Traffic
Viewing comments for Chapter 27 "Healing Dreams"With their call stalled, Liz & Linda begin walking
9 total reviews
Comment from Goodadvicechan
I like all the characters and how the author describes their behavior and interactions. Well done.
I especially like this part: "Tommy woke to find his bleeding hands grasping iron bars. He had no idea where he was, no idea why his hands were streaked with blood." This gives readers a chill feeling and want to find out more.
Good writing craft.
reply by the author on 17-Jan-2021
  |
I like all the characters and how the author describes their behavior and interactions. Well done.
I especially like this part: "Tommy woke to find his bleeding hands grasping iron bars. He had no idea where he was, no idea why his hands were streaked with blood." This gives readers a chill feeling and want to find out more.
Good writing craft.
Comment Written 16-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 17-Jan-2021
-
Thank you for your enthusiastic review. It's good to know how it comes across.
-
It is always a pleasure to read good stories. Your writing skills are worth me to learn.
Thank you for sharing.
Comment from aryr
What an interesting chapter Liz, it was a bit scrambled when I read it the first time but a second time made it make more sense. I really enjoyed that Tommy knew about the black drink and was able to assure them. It tied things together, well done.
reply by the author on 17-Jan-2021
|
What an interesting chapter Liz, it was a bit scrambled when I read it the first time but a second time made it make more sense. I really enjoyed that Tommy knew about the black drink and was able to assure them. It tied things together, well done.
Comment Written 16-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 17-Jan-2021
-
Thank you for your enthusiastic review. It's good to know how it comes across. Is there anything I might do to make it clearer? Was it about the dream that happened in Chapter 17 where they both had Black Drink dreams, Linda with angels & Liz going to the underworld and being consumed by a murder of crows?
-
Oh, I don't think it was you Liz, I had to read it on my phone, my computer was problematic for almost a week. You are so welcome.
-
I did add in the author's notes that there is reference to happening in chapter 3 and 17.
-
Great
Comment from kmoss
This is a good addition to the story. Either I'm confused or the characters were mixed up, in the beginning Liz asked if there was any black drink in their meal, then her dream is described. Later in the story, it says: Linda woke to find herself covered in the same soft lightweight pure white feathers as before during her Black Drink dream
reply by the author on 17-Jan-2021
 |
This is a good addition to the story. Either I'm confused or the characters were mixed up, in the beginning Liz asked if there was any black drink in their meal, then her dream is described. Later in the story, it says: Linda woke to find herself covered in the same soft lightweight pure white feathers as before during her Black Drink dream
Comment Written 16-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 17-Jan-2021
-
Thank you for your review. In chapter 17 they each had a black drink dream. Linda had angels, Liz went to the underworld and had a murder of crows consume her bones and all. Check it out.
Comment from greyson ernst
this is a really really impressive poem nice job and that picture is beautiful nice job and as always keep writing and stay safe'
sincerely Greyson Ernst
reply by the author on 14-Jan-2021
|
this is a really really impressive poem nice job and that picture is beautiful nice job and as always keep writing and stay safe'
sincerely Greyson Ernst
Comment Written 14-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 14-Jan-2021
-
Thank you for your supportive review. I'm glad you liked it.
Comment from AnnieDawn
Just coming into a chapter is difficult with so many characters and not having a list with information about the characters to refer to. You should be able to compile a list and copy and paste it at the end of each chapter which would make it easier for the reviewer. Good job otherwise.
reply by the author on 14-Jan-2021
|
Just coming into a chapter is difficult with so many characters and not having a list with information about the characters to refer to. You should be able to compile a list and copy and paste it at the end of each chapter which would make it easier for the reviewer. Good job otherwise.
Comment Written 14-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 14-Jan-2021
-
Thank you for the helpful review. Thank you for the suggestion. I will do that. It's helpful to know how the chapter is perceived. I've experienced that frustration with others' chapters. I do not want to do that same thing to my readers.
Comment from Gert sherwood
Liz O'Neill
Your chapter in your book Traffic
Healing Dreams
I find quite interesting about the dream Liz had about seeing Our Lord. And the way you described when his hands were bleeding.
reply by the author on 13-Jan-2021
|
Liz O'Neill
Your chapter in your book Traffic
Healing Dreams
I find quite interesting about the dream Liz had about seeing Our Lord. And the way you described when his hands were bleeding.
Comment Written 13-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 13-Jan-2021
-
Thank you for your appreciative review. I'm glad you liked it.
-
You are so welcome Liz O'Neill
Gert
Comment from Mistydawn
Wow, what dreams. Tommy should be glad he was woken. Linda probably feels better knowing that the world will replenish itself. Being in the presence of the Lord. Your story is well-written, very interesting start to finish. I look forward to reading more.
reply by the author on 13-Jan-2021
|
Wow, what dreams. Tommy should be glad he was woken. Linda probably feels better knowing that the world will replenish itself. Being in the presence of the Lord. Your story is well-written, very interesting start to finish. I look forward to reading more.
Comment Written 13-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 13-Jan-2021
-
Thank you for your enthusiastic review. My friend Linda is super religious so I asked her what she would want her dream to be. She loved the way I wrote it up.
-
It was beautiful. Very peaceful, reassuring.
I did what you suggested with Grammarly, and it worked. Maybe too good, lol. Darn those commas anyhow.
-
That is funny about the commas. When I was in school, I was corrected for too many commas. Now I've backed off & need to get the balance of enough commas. lol
Comment from lyenochka
What a great vision that Liz had and she could experience the peace of seeing the Lord. But was Tommy still sleeping and remembering about recent events. It seems that he is Sage's brother, just as they suspected.
reply by the author on 13-Jan-2021
|
What a great vision that Liz had and she could experience the peace of seeing the Lord. But was Tommy still sleeping and remembering about recent events. It seems that he is Sage's brother, just as they suspected.
Comment Written 13-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 13-Jan-2021
-
Thank you for your invested review. My friend Linda is super religious so I asked her what she would want her dream to be. She loved the way I wrote it up.
Comment from Iza Deleanu
The black drink that gives you the passage into a magnificent world: "
Her tears were mixed with snowflakes beginning to accumulate. She was no longer standing within depressing darkness. Brightness surrounding, raised her spirits. Her chant of gratefulness joined the scent of newness purifying all, as the Earth Mother would have it." Thank you for sharing and good luck with your writings.
reply by the author on 13-Jan-2021
|
The black drink that gives you the passage into a magnificent world: "
Her tears were mixed with snowflakes beginning to accumulate. She was no longer standing within depressing darkness. Brightness surrounding, raised her spirits. Her chant of gratefulness joined the scent of newness purifying all, as the Earth Mother would have it." Thank you for sharing and good luck with your writings.
Comment Written 13-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 13-Jan-2021
-
Thank you for your enthusistic review. I appreciate your support.