Comment from Minglement

Good

Well, I got a kick out of your entry for the 'Story In A Poem' Contest. Delicate subject matter handled well and a fun and clever read. Well done. Good luck in the contest (but not too much LOL. Marcia

 Comment Written 27-Feb-2011

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reply by the author on 27-Feb-2011

Thank you. I'd like to check out all the other entries for the contest but not sure how to go about finding them.

reply by Minglement on 27-Feb-2011

You're most welcome. I would also like to read the other entries, but they make it difficult when it's a site sponsored contest. Otherwise, the entries are all listed at the bottom of the contest description. I guess we just have to hope when their works show up, the authors make a note that they're for the contest to give us a clud. Again, good luck, I'm sure yours will place well, it's a great entry. Take care, Marcia

Comment from psalmist

Excellent

LOL. Ah, men take such pride in their jewels! This was very funny with an excellent rhythm and rhyming that made it a delight to read. Good luck to you in the contest.

 Comment Written 27-Feb-2011

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reply by the author on 27-Feb-2011

Well, if we can't be proud of our jewels .....
Thanks for the kind comments

Comment from judy corcoran

Excellent

hilarious
a really funny story (i'm obviously of the tender gender lol)

i still have a smile on my face
just love out of all of it that i love
'My darling, 'She who must be obeyed',
Investigated the racket made,

Surveyed my pitiful cringing plight,
And tenderly asked, "Are you alright?"
I told my tale and shortly after
More screams were heard, this time of laughter'

thanks for a great read
good luck in the contset
love judy

 Comment Written 27-Feb-2011

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reply by the author on 27-Feb-2011

Thank you! Putting a smile on the face - that's what this kind of poetry is all about.

Comment from kiwigirl2821

Excellent

Oh this is truly funny! Laughing still at the ridiculous peril suffered in this hilarious work. You used great words a nice cadence and it is just perfect! Nice work. xoxo Kiwi

 Comment Written 27-Feb-2011

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reply by the author on 27-Feb-2011

Thank you kiwigirl - I guess we need something lighthearted to take our minds off recent events!

Comment from Haggard

Good

Yeah haha. That's pretty good. Long, long, long attention-consuming build-up. The ending was filth haha, but it could've been written better in my opinion, but it's great that you managed the adept rhymes the whole way through.

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 Comment Written 27-Feb-2011

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reply by the author on 27-Feb-2011

Thanks for that. You're right, the build up is long - hopefully arousing attention rather than consuming it as the reader waits to see where it's going. That was the plan anyway!

Comment from viking

Exceptional

What a talented writer you are. I was laughing so much and felt really hooked reading this funny and interesting poem.
You managed to keep a reader curious to the last line.

 Comment Written 27-Feb-2011

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reply by the author on 27-Feb-2011

Thank you so much for your kind review - I enjoyed writing this and just hoped that others would appreciate it too!

Comment from jadapenn

Exceptional

Oh, heartaches by the number and troubles by the score. lol. Did we slip. How on earth can you not protect the family jewels before stepping out of that dang shower. I'm sorry, I'm still rolling on the floor laughing my "a" off. Can't help you too much on this good work. lol. Go for it, win the dang contest, this is too good not to.
Hey, luv jada

 Comment Written 27-Feb-2011

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reply by the author on 27-Feb-2011

Thanks again!!

Comment from Perp Ihebom

Excellent

Your poem about this bathroom incident is really masterful. I love the humour and wit you added to the tale. The rhymes are also well done. kudos

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 Comment Written 27-Feb-2011

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reply by the author on 27-Feb-2011

Thanks - it was fun to write - I am just not sure how readers will respond