Angelo's Answer
with a little help7 total reviews
Comment from Liz O'Neill
This did definitely observe the rules for this contest. I like how you led the reader to picture an entirely different scenario than was actually going on. Very clever.
reply by the author on 30-Apr-2021
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This did definitely observe the rules for this contest. I like how you led the reader to picture an entirely different scenario than was actually going on. Very clever.
Comment Written 30-Apr-2021
reply by the author on 30-Apr-2021
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thanks, Liz. had forgotten this one - had to go back and check. :)
Comment from country ranch writer
This is cute glad he got put in his place though by his aunt hehe he must have been a hang some brute to use sugar cubes to swesteb pan the pot trying to snag a gal.
reply by the author on 01-Mar-2021
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This is cute glad he got put in his place though by his aunt hehe he must have been a hang some brute to use sugar cubes to swesteb pan the pot trying to snag a gal.
Comment Written 28-Feb-2021
reply by the author on 01-Mar-2021
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thank you so much for the 6 and for your comments. much appreciated!
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🍔🍟🧋
Comment from Jay Squires
Well, either Angelo is an ant, or he's got some deep psychological problems that need attention.
With the entire story pivoting on the fact that Amy Sue was an ant (and assuming his own ant-ship), I suggest you plant subtle clues in the earlier paragraphs. Simply "hurried up his hill" and of course "Amy Sue ant" come too late and the reader feels cheated.
One grammatical concern I found:
the verb here should be "was" instead of "were" since it agrees with "stash," not "cubes."
Good luck with the contest.
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2021
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Well, either Angelo is an ant, or he's got some deep psychological problems that need attention.
With the entire story pivoting on the fact that Amy Sue was an ant (and assuming his own ant-ship), I suggest you plant subtle clues in the earlier paragraphs. Simply "hurried up his hill" and of course "Amy Sue ant" come too late and the reader feels cheated.
One grammatical concern I found:
the verb here should be "was" instead of "were" since it agrees with "stash," not "cubes."
Good luck with the contest.
Comment Written 27-Feb-2021
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2021
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well, jay, it's supposed to have a surprise ending. The reader is supposed to say, "Well, I'll be dern, an ant. what do yo know! :)
not cheated - a little humor, which we sure as hell could use today.
But thanks for the catch of was/were. This was a spur of the moment write.
Comment from Melodie Michelle
A good story but the ending was ?.
I loved the imagery and the characters interact harmoniously together!
Thank you for sharing and good luck with the contest!
God bless you and your family;-)
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2021
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A good story but the ending was ?.
I loved the imagery and the characters interact harmoniously together!
Thank you for sharing and good luck with the contest!
God bless you and your family;-)
Comment Written 26-Feb-2021
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2021
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so you were not surprised? sorry to disappoint.
thanks for good wishes. apparently I will need them. :)
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The story was good and characters were awesome, I just wasn't sure about the ending;-(
Comment from Sarah Jolicoeur
Love the concept of a sugar cube with a note- very cute! The back story was good and helped paint a picture of a young Romeo. I would have liked to know a little more background about his fondness for Amy Sue but overall I enjoyed this piece.
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2021
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Love the concept of a sugar cube with a note- very cute! The back story was good and helped paint a picture of a young Romeo. I would have liked to know a little more background about his fondness for Amy Sue but overall I enjoyed this piece.
Comment Written 26-Feb-2021
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2021
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yes, I guess the "courtship" was rather brief. :) Afraid the author was tired. Came up with the idea last night after a busy day.
was just aiming for surprise ending. thanks for reading and nice comments.
Comment from Victoria Gatto
The way the significance of the sugar cube was tied in at the end was sweet, no pun intended. I liked that the fact that he realizes that if he wouldn't cheaply flirt with a woman he values, then it must not be good to do it at all.
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2021
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The way the significance of the sugar cube was tied in at the end was sweet, no pun intended. I liked that the fact that he realizes that if he wouldn't cheaply flirt with a woman he values, then it must not be good to do it at all.
Comment Written 26-Feb-2021
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2021
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thanks for reading and for your comments. was hoping from readers a "well, what do you know, an ant" kind of response. I'm not being disparaging of your response - I appreciate your kind words. I was just trying for a quick, short story with a surprise ending.
Your picture is quite thought provoking.
Comment from equestrik
i did not guess. This was a fun story with an interesting and fun ending.The development of the story was creative. i enjoyed it and the picture was also well chosen.
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2021
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i did not guess. This was a fun story with an interesting and fun ending.The development of the story was creative. i enjoyed it and the picture was also well chosen.
Comment Written 26-Feb-2021
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2021
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Well, thank you! I appreciate your positive review!!
