My True Love
The only woman for me.27 total reviews
Comment from evesayshi
In my opinion, viewed as a plaintive soliloquy, it captures the essence of unrequited love in smooth free verse, and is fully compliant with the prompt. Best wishes in the contest...
reply by the author on 12-Jan-2021
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In my opinion, viewed as a plaintive soliloquy, it captures the essence of unrequited love in smooth free verse, and is fully compliant with the prompt. Best wishes in the contest...
Comment Written 12-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 12-Jan-2021
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Thank you for your review.
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You're very welcome, Lance...Eve
Comment from Sharon Feldt
You have hit on a common theme of forlorn and unrecognized love. So many times we are not 'seen' by those we dream of or about. It would be so lovely if we could make some of our dreams materialize! Good job!
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reply by the author on 10-Jan-2021
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You have hit on a common theme of forlorn and unrecognized love. So many times we are not 'seen' by those we dream of or about. It would be so lovely if we could make some of our dreams materialize! Good job!
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 10-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 10-Jan-2021
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I didn?t read any specific edits or adjustments needed which is what forms the basis of a 4 rating. Can you give me some feedback please? After nearly 30 reviews with 5 & 6 ratings your review has me wondering what I can improve. Thank you.
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I liked your poem and the theme you chose. I felt that some of the words and sentiments, while common to many, were just that--a bit too trite. you obviously have a great deal of talent--could you use words that evoke more specific feeling--pinpointing the angst of not being 'seen' by the person you dream of and want to spend eternity with?
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I could have done what you suggest...but then I would be writing YOUR poem. It was my intention to write a free verse about My True Love, and then the final line be the impact of her not noticing me and the fact that there was no reality. Anything else would be a different poem. As a reviewer, you should rate the poem that is written, not the poem that you might have written. I not defending my work, it is very good and the other reviews support that. It is both Recognized and has an All Time Best seal. You should reconsider how you review and go back are re-read the FanStory review guidance. If there is not a specific edit or adjustment then a 4 rating is not warranted. These review guidelines are on the website. I've reviewed hundreds of poems, just like you have. There are some I literally hate, but if I don't find required edits, they get a 5. On the other hand, I reviewed a poem yesterday where every rhyme was forced to the point where the sentences were meaningless and there was no flow to the poem...I rated that poem a 3. I gave a lot of guidance to the poet. Being a reviewer carries a responsibility to be objective and a reviewer should not be subjective. Again thank you for your review and in particular responding to my request for specific feedback. Unfortunately, I'm really not satisfied with your feedback or review. I think you should look at the review guidelines more closely.
Comment from Iza Deleanu
One side crush or just a ghost story), anyway a very cute confession:"I have but one love interest,
She is the woman of my dreams.
My true love.
My destiny.
We will spend eternity together,
Every day and night." Thank you for sharing and good luck with the contest.
reply by the author on 10-Jan-2021
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One side crush or just a ghost story), anyway a very cute confession:"I have but one love interest,
She is the woman of my dreams.
My true love.
My destiny.
We will spend eternity together,
Every day and night." Thank you for sharing and good luck with the contest.
Comment Written 10-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 10-Jan-2021
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Thank you for your review
Comment from DonandVicki
The photograph is truly stunning and brings out the passion in your poem. I would bet she is or could be an object of many a mans dreams. Don and Vicki.
reply by the author on 10-Jan-2021
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The photograph is truly stunning and brings out the passion in your poem. I would bet she is or could be an object of many a mans dreams. Don and Vicki.
Comment Written 10-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 10-Jan-2021
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Thank you for your review
Comment from Raffaelina Lowcock
Unrequited love can be so deeply felt that it is impossible to think the other doesn't feel it too. But, alas that is the way it is sometimes and we have to live through it, calmly.
Ralf
reply by the author on 10-Jan-2021
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Unrequited love can be so deeply felt that it is impossible to think the other doesn't feel it too. But, alas that is the way it is sometimes and we have to live through it, calmly.
Ralf
Comment Written 10-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 10-Jan-2021
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Thank you for your review
Comment from Dorothy Farrell
Hello Lance, what a beautiful way to express how much you are attracted to this woman. All very romantic and convincing until, unfortunately -
'Why can't she see me.' Dream on - you never know what will happen LOL! Good luck in the free verse contest. Regards Dorothy x
reply by the author on 10-Jan-2021
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Hello Lance, what a beautiful way to express how much you are attracted to this woman. All very romantic and convincing until, unfortunately -
'Why can't she see me.' Dream on - you never know what will happen LOL! Good luck in the free verse contest. Regards Dorothy x
Comment Written 10-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 10-Jan-2021
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Thank you for your review.
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
A very well-written free verse poem about a love for someone that seems to be one-sided and never gets beyond a platonic friendship that often stays one sided forever.
reply by the author on 10-Jan-2021
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A very well-written free verse poem about a love for someone that seems to be one-sided and never gets beyond a platonic friendship that often stays one sided forever.
Comment Written 10-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 10-Jan-2021
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Thank you for your review.
Comment from Begin Again
Our minds and our hearts can paint a picture that no one else really ever sees. We wish and dream and even believe. Well written and I thank you for sharing. Smiles to you!
reply by the author on 10-Jan-2021
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Our minds and our hearts can paint a picture that no one else really ever sees. We wish and dream and even believe. Well written and I thank you for sharing. Smiles to you!
Comment Written 10-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 10-Jan-2021
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Thank you for your review
Comment from Seshadri_Sreenivasan
She has stolen your heart but has kindly allowed you to keep it. Yes. I see this is a one-sided love. Happens to all of us sometime or the other. True love is always a feeling! Thanks for sharing. Good luck!
reply by the author on 10-Jan-2021
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She has stolen your heart but has kindly allowed you to keep it. Yes. I see this is a one-sided love. Happens to all of us sometime or the other. True love is always a feeling! Thanks for sharing. Good luck!
Comment Written 10-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 10-Jan-2021
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Thank you for your review
Comment from Susan Larson
I relate. In high school I was a cheerleader and had a crush on a basketball player. When the guys made a basket we had our own players and did an individual cheer for him. I never met him until our 30th reunion where we happened into a conversation. I asked if he remembered I was his personal cheerleader . He said, "I didn't even know the cheerleaders came to the basketball games." As we got to talking, we both realized we might have been a good match had he only SEEN me then. But, happy ending. I was snd still am happily married.
reply by the author on 09-Jan-2021
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I relate. In high school I was a cheerleader and had a crush on a basketball player. When the guys made a basket we had our own players and did an individual cheer for him. I never met him until our 30th reunion where we happened into a conversation. I asked if he remembered I was his personal cheerleader . He said, "I didn't even know the cheerleaders came to the basketball games." As we got to talking, we both realized we might have been a good match had he only SEEN me then. But, happy ending. I was snd still am happily married.
Comment Written 09-Jan-2021
reply by the author on 09-Jan-2021
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Nice personal story. I'm glad you could relate. Thank you for your review.
