Comment from Erika Seshadri

Excellent

Oh, wow... What vivid imagery for so few words. This is a great entry for the Sijo Poetry contest. And most people think warmth when imagining beaches, but this took me straight up to one of the New England beaches in the Fall. Windy, cold... Well done.

 Comment Written 13-Feb-2021

---

reply by the author on 14-Feb-2021

Thanks so much for your read and your encouraging comments.

Comment from Mary Vigasin

Excellent

Beautiful and poignant poem. One often reads poems that associates the beach with love and enjoyment. Here you have the beach in the cold of winter and a love gone cold.
Very well done.
Good luck in the contest.
Regards,
Mary

 Comment Written 13-Feb-2021

---

reply by the author on 14-Feb-2021

Thanks so much for your read and your encouraging comments.

Comment from donette1914

Excellent

very nice of soft sand to hard and cold
your brought this to life with well chosen words with the story line
very believable
thank you for sharing it was a pleasure
I hope for the best in the contest

 Comment Written 13-Feb-2021

---

reply by the author on 14-Feb-2021

Thanks so much for your read and your encouraging comments.

Comment from Pam (respa)

Excellent

-Nice artwork.
-You wrote a very good
poem for the contest.
-The syllable count is
good, along with the
topic and imagery.
-You set a scene and a mood.
-The opening verses show the
cold and icy shore because she
is not with you, as before when
you were here.
-You also have the counter theme,
and a good closing.
-A very good entry; good luck.

 Comment Written 12-Feb-2021

---

reply by the author on 13-Feb-2021

Thank you for your help.

reply by Pam (respa) on 13-Feb-2021

You are welcome.

reply by the author on 13-Feb-2021

Changed to:
lost I walk
the ice laced shore
where our loving
footsteps did run

hand in hand
holding so tight
we raced along
wet summer sand

now the sand
very cold and hard
like my crackled
icy heart

reply by Pam (respa) on 13-Feb-2021

Good job! It meets the requirements.

Comment from A Little Bird

Excellent

Congratulations on this melancholy piece. "Better to have loved and have lost, then never to have loved at all." Thanks for introducing me to the Sijo poetry format. Good luck with the competition!

 Comment Written 12-Feb-2021

---

reply by the author on 12-Feb-2021

Thanks much for your read and comments.

Comment from Iza Deleanu

Excellent

I like your first line it offers a message of love and longing:"

Alone I walk the ice laced shore where once our loving footprints ran" Thank you for sharing and good luck with the contest.

 Comment Written 12-Feb-2021

---

reply by the author on 12-Feb-2021

Thanks much for your read and encouraging comment.