Reviews from

On a Withered Branch

5/7/5 Classic Winter Haiku

16 total reviews 
Comment from Mark Schardine
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on a withered branch
sparrows rest before long flight --
southern wind allures

When a fresh breeze comes from a south and expels the cold air, we too ponder the idea of venturing south.

 Comment Written 29-Oct-2020

reply by the author on 29-Oct-2020
    Thank you very much, Mark, you are right :)

    Hugs
Comment from lyenochka
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So cool to learn! I didn't know that sparrows migrated. Seems like they always hang around here but why not enjoy the Mexican sun as they don't have to worry about borders!

 Comment Written 29-Oct-2020

reply by the author on 29-Oct-2020
    Hah hah... Yeah, birds are not racists and don't worry about borders. I can't believe we still have more than 500 children in cages.

    Thank you very much for your review and kind feedback.

    Gypsy hugs
Comment from June Sargent
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Yes, it's time to head for warmer climes! Those turquoise waters, warm sand beaches, and swaying palms are beckoning...take me with you! Very nice seasonal haiku.

 Comment Written 29-Oct-2020

reply by the author on 29-Oct-2020
    Thank you very much for your review and kind words.

    Gypsy hugs
Comment from Mike Stevens
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Another fine poem, Gypsy--and I wish I could fly south for the winter--of course, if I could I'd spew my cookies on the people below, plus, my arms are so out of practice!

 Comment Written 29-Oct-2020

reply by the author on 29-Oct-2020
    Thank you very much for your review and kind words, Mike.

    Gypsy hugs
Comment from Mark D. R.
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Gypsy,

My guess you researched Cancun as their destination. Mexico has an extra syllable! It is a great tourist destination. I have never been there, but had visited the Yucatán peninsula and stayed in Merida.

I like your artwork and colors for your Haiku post. Good idea to clue us in about 'withered branch' being a winter kigo. It is likely not obvious to other readers too.

sparrows pause ere long flight home ??

Mark

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 Comment Written 29-Oct-2020

reply by the author on 29-Oct-2020
    Thank you for your feedback. I changed it.

    on a withered branch
    sparrows rest before long flight ?
    Mexican breeze calls






Comment from Joan E.
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Like the swallows in Capistrano, we have the sparrows who make a shorter trip to Cancun. I enjoyed your 5-7-5 haiku about winter. Best wishes in the contest- Joan

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 Comment Written 29-Oct-2020

reply by the author on 29-Oct-2020
    Thank you for your review and feedback. I changed it. What do you think?

    on a withered branch
    sparrows rest before long flight ?
    Mexican breeze calls
reply by Joan E. on 29-Oct-2020
    Yes--I like this version better, with the use of "flight" and more general "Mexico". Smiles- Joan
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2020
    Thank you :)