Harrison Harrington Smythson
a story poem for children150 total reviews
Comment from donnadiann
Wow, Brooke, this one is a long poem, but that's good. I like the character name, and you have good s sound alliterations. Charming way to show, sometimes we have it good and don't know it. Very good flow...ship set sail. Delightful imagery all through your poem;) Have the happiest day:)
reply by the author on 02-Sep-2014
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Wow, Brooke, this one is a long poem, but that's good. I like the character name, and you have good s sound alliterations. Charming way to show, sometimes we have it good and don't know it. Very good flow...ship set sail. Delightful imagery all through your poem;) Have the happiest day:)
Comment Written 02-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 02-Sep-2014
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Thanks so much, donna - the only time I write long poems is if they're story poems with a plot that keeps moving forward - never in a million years would I write something like a love poem this long LOL Brooke
Comment from TAB_that's me
Brooke, it's a bit long as a children's poem but here again, I say - a book!! A wonderful child's book - each stanza is a page with artwork!
Teresa
reply by the author on 02-Sep-2014
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Brooke, it's a bit long as a children's poem but here again, I say - a book!! A wonderful child's book - each stanza is a page with artwork!
Teresa
Comment Written 02-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 02-Sep-2014
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Teresa, thank you so much :-) yes, my intention is it would be a children's book with illustrations
Brooke
Comment from boxergirl
Another great child's poem about a young boy's dreams. The topic of dinosaurs is popular with children. I am amazed at how they can memorize all the complicated names. Your story poem is engaging from start to finish! 8-)
reply by the author on 02-Sep-2014
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Another great child's poem about a young boy's dreams. The topic of dinosaurs is popular with children. I am amazed at how they can memorize all the complicated names. Your story poem is engaging from start to finish! 8-)
Comment Written 02-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 02-Sep-2014
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boxergirl, thank you so much :-) Brooke
Comment from Preston McWhorter
Hi, :-) Brooke,
This is an exceptional child's story within a poem because of its long length and the large number of excellent rhymes. The figurative language is outstanding (shook the earth's floor. It has good meter and follows a rhyme scheme consistently.
Preston
reply by the author on 02-Sep-2014
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Hi, :-) Brooke,
This is an exceptional child's story within a poem because of its long length and the large number of excellent rhymes. The figurative language is outstanding (shook the earth's floor. It has good meter and follows a rhyme scheme consistently.
Preston
Comment Written 02-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 02-Sep-2014
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Thank you so very much, Preston, for this generous response to my story poem :-) Brooke
Comment from GeraldS
This was fun to read. I guess I'm partial to children's poetry. At least I can understand the narrative. As usual, well done.
reply by the author on 02-Sep-2014
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This was fun to read. I guess I'm partial to children's poetry. At least I can understand the narrative. As usual, well done.
Comment Written 02-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 02-Sep-2014
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Gerald, thank you so much :-) Brooke
Comment from Adri7enne
Ooh, I just loved reading your poem out loud. What terrific rhyming, Brooke. And a nice, lilting rhythm that made it a pleasure to read. Sawyer sure is getting an education out there, in the north west. They went up as far as Calgary, Alberta? They are adventurous. Great fun, Brooke.
reply by the author on 02-Sep-2014
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Ooh, I just loved reading your poem out loud. What terrific rhyming, Brooke. And a nice, lilting rhythm that made it a pleasure to read. Sawyer sure is getting an education out there, in the north west. They went up as far as Calgary, Alberta? They are adventurous. Great fun, Brooke.
Comment Written 02-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 02-Sep-2014
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Adrienne, thank you so much for your generous response to this poem :-) Brooke
Comment from Louise Michelle
Hi Brooke,
I hesitate to ever make suggestions because of your expertise and the fact that my poems can be off meter (especially one line in my last posting), but I did want to point this out:
but everyone knows the dinosaurs died.
Did you mean to write: that the dinosaurs died?
This is a terrific adventure for children and adults alike. You always have a clever way of avoiding situations that could be too graphic.
Hugs,
Lou
I'm laughing at myself because I just read that stanza again and I was wrong. I should have known better to question your writing, especially when I'm so drowsy this morning.
reply by the author on 02-Sep-2014
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Hi Brooke,
I hesitate to ever make suggestions because of your expertise and the fact that my poems can be off meter (especially one line in my last posting), but I did want to point this out:
but everyone knows the dinosaurs died.
Did you mean to write: that the dinosaurs died?
This is a terrific adventure for children and adults alike. You always have a clever way of avoiding situations that could be too graphic.
Hugs,
Lou
I'm laughing at myself because I just read that stanza again and I was wrong. I should have known better to question your writing, especially when I'm so drowsy this morning.
Comment Written 02-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 02-Sep-2014
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Thanks so much, Louise - no, didn't mean the line you wrote, but I promise to reread the line :-) Brooke
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LOL - now I'm utterly confused, but at least my foggy, allergy brain has cleared up. This morning I was comparing the syllable count in the stanza I pointed out with those in other stanzas. I goofed plain and simple. Oh, let's drop the whole thing, hee hee.
Comment from James Dooney
I love the rhyme style u have given us here. I feel that the stretching of the verses such as the first one with the same rhyme over all the lines actually enhances this work and gives it some balls. Its like it flows freely out of a person when it happens. Very well done !
reply by the author on 02-Sep-2014
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I love the rhyme style u have given us here. I feel that the stretching of the verses such as the first one with the same rhyme over all the lines actually enhances this work and gives it some balls. Its like it flows freely out of a person when it happens. Very well done !
Comment Written 02-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 02-Sep-2014
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James, thanks so much - I don't think anyone ever told me my poetry has balls before. LOL :-) Brooke
Comment from Margaret Snowdon
So Harrison Harrington said his goodbyes,
chanted some magic and scrunched up his eyes,
promised he'd never again run away,
and when morning dawned, in his own bed he lay.
what a delightful children story in a poem, so
cleverly thought out and well presented - and
I like Sawyer's pose.
great.
Margaret
reply by the author on 02-Sep-2014
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So Harrison Harrington said his goodbyes,
chanted some magic and scrunched up his eyes,
promised he'd never again run away,
and when morning dawned, in his own bed he lay.
what a delightful children story in a poem, so
cleverly thought out and well presented - and
I like Sawyer's pose.
great.
Margaret
Comment Written 02-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 02-Sep-2014
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Margaret, thank you so very much for your generous response to this poem, my friend. I take such delight in his various poses and expressions. LOL :-) Brooke
Comment from Marn
A lovely poem that tells a beautiful story.I enjoyed reading this.It flows well and rhymes keeping the reader interested.Well done a work of art.
reply by the author on 02-Sep-2014
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A lovely poem that tells a beautiful story.I enjoyed reading this.It flows well and rhymes keeping the reader interested.Well done a work of art.
Comment Written 02-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 02-Sep-2014
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Marn, thank you so much :-) Brooke