey in the cave and that explains how she was vital to the group that Liz and Linda were in. It's good that the two journeys could be compared this way.
reply by the author on 22-Mar-2021
|
I like how you had Spring Blossom be a key member of Tommy's journey in the cave and that explains how she was vital to the group that Liz and Linda were in. It's good that the two journeys could be compared this way.
Comment Written 22-Mar-2021
reply by the author on 22-Mar-2021
-
Thank you for your enthusiastic review. It is good to know the aspects that stand out for readers.
Comment from LeftHandedScribe
You have a very distinct voice. The setting is clear and you use your characters well to give a feel for the tone. I hope you continue with this story and build upon what you already have.
reply by the author on 21-Mar-2021
|
You have a very distinct voice. The setting is clear and you use your characters well to give a feel for the tone. I hope you continue with this story and build upon what you already have.
Comment Written 21-Mar-2021
reply by the author on 21-Mar-2021
-
Thank you for your encouraging review. I am winding down and it is more difficult to come up with ideas. Thank you.
Comment from Mabaker12
Excellent storytelling as always Liz even to someone who hasn't followed the trials and tribulations of the girls from the beginning of their adventure. The reference to their native American names is done with respect. Waiting for the next chapter. Sincerely Anne
reply by the author on 21-Mar-2021
|
Excellent storytelling as always Liz even to someone who hasn't followed the trials and tribulations of the girls from the beginning of their adventure. The reference to their native American names is done with respect. Waiting for the next chapter. Sincerely Anne
Comment Written 21-Mar-2021
reply by the author on 21-Mar-2021
-
Thank you for your supportive review. It is nice to know how it comes across. This is very reassuring. So good to have you back.
-
You're very welcome
Comment from Iza Deleanu
Wow, what you are describing is magical and a cave with a waterfall wall. I know how wonderful.it feels because I have behind a waterfall fortune it's like I have been in Paradise. I know this is not the purpose of this chapter but I like the idea.
reply by the author on 21-Mar-2021
|
Wow, what you are describing is magical and a cave with a waterfall wall. I know how wonderful.it feels because I have behind a waterfall fortune it's like I have been in Paradise. I know this is not the purpose of this chapter but I like the idea.
Comment Written 21-Mar-2021
reply by the author on 21-Mar-2021
-
Thank you for your involved review. Wow, you've been behind a waterfall? Or even that close to a waterfall. I did want to elicit wonder of a different sort about the falls. You have definitely enhanced my hopes. Thank you.
-
Yup, I have been in Cuba:) The view it's amazing:)
-
The energy must have been vibrant