Excursion
A young couple take a bike trip19 total reviews
Comment from David Sumich
This will be the one I lose to. ;-)
Excellent imagery, and wisdom in these words. You put us with the two innocent youths and take us on the journey right there with them, realizing at the end, they could be us. Good luck!
reply by the author on 26-Jan-2021
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This will be the one I lose to. ;-)
Excellent imagery, and wisdom in these words. You put us with the two innocent youths and take us on the journey right there with them, realizing at the end, they could be us. Good luck!
Comment Written 26-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 26-Jan-2021
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I am delighted I could put you there on the bike with these two kids. Thank you so much for this marvelous review and all those bright stars.
Comment from Dorothy Farrell
Hello anon, this is such a lovely, nostalgic poem, full of lovely descriptive phrases about the countryside. A lovely final stanza, so very sad but true -
Long flown those breathless days of youth,
that joie-de-vivre and innocence.
Such freedom we shan't know again--
a painful, sad, unpleasant truth... You'll have me in tears reading this LOL!
One little point - about the daffodil line 'We FILLED my basket with a FEW.'
Not quite convincing - but not worth worrying about in an otherwise superb poem. Good Luck - warm regards Dorothy xx
reply by the author on 26-Jan-2021
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Hello anon, this is such a lovely, nostalgic poem, full of lovely descriptive phrases about the countryside. A lovely final stanza, so very sad but true -
Long flown those breathless days of youth,
that joie-de-vivre and innocence.
Such freedom we shan't know again--
a painful, sad, unpleasant truth... You'll have me in tears reading this LOL!
One little point - about the daffodil line 'We FILLED my basket with a FEW.'
Not quite convincing - but not worth worrying about in an otherwise superb poem. Good Luck - warm regards Dorothy xx
Comment Written 26-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 26-Jan-2021
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Thank you so much for this marvelous review of my poem, Dorothy.
Comment from Susan Newell
I'm assuming you wrote the poem based on the artwork. You saw the story in the picture And told it well, adding a bittersweet ending familiar to anyone with a heart and memory. Keep up the good work.
reply by the author on 26-Jan-2021
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I'm assuming you wrote the poem based on the artwork. You saw the story in the picture And told it well, adding a bittersweet ending familiar to anyone with a heart and memory. Keep up the good work.
Comment Written 26-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 26-Jan-2021
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Indeed the artwork inspired the poem. Many thanks, Susan, for your kind praise.
Comment from nancyjam
Lovely imagery through this lovely poem. I enjoyed the conversational
tone as you recall the road trip. I assume it was inspired by the picture,
and you really did bring it to life with your words.
Good luck in the contest.
Nancy
reply by the author on 25-Jan-2021
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Lovely imagery through this lovely poem. I enjoyed the conversational
tone as you recall the road trip. I assume it was inspired by the picture,
and you really did bring it to life with your words.
Good luck in the contest.
Nancy
Comment Written 25-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 25-Jan-2021
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Hello, Nancy. Yes, the picture inspired the poem. I am delighted you enjoyed the tale of the bike hike.
Comment from E. Denison
This was a charming read. I think it will be a fun entry for the contest, and I can see a lot of readers enjoying the imagery and storytelling of a bike ride. Good job - best wishes in the contest.
reply by the author on 25-Jan-2021
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This was a charming read. I think it will be a fun entry for the contest, and I can see a lot of readers enjoying the imagery and storytelling of a bike ride. Good job - best wishes in the contest.
Comment Written 24-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 25-Jan-2021
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I am delighted you enjoyed my bike hike tale. Many thanks for reviewing.
Comment from Julie Sandy
A great poem that takes the reader on the trip also, it really captures the imagination and makes you feel like you are there also.
Lovely rhyme and flow
Thank you for sharing
reply by the author on 24-Jan-2021
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A great poem that takes the reader on the trip also, it really captures the imagination and makes you feel like you are there also.
Lovely rhyme and flow
Thank you for sharing
Comment Written 24-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 24-Jan-2021
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I am delighted I could put you there with Petey and his girl on their bike ride. Many thanks for sharing, Julie.
Comment from Susan Louise Gabriel
What a great entry for this contest! I especially enjoyed your artwork, and the poem that seems to have been written to describe it:
Side-saddled just behind my seat,
you laughed and urged my dog to run.
Thank you for sharing!
Susan
reply by the author on 24-Jan-2021
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What a great entry for this contest! I especially enjoyed your artwork, and the poem that seems to have been written to describe it:
Side-saddled just behind my seat,
you laughed and urged my dog to run.
Thank you for sharing!
Susan
Comment Written 24-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 24-Jan-2021
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You are correct, Susan. The artwork inspired the poem. I am delighted you enjoyed both. Many thanks for your kind praise.
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
A snippet of young carefree life here with some well chosen words and metaphors, I reckon this could be a winner for the contest, much enjoyed, love Dolly x
reply by the author on 24-Jan-2021
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A snippet of young carefree life here with some well chosen words and metaphors, I reckon this could be a winner for the contest, much enjoyed, love Dolly x
Comment Written 24-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 24-Jan-2021
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Thank you for sharing my poem, Dolly. Indeed, life was so much more carefree when we were young. I am truly delighted you enjoyed my words and metaphors.
Comment from lyenochka
Thank you for taking us time traveling to a time/place of innocence and joy while doing the simple things of riding a bike, enjoying nature, and being happy. Best wishes in the contest!
reply by the author on 24-Jan-2021
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Thank you for taking us time traveling to a time/place of innocence and joy while doing the simple things of riding a bike, enjoying nature, and being happy. Best wishes in the contest!
Comment Written 24-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 24-Jan-2021
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Indeed YOUTH was a time of innocence and joy. I am delighted you shared my poem.
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
A very well-written poem about the kind of road trips we made in our youth was much different than we do today. It took more effort to get wherever we want but it was great fun.
reply by the author on 24-Jan-2021
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A very well-written poem about the kind of road trips we made in our youth was much different than we do today. It took more effort to get wherever we want but it was great fun.
Comment Written 23-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 24-Jan-2021
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Thank you very much for sharing and reviewing my poem, Sandra. I appreciate your kind praise.
