Comment from Goodadvicechan

Excellent

I am sure children will love the behavior of the Pookies. They will love to see them running or lying down like log, not to mention seeing them being chased by the bees.

Great work. Thank you for sharing.
Happy writing.

 Comment Written 21-Mar-2021

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reply by the author on 21-Mar-2021

Thanks so very much.........All the best to you going forward.......

Comment from Leann DS

Excellent

This is quite adorable and creative. I think children will love hearing the story and imagining the race. I did! :-) Thank you for sharing. Well done. Hugs and blessings to you.

 Comment Written 21-Mar-2021

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reply by the author on 21-Mar-2021

Thanks so very much.....I have fun with these little nonsense verses......Godspeed ........

reply by Leann DS on 21-Mar-2021

reply by the author on 21-Mar-2021

Thanks so very much.....these are fun little skits....Godspeed and Best Wishes to you going forward......

Comment from Dolly'sPoems

Excellent

A fun poem about these little piglets and you made me smile here. I just have one suggestion for this line for you, for the sake of meter:

And one was uniquely fun

(this one, uniquely fun)

Much enjoyed,
Love Dolly x

 Comment Written 21-Mar-2021

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reply by the author on 21-Mar-2021

Thanks so much.........you are right .....some of my stuff is a little sticky.....needs polish and a syllable "spit shine".....Godspeed and Best Wishes going forward.....

Comment from Sharon Davis

Excellent

This poem is wonderfully fun, and a very effective use of animals to engage the young ones' interest. Love the visual picture the storyline creates. Great job!

 Comment Written 20-Mar-2021

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reply by the author on 21-Mar-2021

Thanks so very much.......Good Luck to you going forward......Godspeed.....

Comment from Rdfrdmom2

Excellent

It would seem that ole Nester may not have been the fastest pig in the litter, but no doubt he was the smartest. Making this deal with the Queen of the bumblebees, Athena, to ensure those piglets in his sty would always win the county races. Good luck in the contest. By the way, this would make a really cute child's picture book.

Rdfrdmom2

 Comment Written 20-Mar-2021

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reply by the author on 20-Mar-2021

Thanks so very much....these are fun little writes.......Godspeed and Best Wishes going forward

Comment from Susan Larson

Excellent

What an absolutely surprising and delightful ending. It would be interesting to add The Flight if the Bumblebee " to the oral reading of this poem. Kids would have fun with that. Good luck in the contest.

 Comment Written 20-Mar-2021

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reply by the author on 20-Mar-2021

Thanks so much.....Great idea......Godspeed and Best Wishes going forward....

Comment from Allieas

Excellent

This was an enjoyable, fast-paced poem that kept my attention from start to finish - thank you for sharing it and good luck with the contest!!

One note - I think that it's categorized as a story for some reason rather than as poetry on the site - not sure if that was intentional or not but it should be an easy fix if not!!

Thanks again, best of luck and happy writing!

 Comment Written 20-Mar-2021

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reply by the author on 20-Mar-2021

Thanks so much......I'm starting out with these little slap dash entries just to see if they fly a bit......Godspeed and Best Wishes to you going forward....

Comment from Elizabeth Emerald

Excellent

Jaunty and catchy--delightful whimsy, sure to please the kids. I can see this chanted to a sing-songy jingle. Clever plot line--priceless theme song tops it off!

 Comment Written 20-Mar-2021

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reply by the author on 20-Mar-2021

Thanks so very much.....I really enjoy these little doo-dads....fun for the neighbor kids.......Godspeed and Best Wishes going forward.....

Comment from nomi338

Excellent

What a delightful little rhyming story. This story is ideal for entertaining a youngster and a parent as well. No questionable language or suggestive situations that needed to be explained. Just pure funny fun loving fun.

 Comment Written 19-Mar-2021

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reply by the author on 20-Mar-2021

Dear Sir......Thanks so very much.....these are fun to put together........Godspeed and Best Wiahes to you going forward......

Comment from Judy Lawless

Excellent

This is a wonderful children's poem. I can imagine reading to a grandchild and hearing their squeals of delight at Nester making a deal with Queen Bee. Love the prerace tune! Good luck in the contest.

 Comment Written 19-Mar-2021

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reply by the author on 19-Mar-2021

Thanks so very much.....I have several of these and am looking for an illustrator...I am really in the fun stage of this, but have enjoyed these contests.....Godspeed and Best to you always.......